Crazy Love
by Pixie8401
Summary: Edward and Bella are destined to be together but obstacles lie in their way. To finally be together they have to find a way over these hurdles ****IN HAITIUS****
1. A new beginning

**A/N: Hey everyone... firstly i would like to thank Eddzie for being my beta on this. It is our first attempt to write a story and although i have the first chapter in my head for a while, i have yet to know where it is going. Please be kind with your reviews but honest.**

**There is probably 2 things that I am obsessed with, one is Twilight and the other is Jazz or more importantly Michael Buble' He is so gorgeous and a great singer. **

**Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns all that is Twilight. The characters are hers but the story is mine. **

_**Chapter 1 - BPOV**_

Alice and I have been friends for what seems like forever. I met her when we both went to preschool. I can't believe that we became the bestest friends from the first day we saw each other. Alice had been so easy to get along with that I knew I could tell her anything.

So here we are, driving from Forks Washington to Seattle. Heading towards our new lives and our new jobs. Alice is going to work for the top Fashion House and I am going to work for one of the top hospitals in the state. I have finally graduated from medical school majoring in midwifery. I hope to be assigned to a great doctor that I can learn lots from. I know that I don't know everything but I am hoping that I can be all that I can be. I love babies and to help them come into this world would be the best feeling in the world. I have seen many births but once the baby is given to the parents, the amount of love and joy in the room gives you a high for the rest of the day!!!

"Bella, what are you thinking about?" Alice asked during our long drive out of the city.

"I was just thinking that I am glad that we are making this trip together. And wondering what our new employers have in store for us. We both have this weekend to finish unpacking and then off to work on Monday. I seriously can't believe this is happening to us."

"Well, this is the start to our new lives. We aren't the same people we were In Forks you know Bella. We have grown up a lot and we are more mature than our other friends. There wouldn't be enough mental stimulation for either of us. We need this change."

"Yeah I know. But we are travelling to the unknown. I really don't know what to expect or what they expect from us" I could actually say that we have never really gone out of Forks before. I am a little apprehensive. We have been to Seattle a couple of times looking for apartments to rent. Nothing seemed to fit our new lifestyle. We needed to look like we belonged here and that we weren't from a small town.

We had found this wonderful apartment that suited us and was in our price range as well. It looked stunning. It was a two story apartment where our bedrooms were on the second floor and there was even a guest room on the first floor. Each bedroom had it own bathroom with a spa bath big enough for two.

We had been moving our things into our apartment for the past two weeks. It would have been better for us to use a removalist but we couldn't afford that, not yet anyway. This is our final trip to Seattle and I am feeling a little sad to be leaving forks behind. My family is there. My dad, Charlie, who is chief of Police and my mum, Renee, who is a carefree artist. She is doing quite well selling her paintings to art galleries. They offered to help us out but we wanted to do this on our own. My parents could easily afford it but Alice's parents couldn't. She had been adopted at a young age and is on a quest to find her real parents. But not until she is settled into her new life In Seattle. She had done a little digging while In Forks but all she could find out was they lived In Seattle back then. Thus the appeal to move to Seattle. I wanted to be there for her once she had found them. She needed the support and I always told her that I would be there for her when she needed it.

Alice's adoptive parents are lovely. They had always been upfront with Alice and told her that she was adopted. Billy and Sue have both been married once before and have had children from their other relationships. Billy's wife had died giving birth to their son Jacob. Sue's ex husband, Harry had left her when she was pregnant with their second child Seth. They had an older child, Leah. Once Billy and Sue got married, they decided that they wanted another child to call their own. They soon found out that they couldn't have children together as Sue had a few health Issues after she gave birth to Seth. She had breast cancer and once her treatment had finished, the doctors had told her that she was lucky that they had caught it early and that she was in remission. That was great news but on the down side she was told that the treatment they had to give her left her no chance of ever having anymore children. So Billy and Sue adopted Alice. They fell in love with her upbeat personality and perfect features. She had them wrapped around their little fingers. She always made them smile, even on a bad day. They lived on the reservation and always made enough money to get by.

We had spent the rest of our journey in silence, just listening to music. I was daydreaming a lot when I wasn't driving. The last time we came to Seattle, we had both our cars. We left mine here because we knew that we only had one more car load to bring. We pretty much unpacked everything as we brought it to our new place.

Once we arrived to what is now called our home, we were too excited to unpack the last few bags that we just brought with us. "Let's get freshened up and hit the town" laughed Alice. We both ran up the stairs and into our bathrooms, we quickly showered and in no time Alice was at my door ready to go. I was still in my bathrobe, staring at my closet wondering what to wear.

"Go and get your make up on and do your hair. I will look for something for you to wear".

I sauntered into the bathroom and quickly brushed my hair and put some eyeliner and lip gloss on. I'm not into wearing too much makeup. I had a quick glance in the mirror satisfied with what I had done. I let my hair hang over my shoulders as I couldn't think of what to do with it. I thought natural and wavy is the way to go. I went back into my bedroom and saw that Alice had taken out a slim three quarter length black skirt and a white crossover top on my bed. She also took out a pair of strappy high heel sandals for me to wear.

"Ali babe, where are we going??? Aren't I going to be a little over dressed???" I knew the answer before I even asked the questions, so I put on the clothes that she laid out for me.

I met her in the lounge room. And she looked a million dollars. Alice was wearing a black dress that came just below her knee and was figure hugging. She wore red high heels with a matching bag. She looked like she was ready for the fashion house, but was the fashion house ready for Alice Black.

We hit the town and went to a quaint Jazz club, Dimitrious Jazz Alley. We walked in to a dimly lit place with nice wooden tables and everything looked antique. We waited to be seated and were told that there was a 30 minute wait for a table. We put our names down on the waiting list and went to the bar for a drink. We found a couple of stools at the bar between some men. They sounded a little rowdy and I was wondering what was so worth celebrating. Alice and I ordered Long Island Iced Teas and sat down at the bar.

"I am so glad that we decide to come to Seattle. Everything looks so different and cool. So what do you want to do tomorrow? It is the only day we have free until we start our new jobs." I asked Alice excitedly.

"How about we go out for brunch and take in the sights. Who knows when we will get a chance now that you are working in a hospital and you will have all these crazy hours?"

We glanced over to the men next to us and started giggling at their robust attitude. "What are you all celebrating over here?" I heard Alice ask the man closer to her. "Our mate over here is getting married and we are trying to give him a night to remember."

"When is he getting married?"

"He just asked her and we are celebrating because he has been dating her for over 7 years and it was about time he popped the question!!!"

"My name is Alice, and this is Bella. We just moved here and we are kind of celebrating too. We start our new jobs on Monday."

"I'm sure the guys won't mind if you join us. My name is Jasper."

"We would love to join you but we are waiting for a table. Maybe a little later we can meet you on the dance floor."

"No worries. See you later ladies"

"Hey Alice, he is kinda cute. And he seems really nice. You should seriously look for him after dinner and dance with him." I smiled at Alice with an approving look that told her to go for it.

A few minutes later we were seated at tour table and we had a view of the band. They were playing Michael Buble's 'I still haven't met you yet'.

_I'm Not Surprised  
Not Everything Lasts  
I've Broken My Heart So Many Times,  
I Stop Keeping Track.  
Talk Myself In  
I Talk Myself Out  
I Get All Worked Up  
And Then I Let Myself Down._

I Tried So Very Hard Not To Loose It  
I Came Up With A Million Excuses  
I Thought I Thought Of Every Possibility

And I Know Someday That It'll All Turn Out  
You'll Make Me Work So We Can Work To Work It Out  
And I Promise You Kid That I'll Give So Much More Than I Get  
I Just Haven't Met You Yet

Mmmmm ....

I Might Have To Wait  
I'll Never Give Up  
I Guess It's Half Timing  
And The Other Half's Luck  
Wherever You Are  
Whenever It's Right  
You Come Out Of Nowhere And Into My Life

I really like that song and started singing along while looking over the menu. We ordered out food and some more drinks. After dinner we went to the dance floor and started dancing. We were hoping that the guys would find us as we haven't seen them since we left them to go and eat.

While dancing and occasionally kicking back on the sofas near the dance floor, a few guys came up to us and asked us if they could join us. We agreed and before we knew it about 10 guys joined us. We noticed Jasper among them and were relieved as we smiled a hello in his direction. We all chatted and danced and because we had had a long day, we decided to call it a night. We asked Jasper who was getting married so that we could congratulate him. Apparently his name was Edward and he had already left to go home to his future bride. We said our goodbyes and went home.

Alice and I were still on a high when we got back to our new place. We got a couple of beers from the fridge and just chilled out on the couch.

"I can't believe that the guys were so nice to us tonight. Jasper is cute, did you actually get a chance to talk to him tonight?" I smirked at Alice.

"No but he seemed interested in talking to you all night. What were you guys talking about anyway?" Alice asked sheepishly.

"He asked what we do for a living. I told him that I am a midwife at Seattle Grace Hospital and that you are a fashion designer. Apart from that, he told me that he was a lawyer and so was Edward. They are working on a huge case so tonight was a good chance for them to let their hair down and have a good time."

"OOOhhh, did he tell you what kind of case they are working on?" Alice asked jumping in her seat excitedly.

"No, and I didn't get a chance to ask because they guys took him away and then we left. I don't know if they are allowed to tell us with the client confidentiality agreement. At least we met some nice people on our first night here."

We both decided that we were too tired and both headed off to bed.

My alarm went off at 5am. I am both nervous and excited to start work today but I feel like I haven't slept much. I got up and had a nice hot relaxing shower. I tied my hair up into a pony tail and got ready for work. I went downstairs and put on the coffee pot and made myself some breakfast. I contemplated making my lunch but I thought I would just grab something from the hospital seeing as though I didn't know what my schedule would be. I looked at the time and realised that I will be late if I didn't get my finger out and get to work. I left Alice a message on the fridge wishing her luck on her first day as well.

I walked out to my car and drove to the hospital in silence. I needed to get myself in the right frame of mind to start work. I don't know how i made it to the hospital in one piece because I sure as hell weren't concentrating on the road. I parked my car and headed into the hospital. I went up to the information counter and was struck in awe at the large arrangement of flowers that were on the desk.

"You must be some lucky lady... they are beautiful! I'm Isabella Swan and I am the new midwife here. can you tell me where i need to be please?" I smiled at the beautiful lady behind the desk. She had georgeous red wavy hair and had a porcelain complexion that was perfect.

"My name is Victoria and you need to be on the 6th floor and head left to the Chief's office. Dr. Cullen is expecting you."

"Thank you very much."

"Actually Isabella, these flowers are for you. I wish i could say they were for me. They are from a gentleman by the name of Jasper. You can leave them here and collect them on your way home if you like."

I smiled and nodded. I grabbed the card attached to the flowers hoping to find a contact number for Jasper and thank him for the flowers. I thought that he and Alice would have hit it off. He seemed interested in Alice while we were talking. But then again I was vague in telling him where she worked. I headed up to the 6th floor and towards the chief's office. I took a deep breath and knocked on the door.

"Come in" I heard in a exasperated tone. I know it's like 6am, he couldn't be that busy, surely. I opened the door and walked slowly into the office.

"I'm Isabella Swan, I'm here for my first day." i smiled weakly at the man in front of me who looks like he has lost something.

"Hi, Isabella, I'm Carlisle. I am under the impression that you are our new midwife? sorry, I seem to have misplaced your file and was hoping to have found it before you came in this morning." He laughed.

"Please call me Bella, and yes, I am your new midwife. i know I am early but I wanted to get settled before I started my shift and take a look around if that's ok?"

"Actually, let me show you around. it will take my mind off a few personal issues we have going on. A few things before we start our tour. I ask that you maintain an air of professionalism at all time around the patients. Do not let any patient hear you swear and if you don't know anything please ask. I would like to maintain our clean record for any mistakes and mis-diagnosis.I know that some people can get extremely nervous on their first day or week for that matter and they can make mistakes, some grave ones, so please be careful"'

I heard a hint of sternness in his voice. I couldn't get over the charming good looks of Carlisle. He has unsheveled blonde hair with piercing blue eyes. He looks so young to be the Chief but who am I to question. "No worries Dr. Cullen. I take pride in my job and I will never put the reputation of the hospital on the line because of me."

"Please call me Carlisle and I say the same thing to everyone that arrives on their first day. Let's go shall we?"

We headed to the lifts and Carlisle showed me around the hispital. He pointed out my locker in the staff room and I put all my things away. he then took me to the maternity ward and introduced me to a few of my collegues. I saw 3 ladies, Tanya, who had mid length brown hair and blue eyes. She was pretty and looked like she could be a Victoria Secret Model, which Carlisle had introduced her as his future daughter. Then there was Angela, who had long black hair and green eyes but wasn't as pretty. And lastly was Jane with short blonde hair and blue eyes. She was gorgeous.

Before Carlisle left to go back to his office, he handed me a pager and told me that he would page me once he found my file with my id and security pass. "Oh Bella, there is a VIP patient coming in to have a check up. I would like it if you would be her attending. She is very important to me personally. And it would cause a conflict for one of the other midwives."

"Sure, what's her name? I'll get her file and look through it so i can be up to speed on her progress." I replied enthusiastically.


	2. Confused Heart

**A/N: Again, thanks to Edzzie for being my Beta and to Anaberry for joining me on this quest to complete a good story. One that will be enjoyed by all, we hope. And thank you to all of you that have reviewed. It is good to know that our story is being read and liked. **

**I am still trying to figure out where I am going with this but hopefully it will become clear as time goes on.**

**Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns all that is Twilight. But the story outline is mine.**

_**JPOV**_

It has only been 2 days since I met the girls at the Jazz club. Bella... oh Bella, looked stunning and she didn't flaunt her assets like some of the tarts you see nowadays. I found it easy to talk to Bella and loved it when she fucking blushed. I noticed that her blush went down her body. I followed it to the tips of her breasts. I could get lost looking at her breasts all day. What I wouldn't do to them. _Fuck now I have a fucking hard on._ I shook my head to get the images I just created out of my fucking head. _Get a grip will you!_ I shifted in my chair to readjust myself hoping that my wood would go down sometime soon.

Alice was so bubbly and she oozes extravagance. She looked stunning as well and I wonder if she designs everything that she wears. She looked like she just walked out of fucking Versace in an overpriced dress. Don't get me wrong, she looked fucking hot, but she might be a bit fucking too high maintenance for me.

I know that today was going to be the girls first day at work and I didn't know where Alice worked so I couldn't send her flowers. But Bella did mention that she worked at Seattle Grace Hospital and I was hoping that the flowers I sent for her got to the hospital before she arrived. I asked the lady to put a card on the flowers which was supposed to read _'Bella, Good Luck on your first day at work. Hope to see you again sometime soon. Jasper'. _I left my phone number on the card as well in a hope that she will call me.

_Ring... Ring... Ring... Ring..._

_Fuck me. _Damn cell phone. I should learn to put it on silent or maybe I should stop fucking day dreaming. Looking at my phone I didn't recognise the phone number, I contemplated ignoring this fuckers call so I could go back to thinking about Bella. But like a fuck wit that I am I answered it and was pleasantly surprised when I heard Bella's voice on the other end. It didn't ever cross my mind that she would call so soon, hmmm. She sounded a little nervous and her voice was so sweet. I could listen to it for hours. OMG what was she saying??? I have to stop daydreaming.

"Sorry, could you repeat that, I was a little distracted by... uh... a file that has just landed on my desk." SHIT!!! Hopefully that saved my ass.

"I just wanted to ring you and thank you for the flowers. It was a nice surprise, they are really beautiful. Maybe one day we can meet up at the Jazz club again."

"You're welcome and I'll be looking forward to that day! Have to go but call me when you're free." I was hoping that it would be sooner rather than later.

"Will do and thanks again, Bye."

Whoa, I think I may be in there with a chance. Just have to go slow. So much for trying to deflate my now throbbing wood.

"What are you fucking thinking about???" I jumped and looked toward the voice to see Edward smirking at my doorway.

"Hey bro, I was just thinking about the girls we met on Saturday night. One of them really caught my eye and I sent her flowers to wish her luck on her first day at work." Smirking as I my thoughts headed to Bella once again.

"Oh really now!!! I didn't get a chance to meet them seeing as though there were about 20 fucking people celebrating my proposal to Tanya." Edward stepped further into my office and sat down on the other side of my desk. "Sometimes I wonder if I am doing the right thing. Is Tanya the right person for me? I know I shouldn't be having second thoughts but we have been together for 7 years and I am wondering if I proposed because I still fucking love her or whether it's out of obligation." I could see a hint of despair in his eyes.

I took a deep breath and looked down. That was some heavy shit that just came out of his mouth and I have never seen him like this or heard him speak like that. And my dick just went down. Yeah! "Fuck man I can't give you advice on that one. I've never been in that situation. The best fucking person to talk to is your father or Em. You do love her, don't you? Doesn't Rose have an appointment at the hospital today? Why don't you take her and then talk to the big man then?"

"That's just it, I thought I did love her." Edward nodded in agreement while running his hand through his hair. He normally does this fucking shit when he is nervous about something. It usually happens when he is just about to enter the courtroom. He has been to court enough fucking times to get a grip but he still gets nervous and that damn trait of his. He has all the girls swooning on him but he doesn't give a shit. Then again, he does have Tanya. She is pretty hot but I didn't think that they would last this fucking long. I mean the kid just never seems happy for someone who is supposed to be in love.

Going out on the weekend wasn't a celebration, it was more a fucking mourning. He won't have a life once that fucking ring is on her finger. I honestly think his doing it out of obligation like he said but fucked if I know what I'm talking about I am in no position to give him advice my most serious relationship lasted all of 36 hrs and I was 16 years old!

Edward left my office and I had to get my fucking head in check so that I could deal with our clients that are coming in today. How can I work when I have Bella on my mind?

_Ring... Ring... Ring... Ring..._

"Hello, Jasper Whitlock speaking."

_EPOV_

I can't believe that I am having second thoughts about marrying Tanya. I have been with her for 7 years and it just felt right. But now I'm not so sure if the feelings I have for her are the same now as they were then. I have so many fucking feelings I don't know where to start in deciphering them. Jasper was no fucking help either. The best advice he could give me was to go and see my dad. Yeah like Carlisle Cullen knows all there is to fucking know about love.

I should know more about my feelings towards Tanya. After all we have been living together for the past 6 years. But something's just not right. I just don't have that connection or spark that we used to have. Picking up the phone I dialled Rose's number.

"Hey Rose, how you doing? Do you still have your appointment at the hospital today?" I figured Jasper was right that I should go and see my father and talk everything through with him. I could even ask Rose's opinion while I take her.

"Hey E, I'm good and yeah still going to the hospital. Emmett can't get time off work so I'm going alone this time."

"Want me to come with you? I can take you there, I want to talk to dad while I'm there."

"Yeah that would be good. At least I will have some company for a while. You sure you just want to see dad? Sure you don't want to go so you can see Tanya?" I could hear the cheeky smile while she said that.

"Fuck Rose, no, just need to see dad! I need to ask his opinion about something that's all." I hope I didn't hurt her feelings after saying that. It was a bit fucking harsh. I know how pregnant women can be all emotional. Tanya never stops complaining that the women she sees are always emotional.

"Fine! My appointment is at 1pm, but pick me up by 12.30pm please. Bye E and chill the fuck out. I was only joking!" She sounded hurt. Why do I always hurt her? She is the best sister a guy could ask for.

I hung up the phone and looked at the clock. It was a little before 12pm so I headed out to get Rosalie. I wanted to talk to her before we get to the hospital. On the way to Pick up Rose I rang my father and asked if he had some time to see me while Rose was getting examined He made sure that Tanya would be on a break and that I would have no opportunities to be held up. He had a lot of work to do and could make time for me but I couldn't take too long.

I picked up Rose and told her what I was feeling. She thought that I was getting nervous because I had proposed. I mentioned that I didn't feel the same spark that I had for the first few years we were together.

"Maybe you just need to get away together and see if the spark returns. You know Tanya isn't the most popular person in my books but if she makes you happy than I am happy for you. But it doesn't mean that I have to be nice to her." I saw a glimmer of hope in her eyes that I would retract my proposal. I needed to seriously think about all this and see if this is what I really want. I know she doesn't want kids but I do. Sometimes it's like we aren't on the same page.

We spent the rest of the journey to the hospital in silence. When we arrived, I took Rose up to the maternity ward. We walked up to the nurses' station to announce Rose's arrival.

"Hey Edward, are you here to see Tanya? Because she just went to lunch." I had met this nurse before, I think her name was Jessica. And she was doing the flirty thing again. Stop battering your fucking eyelashes. It is so unbecoming.

"No, just here with Rose and I need to speak to my father, not that it's any of your fucking business". This girl is always flirting with me whenever I come to the hospital. You would think she would learn even after I proposed to Tanya that I was off the market.

As I turned to take Rose to the waiting room I caught a glimpse of this beautiful woman. She was breathtaking. She had long wavy brown hair and brown eyes. This was beauty in all its forms. Fuck, now I have no idea what I am feeling. As they say, you can look but can't touch. Tanya would flip if she caught me looking at this woman like this. I had to pick up my chin and followed Rose through the next doorway.

"I'm just going to see dad now, I'll wait for you here when I'm done. Take it easy and good luck." I was hoping to see this mystery woman again as I headed out to the lifts. No such luck. I guess I will have to keep the images I have imbedded in my brain to remember.

"Ok, E see you soon." I heard Rose reply as I walked away.

I headed to the 6th floor and knocked on my father's door. He beckoned me to come in and I sat behind his desk. He had files piled high on his desk and was rummaging through them as if he had lost something and was trying to remember where he placed it.

"Hey dad, you look really busy. Maybe I should come back another day." I didn't really want to interrupt him, after all he did say that he didn't have too much time to spare.

"No it's ok, just lost a file for my new staff member. I should really finish these files and put them away and maybe I won't lose anything. I just need to find her pass so that she has access to all areas of the hospital. What's on your mind?" He sat on his chair awaiting my questions.

"I just wanted to talk through my feelings at the moment as I don't know if I have actually done the right thing. Tanya and I have been together for the past 7 years and I proposed. That much you know already. After re-evaluating everything, I am starting to wonder if I proposed out of obligation or because I am really in love with her. All I know is that the spark that we had earlier on in our relationship is not there anymore. I don't want to get married to someone that I don't really love anymore. Am I making any fucking sense?" It felt like I had just spilled my guts in one breath so I took a deep breath and watched my father contemplate a response.

"Did you feel like this when you proposed? Are you actually in love with her or do you love her as a friend?" I was shocked that, that was the first thing that came out of his mouth. I know that my family don't really like Tanya so I was fucking expecting him to start saying that I should get rid of her.

"I did but it kind of felt right at the time. I'm not so fucking sure now. I think I only love her as a friend. I don't feel a connection to her anymore. "

"Well I think you just answered your own question. I can't tell you what to do Edward, I can only guide you into finding out the answers on your own. You know how we feel about Tanya, but I will not let that cloud my judgement and I won't let that influence what advice I give you. Do you know what you want to do or is there something else I can help you with? I need to find this security pass for Isabella." He started looking through files on his desk again. "Ah, finally found it. Sorry son, I have to keep going."

He looked extremely busy and even though there was more I wanted to ask, I thought it best to let him be. I could always go over to speak to him and mom later or even speak to Emmett. "All cool, dad. Sorry I held you up this long. I'll go get Rose and get back to work. Thanks!" I gave dad a sad smile and turned to leave.

"Anytime. You will do the right thing when you figure yourself out. Take a break and get away. I can keep Tanya busy until you come back. If you want?" He sincerely looked concerned for my well being. Maybe a break is a good idea.

"Thanks dad, I'll see you later. I'll let you know what I decide. Bye!" I walked out of his office and headed for the maternity ward. Hopefully Rose is finished. I just needed to get out of here before Tanya comes back.

I walked into the waiting room and sat down. Rose wasn't finished yet. I picked up a magazine and flipped through it. Not actually reading any of it. My father had given me a lot to think about. Somewhere in my thoughts, I could hear Rose's voice in the corridor. I walked to meet her and caught a glimpse of the mystery woman again. She was a goddess. My heart started pounding in my chest and smiled hello to her. Rose walked straight past me and I followed. My god her beauty surpasses Tanya's. Tanya has the looks of a model and this woman has so much inner beauty that she positively glows. I have to ask Rose who she is and I certainly don't want to ask Tanya. I make it a point not to come to the hospital much because I don't want it seen that Tanya would get preferential treatment and not have to do any work because I am the chief's son. So I don't know all the midwives or nurses that work here.

"How'd it go? Everything ok with the baby?" I thought it best to start off lightly and work my way into finding out who that mystery woman is.

"Baby is fine. Growing normally as far as she can tell. I heard the heartbeat for the first time which was amazing. She confirmed that I am 12 weeks pregnant and my due date is October 1st. It took longer this time because I had to have a routine ultrasound. Sorry about that. Hope you weren't waiting long." She looked at me apologetically.

"That's fine, dad gave me a lot to think about and I was kind of lost in my thoughts when I heard your voice. Was that the new midwife? I have never seen her before." I smirked and hoped Rose would give me a shit load of information about her. I felt as though I wanted to know everything about her.

"Yeah, she is really nice. Her name is Isabella and she was quite talkative. She made me feel comfortable so quickly. Sorry but I couldn't feel like that when Tanya examined me. Apparently, I am her first patient that she will have. She said that dad called me a VIP patient and she was to take over my file. I am happy with that. She has a great bedside manner. She asked how Emmett and I met and she genuinely looked interested." Rose talked all the way to her house. She still didn't give me any information to think about.

When I parked in front to drop her off, Rose told me that she will ask Isabella about herself. She saw that I had an instant attraction to Isabella and wanted to see me happy.

I drove back to work and saw Jasper practically pulling his hair out. He was running around like a chicken without its fucking head.

"Hey dude, what's up?" I said laughing at the sight.

"Big problems have come up in the Denali case. Oh, how did you go with your dad?"

"Yeah, good! He gave me more to fucking think about but told me to take a break and get away for a couple of days. I may just do that. I need to get my head back in order before any big cases start in court.

"Do you know when you are going away? I was thinking that we could go back to the jazz club and meet the girls I was telling you about. They have both moved into town over the weekend, That is if Tanya will let you." He looked disappointed after the last statement. It was true, Taya pretty much ran my life. Is this where I really want to be?

"All cool man, I will be there. Tanya can have the night without me and can go out with that fucking tart Jessica." I was determined to go out. I needed space from Tanya and our whole situation. I headed out to talk to my boss. Aro and Caius can be quite intimidating towards others but I seem to have a good rapport with them. They know I work hard and get things done. I needed to see if I could take a week off and go somewhere where I can think.

I knocked on their door and was asked to enter. I told them my situation and what my dad suggested and they agreed. They told me that I could have time off next week when things are a bit quieter but the following week is when some of our court cases start. I needed to be back so I can get familiar with the cases Jazz and I are working on. I'll let dad know to keep Tanya busy at work so I can slip away next week. We have all come up with a plan that I would be out of town for work and Aro, Caius and Jazz will all back me up. This will give me time to think.

* * *

**_Thank you for staying with me on this unusual journey, where the plot changes everyday. _**

_**Please review... i would love to hear your thoughts about how the story is going. **_

**_I am trying to update as soon as I possibly can. Gets hard with parties to organise and 3 kids to look after. _**

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	3. New Friendships

**BPOV**

I quickly rang Jasper to let him know that my schedule was free this weekend so that we can catch up at the Jazz club again. He told me to bring Alice and he will bring his friend Edward as well. We agreed to meet on Saturday at 7pm for dinner first.

I was going through the file Dr Cullen had given me so I could get a feel for what I need to do for the VIP patient coming in. I had about 15 minutes to gather my thoughts and all the information I needed. Opening the file I immediately noticed that Rosalie was Dr Cullen's daughter. I had to make sure I didn't screw this one up. Especially not on my first day! I heard someone arrive at the nurse's station and decided to get up and check if everything was ready in the examination room. I headed out to the hallway and glanced at a couple who were in awe of each other. It was nice to see that her partner was taking so much care of her.

"Ok E, I'll see you soon" was all I heard from the conversation they were having. He then left towards the lifts. One quick glance at this man took my breath away, he was beautiful in a sense that his aura allowed him to glow under the fluorescent hospital lights. But then realised that he was taken and he was indeed Dr Cullen's son-in-law. I had to keep my head in check. Rosalie was more important at the moment.

"Rosalie is in the waiting room" Jessica enthusiastically told me.

I walked to the waiting room and called her. She looked beautiful, like she could be one of Alice's models. She had long blonde wavy hair that hung over her shoulders and had piercing blue eyes. _Mental note, ask Ali if she needs a model._ I showed Rosalie into the examination room and introduced myself. I didn't have any other appointments after I saw Rosalie so I decided to try to make her feel as comfortable as I can. She is the Chief's daughter after all! Have to make a good impression at least. She looked a bit apprehensive. I guess she didn't know who I was and what I was like. But I pride myself in having a great bedside manner.

"Just have to do a routine exam and then we could see if we can hear the baby's heartbeat." I smiled to reassure her that I did know what I was doing.

"That's fine. It would be good to hear the heartbeat. Are you new here? I don't think I have ever seen you around here before." She wore a look of intense curiosity which I felt obliged to respond to.

"Yeah, this is my first day at this hospital. I have just moved here and got lucky in finding a job here." I started to take her blood pressure and there was a pained silence in the room. "So, Rosalie, how did you ad Emmett meet? I read your file that's how I know your partners name."

She looked shocked that I would ask such a question and so immediately apologised. She reassured me that there was no harm done.

"Emmett and I met at the grocery store near where we both lived at the time. I was doing my daily grocery shop and he was buying a slab of beer. He let me go in front of him in the line. I happened to be a couple of dollars short in paying and he gave me the money. I was so appreciative that I wanted his number so that I could arrange a time to meet with him to pay him back. He told me that he didn't want the money but to call him anyway. He would like to take me out for dinner. We seemed to hit it off straight away. Sure there have been a few ups and downs but the makeup sex is great. We have only been dating for about 7 months. I guess we weren't as careful as we thought. But I wouldn't have it any other way. We love each other and it's good when I get my own way. I'll admit that I can be a bit of a bitch when I want to and I tell it like it is. My brother and Emmett don't like it at times."

"Wow! That sounds like something you would see in a movie. Emmett must be such a romantic. Are you both married? I'm only asking because of the surnames in the file. You don't have to tell me. "

"No we aren't married, but we are engaged. I really don't want to get married until after the baby is born. I know we are doing things the wrong way around but I love the way things are at the moment. It's just a piece of paper that says we can live together in the eyes of religion. And I guess government. How about you Isabella? Are you married?"

"Bella please! It sounds so formal. No I'm not married and because I have been studying a lot I really haven't had the time for a meaningful relationship. Plus, I have just moved here from Forks and wanted to make a fresh start. Too many bad memories there. Let's see if we can hear the heartbeat. Can you just lift your top up a bit and the gel might feel a little cold." I shook the gel bottle and squirted some gel on her tummy.

We were silent for a while and I started to put the wand on her belly searching for the heartbeat. After what seemed like an eternity, I found the heartbeat. As soon as we heard the thump, thump of the baby's heart I looked over to Rosalie, and she was smiling. I caught a glimpse of a tear rolling down her cheek. These are the moments I love my career choice. I know that I want to have children someday but I can't see it happening yet. I am only 24 and still yet to experience love in all its glory. I would love to have a relationship like Rosalie's. They obviously love each other immensely. Actually, come to think of it, where is Emmett? I saw him go into the lift, but hasn't come back. He probably doesn't like this type of stuff.

I wiped the gel off her belly. "Ok you can sit up, now. What do you do for work?" I hoped that she didn't think that I was prying into her life. I was genuinely interested.

Emmett is really good with cars and the electrics in cars. He actually owns his own business installing car stereos. I am a model but I haven't been able to work much since I got pregnant. Morning sickness and all. The company wants me to do photo shoots for maternity wear as I get bigger and I can still do the catwalk if I wanted to. I really do want to. Do you think I could continue my modelling?"

"I'm sure it would be ok, just need to take it easy though. If you feel like you can't cope, rest up or give me a call and I can schedule an appointment to check you out. Only you know how you feel. Everything seems normal. It's going along according to plan. I think you should make another appointment for 2 weeks and we can give you an ultrasound to check that the little mite is growing strong. The heartbeat is strong but it would be good to see him/her. Would that be ok?" I liked Rosalie and was interested in her life as the daughter of the hospital chief. She nodded in agreement and I walked her to the nurses' station and asked Jessica to arrange another appointment for Rosalie for 2 weeks time. I walked her to the waiting room as she mentioned that E would be waiting for her there.

"Please call me Rose, like you Rosalie is too formal. Thank you and see you in 2 weeks." I smiled and turned to head back to clean the exam room when I caught a glimpse of this god like creature standing to meet Rose at the doorway. OMG! I have never seen anyone like him. She was so lucky to have found someone like him. He had copper tipped hair that looked dishevelled. He ran his hand through his hair which made him look that more irresistible. He had gorgeous green eyes. His square jaw complimented his facial features. I had to walk away because I would be having lust filled dreams about my patient's fiancé. Not a good start Bella! He actually was dressed in an expensive looking suit... not at all like someone who works with cars.

_Beep... Beep... Beep... Beep..._

I jumped not expecting to hear my pager go off and look at it. Great, just been called to the chief's office. At least I can close my jaw and get back to work. So, I got into the lifts and pressed the button heading to the 6th floor again. I wonder what Dr Cullen wants. I couldn't have done anything wrong already.

The lift doors open and I walked to Dr Cullen's door. I knocked softly not sure if he would hear it. Seeing as though I could just hear the knock and I did it.

"Come in" the sound of his voice seemed a lot calmer than when I first heard it this morning. I opened the door and walked into the office, closing the door softly behind me.

"Ah, Bella I have found your id pass. I need you to go to security with this pass and get your photo taken and put on the pass. That way you won't have any problems getting in and out of the hospital and its secured areas. Security is on the ground floor. Has Rosalie come in yet?"

"Thank you Dr. Cullen. And yes, she came in earlier. I had just finished examining her when you paged me. She is a very lovely lady. And I understand why you called her your VIP patient. She is your daughter, isn't she? I noticed the surname when I was looking through her file before she came in. I wanted to make sure that I know at what stage her examination would be at. I have arranged that she come back in 2 weeks for an ultrasound. Just making sure that the baby is developing as it should be and to get a due date." I was hoping that he would see that he had made the right choice hiring me and that I would look after his daughter well.

"Thank you Bella, and please call me Carlisle. You have done a wonderful job and I'm sure you have given her more information than some of the other nurses here. She was worried that she wouldn't feel comfortable coming here because of the lack of information that she was being given. I asked you to see her so that I can gauge how different you work to the others that are here. Good job!"

I felt the heat fill my face and my blush consume me. I didn't want to blush in front of my boss. It's good that he thinks so highly of me. It felt great to get such good feedback seeing as though my parents are too wrapped up in their lives to consider my choices in life and give me any sort of positive feedback. I failed them once and they can't seem to accept my new found profession.

"Thank you Carlisle. I promise that Rosalie is my main priority. If you have anything else for me to do, let me know. I would be glad to help. I'm just going to duck out and get some lunch before my next appointment. Did you want anything while I'm out?" I thought I had better offer so that he doesn't think that I am rude. This is my first day after all and a little sucking up won't hurt.

"No thank you Bella, I ate lunch with my son this afternoon when he came in. Go ahead and once you have finished your appointments today and there aren't any emergencies, you can go home. It's your first day and I have overloaded you with information. You should rest for tomorrow. That is when your crazy hours start." Oh so that's where he went when I saw him leave Rose.

"Thank you again. See you tomorrow then."

"Bye Bella"

I smiled at him and turned to leave his office. The day seemed to fly by after lunch and after my last patient I tidied up in the examination rooms and finished writing notes in all my patient files and put them away before I went home.

I walked in our apartment and was surprised to see Alice home so early. I thought she would have long days like me because she is under a deadline. Alice works for Kiko House of Couture designing new and chic bridal and formal wear.

"How was your first day?" we asked is unison. Laughing and giving each other a hug. We both had really good first day's and are were really excited to be making a good start for ourselves.

"Hey Alice, I spoke to Jasper today and organised to meet him and his friend Edward on Saturday for dinner at 7pm. Is that cool with you? I can't believe that we met Jasper a couple of days ago and we have been asked out to dinner with him and his friend. I hope we will have a good friendship with these guys. It would be good to actually know some people in this town and not feel like the newbie's." I was pretty much dancing around Alice telling her this. I was so excited to have potential friends that we could hang around with most weekends.

"That's cool. How exciting to get dinner plans for the next weekend. Now to figure out what to wear! I'll do some shopping and see what I can pull together for us." Alice was just as excited as me.

"Oh Ali, I forgot to ask, do you need any models? I have a patient who is absolutely gorgeous and she is a model. She has been told that because she is pregnant that she will have to take a step back from the modelling but can do the catwalks if she wanted. I was thinking that because some women are pregnant when they get married that you could design something for them and she can model them for you. What do you think?"

"What a fantastic idea. Let me run it by Jane and see what she says and I will get back to you. Is she coming back soon to see you?" I could see that Alice's brain was working overtime. I could imagine that she was picturing what kind of dresses she could design.

"She is coming back in 2 weeks but she is my boss's daughter and I am sure that I can talk to him about it if Jane is interested."

Alice was jumping up and down clapping her hands in excitement. It was funny to see.

The rest of the week seemed to go by slowly. There weren't any real emergencies at work which I found strange for a maternity ward but I wasn't complaining. I seemed to make it home at a reasonable time every night. As Saturday was closing in, I was starting to get nervous about seeing jasper and his friend Edward. I was sure that Edward was getting married. I started over thinking things quite a bit and was wondering why he would ask his friend, who is supposed to be getting married, to come out with us. Two single ladies who just want to have a good time and chill. But still enjoy our jobs in the process.

As promised, Alice had organised our clothing for the night. She was getting excited about going out again. The pampering had started at 3pm. We jumped into our respective showers and washed our hair. As I got out of the bathroom, I saw Alice had laid out a gorgeous deep purple floor length maxi dress with beading under the bust and over the collar on my bed.

I suddenly felt ridiculous getting this dressed up for a dinner with Jasper and his friend. I tried to push the thought to the back of my mind and head back into the bathroom to apply my make up and do my hair in a way that would compliment that dress. I swept my hair to a low ponytail to the side. I put the dress on which rested just above my ankles and contemplated as to what shoes I would wear. I didn't have much fashion sense and relied heavily on Alice for that. I thought she would have found a pair of shoes for me to put on as well. I looked around my room and couldn't see any shoes about anywhere.

As if Alice could read my mind or could hear my movements she called across the hall to me. "Hey Bella, I couldn't find those strappy black sandals you wore last week, wear them with this dress. And make sure you have a nice black clutch purse to go with it. You will also need jewellery. Go with white gold or silver.

I did as she asked and as I made my way to the stairs I saw Alice coming out of her room. She was wearing a knee length charcoal tight fitting skirt with a red ¾ length sleeve shirt that had a black satin tie around the waist. She looked stunning. Even though Alice didn't have the money to go shopping, she made what she had in her wardrobe look fantastic with the right accessories. Or so she says.

I noticed that she didn't have heels on and I chastised her for that. "Alice if you can wear ballet flats then so can I! I refuse to look more dressed up than you. You look absolutely gorgeous too by the way!"

"Fine but make sure it works. You look great, I love what you have done with your hair and makeup. You have the smoky eyes look." She had this big smile across her face. She was obviously excited to be going out for dinner. It was going on 6.30pm and after I changed into my own very cute comfortable balet flats Alice and I had decided to walk to the restaurant. We knew it would be about a 20 minute walk and because it was a really nice night, we decided to take a leisurely stroll.

We linked our arms as we walked through the streets of Seattle and talked about everything. Alice mentioned that she had spoken to Jane and that she was all for having a pregnant woman model a range of wedding gowns and formal wear. Especially if it was Rosalie Cullen, apparently she has a good reputation and is well sought after.

We arrived at Dimitrious Jazz Alley and seeing as though we were early we headed to the bar and sat at the bar and ordered drinks. We waited for about 5 mins before the guys came in. I saw jasper first and smiled over at him. Then it hit me, when I saw who was behind him. I was gobsmacked!

Oh. My. God!_ He isn't Rose's fiancé. But he is getting married. How does he know Rose though? But she called him E at the hospital_. I couldn't stop all these thoughts from swirling around my head. I needed answers but in a subtle way. Fuck. What am I thinking? I need to stop obsessing. Even though I think he is the most beautiful man in the world.

"Hi guys, how are you?" Both Alice and I chimed in at the same time. We sounded upbeat even though I was desperate to find answers to my unanswered questions.

"We're fine thanks. How about you two?" Jasper asked on behalf of Edward.

"Yeah good, so shall we find our table?" I thought to ask to go to the table so that we can chat on an even level. There would be no loud distractions and we could actually have a better conversation than just pleasantries.

We walked to the restaurant and Jasper informed him that we had a booking and he ushered us inside to our table. It was nice. We were basically in a corner towards the back of the restaurant where we could talk privately and it seemed less noisy there.

We looked over the menus and ordered our food. We chatted mindlessly about our jobs and how our week was.

I thought I built up enough courage to ask the question to my thoughts but once I started I wasn't sure if it was a good thing or not. "So Edward... I recognise you from the hospital. Did you come in this week?" I thought I might start slow and build up to my impending questions that won't leave my head.

"Yeah, I came in. How could you recognise me? I don't think we had actually been introduced." His question was very evasive. Did he want to avoid my questions? It sounded like there was some unwanted sarcasm in his voice.

I pushed his tone aside. "I saw you drop off and pick up one of my patients. Now that I know your name, I am sure you aren't her fiancé. She called you E at the time. I was only curious and wanted to make conversation. No harm intended." _Don't bite my head off. Fuck. I was only asking. _

"Sorry. But I wasn't in a good frame of mind that day I took Rose to the hospital. She is my sister and no I definitely am not Emmett. Seeing as though you were curious, can I ask you something?"

"Sure!" I didn't know how to read him but there seemed to some unanswered questions that he wanted to know.

"Do all the nurses get together and talk about each other's partners/boyfriends /husbands etc?" There was a little hint of horror in his eyes. They were wide in expectation of my answer as if it was detrimental to get this answer from me.

I had to choose my tone and words wisely, from the look he was giving me. I didn't know what his reaction would be once all was said and done. "To be honest Edward, I have heard the girls talking about boyfriends and who they are dating. But I haven't taken much notice because I am not classed as..." I put my hands in the air and mimicked quotation marks with my fingers," 'one of the girls'. As soon as I come near them they are quiet. I have only heard bits and pieces but not enough to piece anything together. I am actually a midwife and am too busy attending to patients to delve into that kind of childish nonsense. Sometimes I think I am working with teenagers. They go all mushy and giggle a lot. And I mean a lot. It even gets distracting. But I'm only new and I don't intend to rock the boat. I need to have a good working relationship with these girls because they are the ones that have my back when its needed." I saw the startled look on his face. I don't think he was expecting that kind of explanation but it happened. And I can't go back on that now.

OMG I just realised that if he is Rose's brother than he is carlisles son. What have I gone and said. Let's see if I have a job on Monday. How can I be complaining a bit to someone that will go running to daddy and tell him everything? Hopefully he won't. Need to get some air...

"It's getting a bit stuffy in here, I'm just going to get some air. I will back in 5." I got up from the table and walked outside.

I didn't hear anyone walking behind me and had a shock when I turned around once I got outside and saw Jasper hot on my heels. I jumped and he laughed nervously. "Sorry, didn't mean to scare you! Are you ok?" I could hear the sincerity in his voice.

"Yeah fine, it was getting stuffy in there and needed to get some air. Like I said! No need to worry, go back inside, and have fun. I'll be back in a minute."

"Bella, do you mind if I stay with you? I just want to make sure you are ok!" there was a hint of concern in his voice. His eyes looked at me with a gleam in them. They were smiling.

I didn't think that I did anything to make people worry about me but obviously I did. It was nice to have company but didn't need it. "That's cool with me." Once those words parted from my lips, Jasper was smiling from ear to ear.

Jasper wanted to know about my life and family. I wasn't willing to share a lot with him because there was a lot I didn't want anyone to know. Some of it Alice didn't know and she is my best friend. If I couldn't tell Alice, I wasn't going to tell Jasper. This secret is something that I would have to take to the grave with me. Absolutely no one could know.

Before I knew what was happening, jasper was leaning in towards me and started kissing me. I stood there wide eyed and not even moving my mouth. Jasper must have felt my hesitation and pulled away. OMG! What just happened?

"I'm sorry Bella, I thought it would be a good opportunity to kiss you. Your mouth is so luscious and you are beautiful. I feel that after our chat that you wouldn't mind me kissing you." I was shaking my head in disbelief but Jasper took it as that I didn't mind. He leaned in again to kiss me and I just went with it this time. His lips were soft and inviting and he tasted so good. He parted his lips a little to hint that I should do the same. I didn't really want to open my mouth to grant his tongue access. I wasn't ready for that. We stayed there for what seemed like a minute kissing each other when I heard a gasp!

I pulled my head back quickly to get a glimpse of Alice darting back inside. I knew letting jasper kiss me was a bad idea. Letting him misinterpret my gestures like that. Not cool Bella!

I ran in after Alice and followed her into the ladies room. She was red with surprise. "I'm sorry Bella I didn't mean to interrupt. I just thought I should check on you because you have been out there for a while."

"It's ok Alice, it was nothing anyway! Actually I don't even know how that kiss happened." She looked stunned.

"What do you mean? Oh never mind, lets go back out there and enjoy the rest of the night with the guys." We went back out to the restaurant and decided to go and dance. Not a good idea for the unco-ordinated. But I attempted it and it was fine. Until the dreaded phone call came!


	4. Unexplained Anguish

**A/N - **Thank you very much to Eddzie for betaing this chapter. You are my life saviour by reading my story and editing it. You do an amazing job to make my story pretty.

Thank you to everyone that is reading my story. This chapter has taken a while to complete because i needed inspiration and i was forced to listen to Taylor Swift by my 5 year old daughter. I liked a lot of her songs and they me the inspriation i needed to complete this chapter. Then i had to go and feel all uncomfortable about it and re-do it by adding BPOV rather than the whole chapter being APOV.

Things and circumstances change a lot with each chapter i write and it is hard to keep the characters where i wanted them in the beginning. I have thrown my plan out of the window and i am letting the characters take me on this ride and not the other way around.

I hope you enjoy this chapter and please share the love and leave a review. It would be good to know what you like and don't like about the story. :)

_**BPOV**_

Alice excused herself so that she could take a phone call. I watched her as her expressions changed from worry to shock to on the verge of tears upset. Once she was off the phone I pretty much ran to her without giving the guys an explanation as to what was going on. I gave Alice a hug and asked her what happened. She told me that Billy called her. I knew just from that comment that this was not good. He doesn't call unless there is something important. The only other times is when Alice has had too much to drink and calls him out of the blue and slurs something down the phone. He would call the next day to find out what she said and wanted. Usually Alice doesn't know what she said or better yet that she actually called.

"Billy called! What's wrong?" I was concerned because with the look on Alice's face at the moment, it wasn't good.

Just as she was about to reply, Edward and Jasper came rushing beside us. "Billy told me that Jake has been in a serious car accident. He was on his way home from the beach and the other driver was driving on the wrong side of the road. Jake didn't have time to move out of the way because it happened on a bend. He got hit head on and is in the hospital. Oh My God Bella, what am I going to do? I need to see him! He is the closest thing to a brother that I have and I...c...can't...lose...him." She was crying into my shoulders by this time and all I could do was embrace her tightly and get my emotions into check. I think of Jake as a brother I never had. Sometimes I think there is more there but I would never tell him or Alice because I love them too much to lose them as my bestest friends.

"I'll come with you to see him. I will have to let my boss know and then we can leave. Have you let Jane know?" she nodded as that was the only coherent response I was going to receive from her today.

"That's cool Bella, I will let my dad know. You need to get Alice home and get a good night's sleep. Here is my number, let me know how it all goes. I have time off owing to me and if you need me to be there, I will. Whether it is for legal reasons or just as a friend. Where are you going anyway?" Edward's concerned look was genuine. Jasper looked on with his mouth gaping open. He looked lost for words. It was so nice of Edward to let Carlisle know that I needed to go back home and to offer his support. We didn't know what we were going to see when we got back.

"We have to go back to Forks. My parents live just outside of town and Alice lives on the Quileute reservation. To be honest I was hoping I didn't have to make this trip for a while but under the circumstances I have to. I'll see how Jake is before I call you is that ok? And thank you for calling Carlisle for me but I will need to speak to him personally though. I'm sure he would appreciate that more. Do you have his cell number?" I was grateful for Edward's sudden enthusiasm to help me but I needed to do this. I don't think Carlisle would appreciate a phone call from his son telling him I can't go to work. What would he think?

'Believe me Bella, he won't mind. I will tell him... he will understand. This is his number so that you can call him when you find out information about Alice's brother." I nodded slowly and sadly in appreciation. As we were about to leave, Edward spoke again, "can I ask you something Bella? What did Alice mean when she said that Jake was the closest thing to a brother that she has? I don't get it. She doesn't look like a Quileute either. She is quite pale to be living on the res."

"Alice was adopted when she was a baby. Billy and Sue hadn't had Jake yet but they were having problems conceiving and they adopted Alice. A year later they had Jacob. Sorry Edward I think I should get Alice home." I gave Edward a kiss on the cheek and felt an instant spark and heat. My God he smells good. What is wrong with me? Fuck I have never had this feeling when I've kissed someone on the cheek before. I quickly kissed Jasper on the cheek as well and left.

Once I got through our front door, Alice broke down and started crying. I held onto her trying to comfort her. "Why do these fucking things always happen to me? I know Jake isn't my real brother but I still love him like one. He has always treated me like his real sister and... and... I just love him!" Alice was now crying uncontrollably into my shoulder.

"Shhh! Shhh! It's going to be ok Alice. Don't cry. We will go back to Forks tomorrow and then we will see for ourselves how bad Jake really is. We will get through this and we will help him through this as well. I promise it will all be ok!" I was trying to be comforting and reassuring but inside I was screaming and panicking. For her sake I was hoping that he would be fine.

We packed our bags and had them ready at the front door.

I went to bed thinking about Jake and what he may look like when we arrive tomorrow. But somewhere in my thoughts Edward's face popped up. My heart pounded profusely and after remembering the feeling of warmth and sparks that I felt with just a chaste kiss, made my girlie parts wet. Fuck me! I think I may need to get my vibrator out of its packaging. I got a rabbit from my dear friend Leah as a parting gift. She knew that I wasn't seeing anyone and had no intentions of seeing anyone in the near future. She knew that things ended really badly for me and Sam. Yeah, Sam and I had dated for a while. He was my first and to say that it didn't hurt is an understatement. I knew he was only with me so that he could make Emily jealous but it felt good to be in someone's arms. I thought I truly loved him. I was mistaken about that. Now that my thoughts went to Sam it was a major passion killer. When will I ever let his image and his touch flee my mind? The truth is I can't. I have a tie to him that can't be untied. He will always be a part of my mind. And me for that matter.

We both got as good a night's sleep as we could have. I got up early and showered dressed and made some breakfast. I thought that if I make a nice breakfast for Alice it may cheer her up a bit. Also I didn't know when we would eat again today seeing as though it's going to be a long day...for me anyway!

_Why am I doing this to myself? I only just left that place and I'm forced to go back. Not forced but out of an obligation to my friends._

_God, I know I don't pray a lot and I'm not religious but please be with me while I'm there and help me to be strong. I can't see him. Not yet. Please help me sort through my feelings. Help be to find peace with everything._

"A penny for your thoughts..." I jumped unaware that Alice was even standing there. I was too busy in my silent prayers to hear her come into the kitchen.

"Oh, hey babe, just thinking about Jacob. How you feeling? I made some breakfast because I didn't know how long it would be before we ate again. To be entirely honestly Ali, I'm worried about going back. I don't know if I could stay at my parent's house. I haven't told them that I am coming so I may get away with staying at a motel. I left Forks for a very good reason and I am really scared to go back." My voice started to crack as the tears welled in my eyes.

"I'm ok I guess! What's happened? Why can't you see your folks? I... um... actually... kind of mentioned to dad that you would most likely be coming with me. Sorry!" There was a hint of concern in her voice but I think she was more inquisitive to find out what was going on. How can I tell my best friend my deepest darkest secret and not have her judge me like my parents did. This was so hard already. But now I feel like there is added pressure on me to tell her everything. This is something I can't do at the moment.

"A lot of things happened Alice, one of them really major between my parents and I and it's something I'm not sure I want to relive in a hurry. It is really hard to talk about at the moment. Please don't be mad!" I was hoping that she wouldn't press the issue. I looked away from her so that she couldn't see the hurt and sadness that filled my every being.

"But Bella, we have never kept secrets from each other..." she was pleading with me now._ How can I do this to her and not tell her anything. _

"Please Alice... not now. I can't talk about it. Too many painful memories. I'll tell you when I can but please be patient with me." I was holding back my tears afraid that she wouldn't let this go. But it was true... I needed time.

We finished our breakfast and cleaned up quickly before we took our bags out to the car. We had decided to take my car as it would most likely make it to Forks and back again. Alice's on the other hand we're not so sure about.

Alice looked as though there was something going through her mind. I put it down to Jacob and the unknown of what is awaiting us in Forks.

About 30 mins into our 3 hour drive Alice decided she wanted to talk. "Bella, what's the deal with you and Jasper?"

"Honestly Ali, nothing!" I was shocked as this was the last thing I thought she would be asking about.

"It didn't look like that last night. Come on Bella, at least be upfront with me". Alice actually sounded pissed. What the fuck?

"Seriously Alice! Why are you asking me about something so stupid when your brother's in hospital? If you must know, I went out for a smoke and fresh air and Jasper came up behind me. We were just talking when he kissed me. I didn't kiss him back. Geez... I'm supposed to be your fucking friend and you are accusing me of shit and something I didn't do." I was seriously getting irritated. Why was she thinking about Jasper when Jake is in a hospital bed with unknown amount of injuries? Because we weren't told much and this is what she thinks about?

"I AM your friend and I saw you kiss Jasper before we left last night. But this isn't the first time you have done this to me. You did this before with Sam. What was with that? You freaked the fuck out or some shit and we didn't see you for like a year. Then when you come back, you were like determined to leave Forks. I know something really big happened because that's all you would tell me. But come on... where did you go for that whole year? What happened with Sam? While you were away Sam met Emily and got married within a few months and then we found out that she had a baby. Is that why you left? Talk to me Bella."

"I'm not into Jasper OK? I gave both Edward and Jasper a kiss on the cheek before I left and for your information I like Edward. He is very intellectual and we had a great conversation." I didn't want to tell her about the spark I felt... not just yet. Not when she was on this ridiculous rampage. "He has great looks to go with it but the downfall is that he is engaged already. I'm sorry if you think that I am a slut or something for Jasper kissing me I didn't start it but I sure as hell finished it. And why are you so pissed off anyway? You didn't tell me that you liked Jasper. I'm not a fucking mind reader I don't have ESP and I can't see the future. If I did have any of those things, don't you think I would have stopped him before it all happened and then you wouldn't be all up in my shit because of something that I didn't initiate? And FYI Alice, there are a lot of things that happened between Sam and I that I don't particularly want to tell you about. Just be thankful you didn't date Sam. Yeah he was fucking gorgeous with his toned abs and six pack but what we saw on the outside was completely different to what he was really like. He was like an animal and treated me like one too. I was his prized possession. So shut the fuck up about Sam Please! Are you satisfied?" The anger just flew out of me by this stage. I immediately felt guilty but she was hurting me at the same time. Making me think about things I didn't want to.

"Yes, why are you so fucking pissed anyway? Why don't you want to go back home? What happened with your parents?" Alice seemed to calm down a bit but still asking inappropriate questions.

"I can't tell you Alice. I can't answer your questions just yet. Stop asking me the same questions. I have told you already that I can't talk about it just yet. Leave. It. Be! I c...can't d...do this! Please don't... I need time!" The tears were streaming down my face. She fucking broke me.

_**APOV**_

I contemplated telling Bella to pull over and giving her a hug as most of my anger subsided. Something huge happened and I needed to find out but also needed to be patient with her. I just let her continue driving with her blurred vision from her tears.

Seemingly defeated I could barely hear her say that she had saved me the day she went out with Sam. What's the deal there? Couldn't press too much with her emotional torrent and I didn't want to get into an accident on the road. So I left it... For now!

We arrived at Forks and we went to my place. She wanted to come in but as she looked around at all the cars parked in front, she said that she was going to have to face her parents soon. She may as well do it now and that she would pick me up in an hour to go and see Jake.

I went inside hugging everyone and saying hello to all my friends and family. Then it dawned on me why Bella left. Sam was here with Emily and their daughter Maddy. She looked so much like Sam. She had gorgeous chocolate brown eyes and brown wavy hair. She had an air of confidence around her and she was only 5 years old.

"Hey dad, how's Jake?" I anticipated his response because I feared the worst. They had led me to believe that he was pretty much knocking on deaths door.

"He is doing well, the doctors told us this morning. Visiting hours won't start again for another hour or so. I though you said that Bella was coming with you?" I noticed him glance around the room to see if she was behind me somewhere.

"Yeah, she came but wanted to go home and freshen up and see her folks before we go and see Jake. Why, is there anything wrong?" The look of shock on his face wasn't hard to read... he didn't know how to mask his facial expressions well.

"I guess she will find out sooner rather than later. Charlie and Renee kind of asked if I could keep Bella here for a while before she goes back home. It's ok though... don't look like that. Everything will be ok." Damn he saw that flash of shock that came upon my face although I tried really hard to mask it. That's all Bella needs... more arguments or bad news.

How was I supposed to take that? So I went to my room and unpacked and freshened up to go and see Jake. Bella didn't show up when she said she would. I was starting to worry about her. I was a little upset with her still because she didn't fully answer my questions. Hopefully in time she would. I rang her phone but it rang out and went to voicemail...

_Bella it's Alice, Is everything ok? I got a little worried when you didn't show up. Are you still coming to get me so we can see Jake? I'm sure he would like to see you again. He has always regarded you as another sister. Call me please when you get this!_

While I waited for Bella to call back or show up, I started telling mum and dad all about my new job in the city and all about Edward and Jasper. I told them a little about the hospital Bella works at and that Edward is her boss' son. After another hour passed by, I was really getting worried. I tried her phone again but this time it went straight to voicemail...

_Fuck Bella, where are you? What's happened? If you don't call me in the next 10 minutes I am calling your parents. Call me please?_

I was fucking begging on the phone. Why did she turn her phone off? After 10 minutes passed I called her parents. Charlie answered sounding like he had laryngitis. His voice was hoarse like he had either been crying or yelling lots.

"Hey Charlie, its Alice. I was wondering if Bella was there. She was supposed to come back about 2 hours ago now and her phone is off and she won't call me back." My plea came out as though Bella had been missing for a few days and I was begging for information as to my friend's whereabouts.

"Sorry Alice, Bella left about an hour and a half ago. She said that she was going to check on Jake and then check into a motel. Things have happened in the past and present that no one here is happy about and I think us all being around each other is making everything worse." Wow... Charlie offered more than Bella ever would and it was all cryptic. There was still the problem of the missing Bella.

"Do you think that she is ok though? I mean she wouldn't hurt herself? She has been weird today when we were driving and crying and shit. Please tell me something. I need to know where she is!" I was starting to get a bit panicky and I needed to know what's going on. I didn't want to have to deal with Bella hurting herself... not today anyway.

"I can't get into it all with you Alice. It would be up to Bella what and whom she told. All she told me was that she was going to see Jacob and then check into a motel. She doesn't want to stay here. If you find her can you please tell her that she needs to come home so that we can talk about everything, have to go now Alice. Bye" Charlie didn't wait for my greeting and hung up the phone. I stood in my room for what seemed like an eternity but was merely a couple of minutes. I was stunned... where is Bella?

I told Billy everything that transpired between Charlie and me and asked if there is anything that he knows about as to why Bella would have these feelings about coming home. Billy told me that he didn't know what was going on. But his expressions told me otherwise. I knew with all these people here that he couldn't tell me anything. I asked to borrow his car so that I could see Jake while I figure out what to do about Bella.

Before I entered the hospital I quickly tried Bella's phone again but again it went to voicemail. I turned my phone on silent and went to Jake's room.

As I entered the door, I saw Jacob's head jerk towards me and put his index finger against his lips motioning for me to be quiet. I fully opened the door and my eyes widened in surprise to see Bella lying on his bed with his arm around her. She looked defeated even in her sleep. I really wanted to know what was going on with her.

I looked Jake over and saw that his head had been bandaged and also that he had his left leg in a cast. There was a look of pain contorting his face as his slight hand gestures seemed painful.

"Jake, how are you? What's Bella doing here asleep?" I was frantic with worry and tried to keep my voice low as Jake had asked.

"I'm ok... I'm on the mend. Have a concussion, contusions on my head, broke my left leg and have a few cracked ribs. It hurts to talk and breathe but I'm alive. Bella thought that you would find her here. She said something about not picking you up because she couldn't do it anymore and she needed space away from everyone and everything. I tried to ask her what was going on but she just started crying and curled up next to me and cried herself to sleep. I honestly don't know what is going on. Do you know what's wrong? She has me really worried." Jake grimaced in pain as the effort it took for him to talk was hurting his chest. He held onto his chest with his free hand.

I shrugged my shoulders waiting for her to wake up so that we could talk about what is going on. Jake and I chatted quietly and I tried to get him to stop talking for a while as it was evident that he was in a lot of pain. Even though it had only been a week since we saw each other, it felt like an eternity away from him. We are best friends and I love talking to him and spending time with him. Bella felt like we are the family she never had. Being an only child, she turned to us and now has the sister and brother she has always wanted.

Bella started to stir and as her eyes fluttered open, when she realised where she was. She panicked a bit and as she pushed herself up, she leaned on Jacob's chest and he hissed and winced in pain. "Oh, fuck, sorry Jake. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it... I'm... why do I always fuck things up?" She started crying again and she was going to leave. I jumped off my seat and blocked the door. I pleaded with her to stay and talk about it. She conceded and sat down on the couch across from Jake's bed. She looked down and took the bottom lip into her mouth. She was clearly upset and nervous at the same time. I had to wait for her to start. She needed to feel like she was in control of the situation.

"Sorry Alice, I didn't mean not to pick you up. I needed to get out of the house and I couldn't come to your place. I have fucked up really bad and they won't forgive me and I saw Sam's car at your house and I can't see him. I'm not ready. I left Forks for really good reasons and I didn't expect to come back this soon. But I needed to see you Jake and make sure that you were ok. I couldn't let pixie over here drive by herself." She lightened the tone a bit and tried to smile but it didn't reach her eyes. I did notice her giving Jacob a knowing look. I wonder if he knows more than he is letting on.

"Bella, your dad asked me to tell you to go back home and talk about everything. He didn't tell me anything and neither are you so I am still in the dark as to what is going on. We are supposed to be best friends, can't you tell me anything so that we can help you. Please... Please... we can't stand to see you like this. Please Bella... anything!" I felt the need to reiterate that we were indeed her friends and am here to help and not judge her for her past. Whatever that may be!

"I can't go back there just yet. I can't tell you what's going on until I can sort through my feelings about this whole situation. I just need to go... I need to sleep. I will be staying in Port Angeles until we are ready to go back home..."

"...but this is your home" Jacob and I practically screamed at her in unison.

"...no I mean that Seattle is my home now. I don't want to come back to Forks unless I really have to. I can't be here with the expectation that I may bump into Sam. He hurt me really bad and I had to leave. That's why I went to Phoenix with my mom for a year. I couldn't be anywhere near him. That's pretty much why I left your house in a hurry when I dropped you off. Please don't ask for more of an explanation because I can't go into details with you guys. I need time to absorb everything that has happened and things that have recently happened and... and... I just need time!" Her sobs were uncontrollable. I scurried over to her and wrap her up in my arms. I know I am still angry at her but I can't continue or argument with her feeling like shit. I needed answers but not when she is like this and not willing to give me anymore until she is ready.

"Sorry Jake, Alice. But I need to get out of here. I will be back soon. Ali, can you at least give me the heads up if Sam or my folks are here? I can't be near them. Not yet anyway. Thanks guys I'll talk to you later. Take care Jake!" And with a swift kiss on both our cheeks she left.

"What do you think that was all about? I have never seen her like this? Do you know what happened between her and Sam?" All my questions seemed to come at once.

"Sorry sis, but I have no idea what is going on. The only time I have seen her like this was when she came back from Phoenix that year she was away. Sam hasn't mentioned anything to me about their relationship and what happened when they broke up. Your guess at the moment is as good as mine. Hey when you go home, can you bring my phone here. I need to keep in touch with the outside world."

"Yeah no worries. I should get back anyway. Mom and dad will be getting worried as to whether their precious car is kept in one piece. I don't have the greatest driving record." Laughing at the thought of my driving and the state of my bomb.

I gave Jacob a kiss on his cheek as before I left and I contemplated on whether I should see Bella, but she said that she needed to be alone. The best thing I could do was warn her when Sam was around I guess. So I went home and the first person I saw was Sam. I couldn't help the barrage of anger that was inside of me. What did he do to Bella? I had to know what was with them.

"What the fuck is up with you and Bella? You have been our friend for years and then all of a sudden Bella can't be anywhere near you. Tell me what went down with you two because she is a mess. She doesn't even want to call Forks her home anymore and she refuses to see her parents. What did you do to her? Because whatever you did, fucked her up big time!"

Sam was wide eyed in shock as he attempted to answer me. He was very calm when he responded to me. "Yes Alice, we have been friends for many years so I would appreciate it if you wouldn't swear in front of Maddy and Emily. Please give them the respect they deserve. Also if Bella hasn't told you anything about what happened what makes you think that I would. That is between us. And as far as her parents are concerned and how she feels about Forks... she has her own reasoning's about it and I am not one to make assumptions about it. Now have I cleared everything up or is there something else?"

" Yeah Sam, just one more thing... tell me when you are seeing Jake so that I can tell Bella to either come before or after you visit. She can't be near you. Can you at least do that?"

"Fine, but if I'm still at the hospital when she comes, I'll leave the room. Would that be ok as well?"

"I guess." Turning around to everyone I said my goodnights and went to my room. I tried calling Bella again in the hope that she turned her phone back on and would answer it. Bella's phone was ringing and I was relieved when she answered. I told her about Sam agreeing to not be at the hospital or in Jake's room when she wanted to visit. She cut our conversation short saying that she needed to call Carlisle to let him know what was going on and when she would be back at work. This reminded me to call Jane and do the same.

I got showered and ready for bed and because today was an emotional rollercoaster I was surprised to find it difficult to sleep. I lay in bed thinking about all that had happened today.

I had woken up with a start unaware that I had even fallen into a dreamless sleep. I looked over to the clock and was surprised that I even slept that long. It was 10am and I before I could rub the sleep out of my eyes, my phone rang. It was a number I didn't recognise. I was tempted to ignore the call but I ended up answering it.

"Hello... This is Alice" My voice sounded croaky. It was evident that I had just woken up.

"Hi Alice, This is Jasper. I rang your work and Jane gave me your number. I hope you don't mind. I have tried Bella but her phone is going straight through to voicemail. I wanted to ring you and see how your brother is? Where are you guys anyway?" I couldn't stop the smile that formed on my face. I was glad he rang me.

"Oh hi jasper, how did you get Jane to give you my number. Not that I mind but for an employer it is confidential. Oh but Bella's ok if you could call it that. She is having a hard time being back here. My brother is doing fine too. He is on the mend and I don't think we will be here as long as we thought. Depends on whether he has a turn or not. "I was sad to think that anything bad could happen to Jacob.

"Sorry I kind of told Jane that I was your attorney and needed to contact you about your brother and that we left off your mobile number from the file. Is there anything that I can do for Bella? Where are you guys anyway? Edward is due some time off and we could come to give you guy's moral support if you want." He sounded as if he was deeply concerned about us.

"We are in Forks. Bella is staying at Port Angeles because she can't stay here. She won't tell me why though but I know it has to do with her parents and also her ex boyfriend. I'll try to contact her and ask her if she wants you guys to come here. That's the best I can do. But I'm really worried about her. I'll call you later if that's ok? I really have to get ready and go to the hospital." I was smiling inside to know that he cares enough about us to offer to come here for moral support.

We said our goodbyes and I got ready for the day and went to the kitchen. I was surprised to see Sue and Billy here still. I thought they would be at the hospital already. I could see that Billy wasn't happy about my outburst last night but I wasn't sorry. I needed to go to the hospital and see Jake. I ate quickly and told them I was going to see Jake. We all drove to the hospital in silence. I was about to crack and ask them what their deal was but I kept my mouth shut. I needed to be cool, calm, and collected when I go to see Jake. And Bella!

I walked into Jakes room to see Sam there. I started getting angry because he said that he was going to let me know when he was coming to see Jake.

"Hey Sam, you didn't tell me that you were coming this morning?" It came out more as a question than a statement. Hopefully he will see the underlying question of 'Why not?'

"Yeah we just decided to come. Sorry. If you hear from Bella I will leave the room. It would be nice to see her again though." He smiled in remorse but I secretly think that he did this on purpose to see Bella.

"Well I'll ring her and let her know that you are here. I don't want to cause undue stress on Jacob and have his recovery stalled by us." With that I walked out of the room and almost bumped into Bella. I grabbed her arm before she could open the door to go in. I told her to take a walk for 5 minutes and then come back because I had to get rid of Sam. She nodded sorrowfully and set off.

Going back into the hospital room, I told Sam that he has to go and get something from the cafeteria and that he should be gone for at least an hour. He promised to let me know when he will come back and he and Emily left. He left Maddy to visit her Uncle Jake which I didn't think would do any harm.

When Bella walked into the room and saw Maddy. She froze. It was like she knew that she belonged to Sam. Bella smiled to her as she was on Jake's bed and went to dive Jake a kiss hello. She introduced herself to Maddy as Maddy put her arms out for a hug. Maddy told Bella that she knew who she was because daddy told her that Bella was coming and that she was a friend. Bella looked shocked that Sam would refer to her as a friend. It was nice to see Bella and Maddy converse like adults. They got along and were able to laugh at each other's jokes.

Bella said that she was going to go and get some air after a while and Maddy whispered in her ear and handed her an envelope. Bella said her goodbyes and left. I was going to follow but Jake shook his head to stop me. I ignored him and went outside. What I saw told me that I needed help. She was reading the letter and was crying over it. I needed to talk to Bella. But instead I called Jasper and told him that it would be good for them to come. He said that they would come tomorrow. I just needed to tell Bella. I felt that she needed to have friends around and not just me.

As I approached Bella, she quickly stuffed the letter back into its envelope and put it in her purse. She wiped the tears from her face and tried to look composed.

I gave Bella a sad smile, "Hey babe, you ok?"

"Not really Ali. Can I maybe have a hug? I'm sorry for the fight we had yesterday. I'm sorry for letting Jasper kiss me and for taking you away from your family. I shouldn't have. Seattle was my dream not yours. I might take a few days away from everyone and go back to home." She sniffed in the hope of stopping a dripping nose with no avail.

I wrapped her up in my arms hugging tightly and wanting to give her some sort of comfort. "Don't be silly Bella. I wanted to go with you. I wouldn't have gotten this break with my designs if I was still here. I thank you for that. Don't worry about Jasper. I over reacted and I'm the one that should say sorry because I didn't tell you that I liked him. But I wish I knew what is up with you so that I can help you. Oh, Jasper called me because he couldn't reach you and wanted to see how Jake was. He told me that Edward had time off owing to him and that they wanted to come and see us to give us moral support. I told him that I would ask you but after seeing you cry again, I rang him back to tell them to come. I don't feel right leaving you by yourself. Mom and dad are upset with me because I went off at Sam when I got back from the hospital yesterday. So I kind of need to stay with them to work it out. And make time to see if I can find some information about my real parents."

"That's cool Alice. I need to speak to one of them about a few things. I will tell you about it all when I can get my head around all this new stuff that's been happening. I kind of need advice from someone outside of the friendship circle. I hope you understand. Please don't be mad but I kind of spent the night here with Jake last night. I needed a hug and came here. I fell asleep and he woke me up before anyone came. I just thought you should know." She ran her hand through her hair which she usually does when she is nervous. Was she expecting me to rip into her again?

"Ok! Is there anything going on between you and my brother? I found you in his bed yesterday as well." I was getting annoyed again. Just after I had apologised for my previous assumptions.

"Honestly with everything on my mind, how can you think that anything is going on between me and Jake? I just needed a hug that's all. I need you guys around me at the moment. I'm staying at Port Angeles Inn. I'm going to go now. I'll talk to you soon. Please no more insinuations about my relationships with people. Things will be told when I am able to. Can you please... never mind. Call me when the guys get here. Later Alice." Bella headed to her car with her head pretty much attached to her chest. She looked defeated in every sense of the word.

Just as I was going back into the hospital, Jasper called again. He said that they were leaving and wanted me to stay with Bella. They were deeply concerned because they had spoken to Carlisle and she was showing signs of depression. They wanted to make sure someone is looking after her seeing as though she won't stay with her parents. They were going to stay at the same motel as Bella. I told them to pick me up on the way through as I left my car at home.

I went back inside and told everyone that I will be staying with Bella and that I was going to pack my things. I also told them that Jasper and Edward are coming into town for moral support for Bella. Billy took me home and went back to the hospital. While I was packing all my stuff again, I rang Bella to let her know that I will stay with her and that the guys would be arriving tonight. We decided that we would take the guys out to dinner and show them a bit of Port Angeles. Bella was making an effort to be upbeat as to hide her misery.

The guys arrived to pick me up and on the way to Port Angeles I told them everything that I knew and also that she wanted to get some legal advice. I filled them in of our plans for this evening, in which they were happy to oblige us. Although, Edward had made reference to knowing Port Angeles and Forks well as his family still own a place just outside of Forks. At least Jasper will get a kick out of seeing the sights at night. I wanted to show him that I was interested in him in a roundabout way. It's not like I was going to come right out and tell him now, is it?

We got to PA in record time as Edward was driving and apparently he likes to drive fast and have soiled seats as his passengers would most likely not now this about him and shit themselves. Literally! I left them to check in while I went to Bella's room. She was happy to see me but the smile still didn't reach her eyes. The guys came past and told us that they managed to get the room a couple of doors down. Bella seemed relieved that they were only a few doors away.

So what do you think has happened between Bella and Sam? Eddzie wants answers as well!

Leave a review and get a teaser! Please let me know what you think. Tell me you hate it or tell me what i can do better. This is my forst attempt and it would be nice to know where i can improve.

Until next chapter. xxxx


	5. Confidante

_**A/N: Firstly I would like to thankyou for being paitent. I am sorry that it took so long to write this chapter. It took me to a dark place and I would like to warn you that tissues may be needed when reading. Also, I don't wish to offend anyone if some of the content or situations relate to your personal experiences. Please remember that this is fiction and I had this situation in mind when i first started writing. I didn't think that all will be revealed by now but it is the way that the story took me. **_

**_This has taken a while to write because apart from looking after 3 kids under 5, I have had to plan birthday parties. I have been exremely busy these last few weeks and haven't had a lot of spare time for me. Also a lot of time has been researching prospective outcomes for future chapters so that this one can be completed._**

**_Thank you to everyone that has added me to their favouties list. It is good to know that you are interested in reading this story._**

**_Thank you to Eddzie for being my support and beta on this chapter. You are cherished and loved by me and all those around you that actually take the time to know you._**

**_Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns all that is Twilight... no copyright intended._**

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**__**BPOV**_

I was sitting on my bed when Alice bounded through the door with as much exuberance that would normally make me laugh uncontrollably but I was definitely not in the right frame of mind to even form a smile let alone laugh. I know what she wanted to accomplish but in my melancholy state, there was no breaking through.

"Hey Bella, I have decided to stay with you here. Jasper and Edward are checking In. So are you going to tell me what's going on?" Her smile faded and her face was now full of concern and her voice laced with worry.

"The letter Maddy gave me was from Sam. He wants to meet me so that we can talk. I don't know if I can do that." I looked down at my hands trying at all costs not to look Alice in the eyes.

"Bella, come off it... let it go and just talk to Sam. Talk to me... talk to someone but you can't keep doing this to yourself. You are going to send yourself to an early grave or a mental Institution. I for one won't visit you there. So start thinking about yourself and start to move on." I was stunned with the irritated tone Alice used and within the next breath her tone was more subdued and upbeat. "I don't know what happened and I know in your time you will tell me but just for tonight... we are going to go out and for dinner with Jasper and Edward. So get showered and changed and turn your frown upside down. It will be fun. You need this."

I relented and sauntered off to the bathroom to grab a shower. I had let the hot water cascade over my body releasing the tension I had within my muscles. I guess I was in there longer than necessary because Alice was banging on the door threatening to come in. I quickly turned off the shower and dried myself. I opened the door to the bedroom with the towel wrapped around myself to see three sets of eyes on me. I yelped in fright and scrambled back into the bathroom. I think somewhere in my scramble to get back into the bathroom, I slipped and the towel started coming down.

"ALICE! Can you get me some clothes please?" I yelled really embarrassed about what just happened. She knocked on the bathroom door quietly and I opened it just enough for Alice to enter the bathroom with my clothes.

"Why didn't you warn me that the guys were here? A little heads up would have been great. I can't bear to look at them from sheer embarrassment. How much could you see? When the towel fell, I mean!" My face was flushed a dark shade of red. I was trying to get as many clothes on as I could in a hurry.

"You should learn to take your clothes In with you." Alice grinned trying to stifle her laugh. "Don't worry, you were very modest and they didn't see anything... I'm sure they have seen girls naked before though Bella!"

"Thanks Alice. They haven't seen me naked and I would like to keep it that way." I started to give in to the situation and laughed. And the more I laughed the harder the laugh came, before I knew it I was on the floor laughing and holding my stomach. It felt strange to laugh, almost like a weight has lifted off my shoulders. Alice was right I need to let go and move on.

I composed myself and held my head up high as I walked out of the bathroom with Alice. "Sorry don't think you were meant to see that." They both laughed In agreement.

"Shall we go? I'm in desperate need of a drink." I tried not to show them that I was a little unstable at the moment. The letter I got from Sam was playing on my mind. There was more to it that I didn't want Alice to know.

We went to town to a restaurant on the pier. Once we were seated I ordered a shot of Chartreuse and a glass of vodka lemon lime. They were stunned that I went straight for the hard stuff. A refined drinker would know that two or three shots of chartreuse and you were hammered. But I only went for the one... for now!

I was sitting between Alice and Edward with Jasper opposite me. We had our dinner and chatted away about Jacob and how he is. I told Alice I had spoken to Carlisle and that he suggested that we transport Jacob to Seattle hospital where he could get the best treatment. Forks hospital was only small and I wanted to make sure that Jake was ok for everyone's sake. Alice said she would talk to Billy and Sue and let me know.

After dinner we decided to go for a walk. Once the cold air had hit me I Instantly felt unsteady on my feet. I felt like I was about to fall when I felt arms around me keeping me upright. For the life of me I can't remember how many drinks I had. I know I had more shots but my mind was fuzzy.

"You two go ahead and take a walk... I'll take Bella back to her room. I think she needs to sleep it off." Alice gave me a hug and told me that she wouldn't be out too long.

Edward drove us to the motel and carried me into my room. I took in his smell and he smelt of a rainforest after it has rained. The warming feeling you get from smelling the trees and flowers and undergrowth. It was strangely familiar and I wanted to bask in the scent forever.

Once he placed me ever so gently on the bed I found I was reluctant to let him go. I felt a connection between us and before I knew what happened I broke down. Sobbing Into his chest. Repeating the words _I can't do this... I can't do this..._

Taken aback by my reaction, Edward looked down at me with concerned eyes, "What can't you do Bella?" He still had his arms wrapped around me and moved me to his lap.

I lifted my head to look into his gorgeous green eyes and I found myself wanting to confide in him. I pulled out the letter from my bra... I didn't want it left anywhere where it can be found. I gave it to Edward "once you read this please don't tell anyone about it."

Edward read the letter and as he slowly looked up to me I could see that he was shocked. "Have you told anyone else? Alice maybe?"

I shook my head as I ran my hand through my hair and begged "you can't tell anyone. I have been fighting with my parents about this and when I came back, I went home and got into another fight with them. That's why I'm staying here. Now Sam wants to meet with me and I just don't know if I can do that. You are the only one that knows some of what's going on."

"Can you tell me the rest? I understand if you can't but it may help to get it all out in the open... well more off your chest." He genuinely looked concerned about the little he knew about my problems. He smelt so good and looking in his eyes, I was mesmerised. I was completely drawn to him. But I had to push these feelings out of my head because he was engaged.

Reluctantly, I started telling him my story... "Sam and I have known each other for a long time. He lives on the reservation not far from Alice and Jacob's house. I was always at Alice's because we were and still are inseparable. I got to know Sam very well and liked the man he was turning into. I was sixteen when we finally got together even though I knew Alice liked him. I thought I was in love with him Edward, but what happened next showed me just how much I was wrong."

I was about to continue when Alice and Jasper bounded through the door. I quickly put the letter back into my bra and wiped my tears hoping they didn't see. Alice caught me wiping my eyes. "What's going on Bella?"

"Nothing, just drunk. Give me a break will you" fuck that sounded a bit defensive. "Sorry Alice, not in control of my mouth either I see." I smiled at her and went to hug her. She seemed to appreciate the gesture. I went to lie down on my bed and Edward went to get up to leave.

"Don't go because of me... I am just lying down. If my drunkenness puts me into a slumber then so be it." I rolled over not realising how close I was to the edge and felt myself starting to fall. "FUCK, SHIT... Oowwow!" I looked up over the bed to everyone else, noticing that they were trying to stifle their laughs, and I couldn't contain my laughter anymore and started laughing and holding onto my stomach. I was literally rolling on the floor and I had tears streaming down my face, my cheeks and tummy were starting to hurt.

As quickly s the laughing started, it turned into crying. It was uncontrollable. I was crying for me, I was crying for Jacob, I was crying for my parents, I was crying for Sam and I was crying for Maddy. I needed to tell Alice and finish telling my story to Edward.

I felt myself get carried and placed onto the bed. And from the smell that I inhaled, it was Edward. I wrapped my arms around his neck and couldn't force myself to let go. This felt so right yet was wrong on so many levels. He was engaged. I heard hushed voices. I could hear Alice talked animatedly to Jasper about needing to comfort me, but then I heard Jasper telling Edward that he was taking Alice to their room. _No, no, no... Alice can't leave me... why can't I let go of Edward? God he smells so good... I can't have him though. _

_I need to tell him everything so I can't get hurt again. I don't know him to well so it won't hurt as much when he doesn't want to talk to me again. He will leave like everyone else in my life that knows. My parents were the first to leave._

I tried to open my eyes so that I could look into Edward's crystal green eyes and bask in their beauty before I have to see the look of disdain in them and say goodbye forever.

"Edward? I'm sorry for that. I don't know what came over me." I kept my arms wrapped around his neck and looked down at my lap.

He lifted my chin up with his finger so that I could look him in the eyes. "Bella, are you ok? Has this got something to do with what you started to tell me earlier?" His lips lifted to give me a sad smile while he ran one of his hands through my hair. Caressing me like you would a child that's hurt themselves or had a bad dream.

"I'm fine now. I felt so stupid falling off the bed and laughed at my constant mishaps. And yes then it turned out to be me crying over my fucked up life and how I got here." I could feel a new wave of tears spring to my eyes. I tried to hold them back but some spilled over my eye lids.

"Do you want to continue telling me... maybe I can help!" there was hope in his voice. I wanted so much to hold onto that hope and not crush the impression he has of me already.

**EPOV**

I can't believe what I just read. Bella is such a mess and has been living with this for so long without telling anyone.

Bella nodded and tried to compose herself before continuing her story.

"I thought that Sam loved me the way I loved him. I would have given my right foot to him if he needed it. And I basically did just that only it was much different." Bella looked down and I could see tears well up in her eyes.

"I know that at one stage in our relationship that he met Emily and he couldn't stop talking about her. I started to get worried but Jake assured me that there was nothing going on between them. Sam asked me to go away with him after about six months into our relationship and I agreed. Charlie and Renee, for all intents and purposes are, or were, my parents, agreed to let me go with him. Charlie knew Sam's father and trusted Sam with his only daughter, as he put it. We went to a small cottage not far from here in Port Angeles. He treated me like a princess and I believed in his lies and stories about how beautiful and how special I was. But it was all lies. All he wanted was to get me into bed and at first I agreed thinking that I was ready but when we started I asked him to stop." Bella started crying again as she relived these painful memories. She was playing with her hands. I was speechless for the first time in my life. I didn't know what to say that would console her and all I could do was rub small circles on her back.

"He...wouldn't...stop! He didn't listen to me and he kept going." She was crying hysterically now and I embraced her. I felt that even though I didn't have any words that would help, my actions would say a lot, and I held her in the tightest embrace that I could. There was something about Bella that I felt I needed to be protective of her. It was like I was an addict and she was my own personal brand of heroin. This was so much more intense. It was never like this with Tanya. I reached over to the bedside table to get the box of tissues for Bella.

"Shhh, Bella. It's ok. I am sorry for what you have been through. You don't have to continue if you don't want to." I wanted her to know that there is no pressure to talk about it all now. She didn't have to continue at all if she didn't want to but I was interested in hearing the rest. I know from what I read in the letter and from what she has said that I really wanted to hurt this guy Sam more than anything. But why is she fighting with her parents. Time will tell I guess.

Bella shook her head 'no' saying "you need to hear it all. It will help explain the letter." I nodded secretly happy that I get to hear the rest and privileged that she would confide in me when she hasn't even told her best friend Alice yet.

"After we got back from Port Angeles I was a changed person. I rarely went out to see Alice and kind of went into a shell. I was in my own little world which no one could invade. I built walls up so high that no one could break through. I started seeing Sam less and less and Charlie wanted to know why and what happened for me to have changed my mind. It wasn't until I realised that I hadn't had my period in over a month that I started to get worried. After school one day I bought a pregnancy kit and found out that I was pregnant.

I shit myself when I realised that I had to tell Charlie and Renee. When I got the courage to tell them, they called me a slut and a whore for sleeping around. They basically said that I was damaged goods and no wonder why Sam doesn't want to see me anymore. I told them what happened that night in Port Angeles and my own father didn't believe me. He is the god damn chief of police and he did nothing because he didn't believe his own daughter." What kind of parent does that to a child? Fuck this is getting worse as it goes along. I'm not sure if I want to know anymore now. My god! My poor Bella.

"Renee packed a bag for me and a bag for her and she moved us to Phoenix until I had the baby. Charlie contacted Sam to tell him about the baby. Charlie questioned him about me telling him to stop but Sam denied it and said that it was consensual. Fucking liar that he is. Sam said that he will take the baby because he has met someone that he felt was the one for him. They were going to be married soon after and because she is unable to have children they will raise the baby.

I cried night after night for nine months because I had lost everything. I had lost Sam, who I thought I loved my family and now the baby that I had grown to love. I wasn't given a choice by my parents whether I wanted to keep it or not. Every decision was made for me. After the baby was born, I wanted so much to hold her and take her home with me but my mom wouldn't let me. I named her Madison and told Renee that that was her name and to make sure that I at least was able to name her. She passed on the message when she was delivered to Sam. My baby was delivered like a fucking parcel. Charlie came to Phoenix to get her and take her back to him.

What Charlie didn't know was that while I was having Maddy, I had lost a lot of blood and there were some complications. The doctors don't think I am ever able to have any more children. So, I poured my heart and soul into my studies. If I couldn't have kids then I want to work with them. Be there when they first enter the world. That's why I want to spend time and like talking to Rose about her life. She is a beautiful person and she has the life I wanted for myself.

Now Sam wants to meet with me and talk. He gave the fucking letter to Maddy to give to me and when I saw her, Edward it was like looking in a mirror. She has gorgeous brown eyes and long brown wavy hair, just like me. I am really surprised that Jacob and Alice haven't noticed the similarities. What do I do? I know I need to meet with him at some point. But I was quite surprised that they allowed me to see Maddy. Part of the verbal agreement was that I don't try to contact them and go anywhere near her. I want to get to know my daughter. I have missed out on so much and she is probably the only chance I have of having one of my own." Bella took me by surprise. I was expecting a new round of tears but instead her silent tears were soaking up my shirt.

"Bella, do you think I could look at the letter again? I just need to understand everything." She nodded and gave me the letter. "Let's lay down so you can get some rest. I'll be right here if you need anything ok?" She allowed me to lay her down under the covers. "I'm just going to my room to get a change of clothes to sleep in. I will be right back. Maybe you should change into something more comfortable to while I'm gone.

I quickly went to get changed so that I could lie next to Bella and comfort her. I had a secret agenda attached to that. I couldn't help but feel a special closeness to Bella and there definitely was something there. As I opened the door to my room, I was shocked to see Alice and jasper going for it. I tried not to look and find my bag and leave. Alice noticed me and screamed.

"Hey don't mind me just getting my bag and I will be out of here in no time. Could have fuckin' given me the heads up that this is what you guys wanted to do and I would have gotten my stuff without having to scar my brain with images of you two having sex. How can I sterilize my brain?" I grabbed my bag and left. I went back to Bella's room and saw her asleep in the bed in the foetal position. She was clutching onto her pillow as if her life depended on her holding onto it.

I went into the bathroom and changed into a pair of sweatpants and a wife beater. Before I went to Bella I needed to get some air. I couldn't help but think about all the information that I had just received from her and I had to get my anger under control. How could her parent act the way they did? If she were my daughter I would have had Sam's ass in jail for rape. I sat outside the door and left the door ajar. I opened the letter to re-read the letter.

_Dear Bella,_

_First I would like to apologise for the way things went down five years ago.  
I would really like a chance to talk about everything and see if we can reach  
some sort of agreement or arrangement between us. _

_Charlie and Renee have been visiting regularly and they are a constant reminder  
of us and what we were for a short time. Something I am not proud of at all._

_Please let me know of your decision. I hope you will meet me as there is a lot to  
discuss. _

_Sam_

There definitely is a lot to discuss. If Bella needs any legal advice for when she meets Sam, I will need to get my head in check. I can't give advice based on my feelings towards him.

Fuck this is so hard. I didn't go through any of this and I want to rip his dick off.

I got myself together and went back into the room. I laid down next to Bella and wrapped her in my arms. She is so fragile at the moment that I wanted to give her some comfort while she slept. I kissed the back of her head and tried to sleep. It became difficult to fall asleep because being in such close proximity to Bella I could feel my dick getting hard. _Think of old ladies... better yet think of Jasper and Alice._ Yep that did the trick.

Sometime during the night she screamed and started hitting me and telling me to stop. I bolted out of bed while she clutched at the covers.

"Bella, it was just a dream... it's me Edward. I'm not Sam..." I exclaimed with my hands out in front of me urging her to stop yelling and listen to me.

"But...but... you were in my bed... what did we do? Be honest with me Edward. I don't want to make the same mistake again. I won't! I didn't agree to this." Bella was frantically trying to get everything out. She looked petrified.

"We didn't do anything. Look... we are fully clothed. I laid down next to you to comfort you. You weren't in a good place last night. You have to believe that I wouldn't do that to you. I like you too much to jeopardise our friendship. But Bella, I'm not Sam. I wouldn't take advantage of you like that." I slowly walked to the bed and sat on the edge. She didn't yell at me which was a good sign and she didn't push me away. "can I give you a hug at least... you are shaking." She nodded in response as tears started spilling over her eye lids. I leaned in to hug her and started rubbing small circles on her back. God she smelt so good and little Edward just woke up... great.

I pulled back to look at Bella so that I could reassure her that I am not at all like Sam. Fuck, I would love for her to have my children... What the fuck am I thinking? I'm engaged to Tanya and this is what I think about with someone else. Well doesn't this make me more confused about my feelings than ever before? Fuck me!

**BPOV**

I seemed to calm down some what after Edward gave me a comforting embrace. He smelled so good. As he looked into my eyes I had the sudden urge to lean in and kiss him. Before I could stop myself I placed my lips upon his gently taking in his bottom lip. As quickly as my kiss started, it ended. Edward pulled away looking at me in shock. I felt my cheeks blush and quickly turned around. I was just about to get out of the bed when I felt Edward's hands on either side of my cheeks, guiding my face to look at him. I may have been mistaken but I thought I saw something in his eyes.

"I...I'm so so..." I was cut off before I could complete my apology. He crashed his mouth to mine and probed my mouth with his tongue seeking entrance into my mouth.

I opened my mouth suddenly feeling intense passion and wanting more of him. I frantically grabbed his hair and pushed his head towards mine. I felt the need to be closer to Edward. His tongue mingling with my own in desperation, there was an urgency to our kissing. It was like we were meant to be together, that this felt right and we were the missing pieces of the puzzle. Well that's how it felt for me. I pulled away realising that Edward was still engaged and nothing could come of this. Gasping for air that I urgently needed. I scrambled out of his embrace.

"You... you... you're engaged. We shouldn't be doing this. This can't happen. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have let it happen." I was shocked that I allowed this to happen. I all but yelled at Edward and he looked just as shocked at my outburst as I did.

Edward stood up and slowly walked towards me. "It's ok Bella. You didn't make me do anything I didn't want to do. Granted I am engaged but I haven't felt like this in a long time. I don't even know how I feel about my fiancé and that's why I am here. I needed space and had to get away. I want to be here. I want to be near you and help you through your crisis. Can you let me be here for you?" He pulled me into a hug and I nodded.

I want him here, I want him with me. I have this enormous pull towards him. I can't shake this feeling. But it still doesn't alleviate the fact that he is still engaged. Regardless of whether he is unsure of his feelings towards her, I can't forget that and I can't allow this to get out of hand again.

"Can we just go to sleep now? I don't think I can handle more drama right now."

"No worries, love. You sleep it has been a big emotional day!" OH...MY...GOD! he just called me love. My heart just did little flips and is pounding in my chest.

"Edward, before you sleep, can I ask one thing?"

"Sure thing, what is it?"

"Can you help me get some sort of custody of Maddy? I don't know if I have any rights and what I can ask for. I don't know what my parents agreed to."

"We can talk about it in the morning. Just rest and think about whether you want to talk to Sam. It may be a good idea seeing as though he holds the cards in seeing Maddy at the moment. And we may need to talk to your parents as well. But we will go through everything in the morning. Sleep now!"

And with that we slept. Edward was holding onto me... you could say we were spooning. But it felt nice. It was comforting and he made me feel safe. I felt that I could trust him and I know he will help me with my endeavour to see Maddy on a regular basis.

* * *

_**I know that some of may have been through something similar. I would love to hear your thoughts on the subject. Even if i didn't capture the true emotions involved as I have never been in this situation, please let me know what you think. **_

**_If you have any experience about family law, i would love to hear ways that Bella can get some sort of custody or visitation rights._**

**__****I am starting back at work soon and my aim is to still write my story when i get some free time, not that I get much. School holidays have started! I have a week to spend some time with my baby. She is 5 and this is her first year at school, I have a boy who just turned 3 and another baby girl who is 9 months. Feel my pain!**

**__****_Before i sign off for another chapter you have to read Picture Windows by nerac... it is complete and a beautiful story. _**

**_Thank you for reading my story and please review and let me know what you think and how you feel!_**

_**mwah **_

_**Grace xxxx**_


	6. Revelations

**A/N: **Firstly, i would like to thank you all for your patience for the next chapter to be published. I must say that real life has a way of delaying things. i had hoped that it would have been ready within a few weeks of the last chapter but my 10 month old baby got sick and had to go to hospital for a few days. She is still not well and my other 2 children got sick and so did I.

I have started back at work and am working on a new story with my beta Eddzie who I love to bits. Hopefully it won't take too long for the next chapter to be written an pblished.

I hope you enjoy this story and leave some lovin at the end. Let me know what you think.

_Disclaimer: I don't own anything Twilight that is SM's baby. But i do own this story._

* * *

BPOV

I woke up to find Edward's arms wrapped around me and the feeling of warmth and safety that I have wanted for so long. It felt so nice to be in the arms of a man. I have longed for this feeling but I haven't allowed myself to feel like this in what feels like forever. Every time I went out for dinner with a man I would abruptly end the evening and not allow them inside my apartment. When I had Madison and was told of the complications and the fact that I will never have children, I haven't wanted to let men attach themselves to me or I to let myself because of what I can't give them.

I ever so gently slipped out of bed and grabbed a few clothes and went for a shower. I wasn't going to risk having a repeat of the night before. Once the hot spray hit me, it sent tingles down my body. I couldn't get the image of Edward in my bed out of my head. I had to refrain from giving myself some release because I didn't want him to hear me.

I wanted to sneak out and get breakfast for everyone, especially Edward, who stayed with me even though he heard my story he still stayed. He didn't leave me like Sam or my parents did all those years ago.

I was hoping that I would see Alice soon so that I could arrange to meet up with Sam. I needed to talk to him and I wanted some kind of relationship with my child. She would be my only child and I wanted to know all about her. This reminds me, I have to speak to Charlie and Renee. I need to know what they agreed to. I need to know what was said to Sam in exchange for my daughter.

I was lost in my thoughts and I didn't realise that Edward was awake and watching me until I heard his voice. "Good morning beautiful. How did you sleep?"

I felt the heat rise to my face remembering that I was asleep with him last night. "Morning, I slept fine and you?"

"Couldn't have slept better. Bella, don't take this the wrong way but I think you should tell Alice everything." I nodded in acknowledgment because I knew that I had to tell her. I couldn't keep my best friend in the dark any more. "I appreciate that you have let me in and confided in me. I know that must have been difficult. I can talk to you about your rights with regards to visitation and custody, but... I need to know what has been said between all parties. What did your parents agree to with Sam in regards to your child? I also need to know if there is any legal document that signs your baby over to Sam relinquishing your parenting rights."

"Edward, I was out of it when Madison was born because I haemorrhaged and was rushed into surgery. I honestly don't remember signing anything. I didn't want to give her up. I wanted to keep her. I was willing to let a couple of years of schooling slide by so that I could raise my daughter. My parents knew my wishes but because I was a minor they wouldn't allow the Swan name to be tarnished. Sam didn't want me after he found out I was pregnant. He told me that he was in love with Emily and she couldn't have kids. He said that he just wanted me to have the baby for him so that he and Emily can look after it. I looked so much like Emily that no one would know that it wasn't hers. She faked her pregnancy. I felt so used and I still do." A wave of tears fell over my lids, "Am I that ugly that all I'm good for is to fuck and then dump? I can't believe that after all these years that I still feel the same about Sam. I don't know if I could ever forgive him or my parents for the hell they put me through.

"I haven't let anyone in until yesterday. You are the only person I have felt comfortable to talk to. And it was a huge step for me to let you sleep in the same bed as me, let alone touch me. I have guarded myself for so long Edward that I don't know if I can let the walls I put up crumble fully. It has been over five years since I put up these walls and it is going to take a lot for the walls to come down. What I have given you is a glimpse into my world. It doesn't mean that I am totally unguarded when it comes to men and my personal life. I hope you can appreciate that!

"I was going to ask Alice to tell Sam that I would meet him. And I was going to try to talk to Charlie and Renee. I need to have answers now. Can I ask one thing Edward?" I looked up into Edward's eyes because I wanted him to see that I have truly let him in.

"Firstly Bella, you are not ugly at all. You are a beautiful woman that has been through the wringer and then some in the short time you have lived. I can't imagine what you are feeling but I can at least sympathise with you. Love, as long as you would like me to be here for you I will even if you just want me to listen or just for company and not talk.

"Secondly, I am honoured that you allowed me to lay with you just to comfort you. I know that must have been hard and I appreciate you telling me your story. I will keep it but I still think that you should tell Alice.

"Bella, I have this strong feeling that I need to protect you, if you would let me. What did you want to ask me?" Edward looked me straight in the eyes when he told me all this. I felt the need to crawl in his lap and just hold him and have him hold me.

"Edward, will you be with me when I speak to everyone. I would also like to know if you will be my lawyer and find out what we can do for me to get some sort of visitation rights. I feel as though I have known you for so long. It's like you are an old soul and we can connect on that level. I feel as though you ground me. " I couldn't believe how at ease I felt around him. I wanted him with me at all costs. Even if it was just to hold my hands while I went through everything again. "I'm just going to get breakfast for everyone so that I can tell them here instead of at a cafe. Can you get Alice and Jasper here for when I get back please? Be back soon." With that I got up and went out.

When I came back I noticed that Edward had everyone in my room. There seemed to be a satisfied look on Alice's and Jasper's face. OMG they totally had sex last night. "What's with the goofy grin Alice?" I teased.

It was good to know that I could still get a blush out of her. "Breakfasts ready, come and get it!" I exclaimed and before I could look at anyone they were all sitting around the little table eating like they hadn't eaten in a long time. While they were all stuffing their faces with food and coffee, I figured that now was just a good as any time to tell my story.

"So I figured while you are all quiet, that you should know what's been up the last few days." I looked at everyone's faces and saw different emotions on each of them. Shock on Alice's, worry on Jasper's and compassion and understanding on Edward's. I found that just by being near him, I could feel his reassurance that he wouldn't leave me. That he would do as he promised and support me through it all.

As I retold my story for Alice and Jasper, I could feel the rage Edward was emitting. Even though he had heard it all before he was seething at what I had endured. Alice was crying and Jasper's jaw had dropped and it took some time before he closed it.

Once I had finished, Alice threw her arms around me and kept repeating that she was sorry. "I so want to kick Sam's ass for you. Can I please? It would give me so much pleasure."

"Wait in line..." was Jasper and Edward's simultaneous response.

Wiping away my own tears I couldn't help but laugh at everyone's response. "I was so scared that you would leave me if you knew Alice. I know how great your friendship is with Sam. I didn't want anyone to think that I was a slut or a whore like my parents thought of me."

"There is no way I could think that of you B, you are my girl and I will always be there for you. I'm sorry that you couldn't tell anyone and had to live with it for five years. Now thinking about it, it is uncanny at how much Madison looks like you. I noticed it but I just dismissed it and thought that you looked like Emily a bit anyway. That's probably why he chose you over me. I honestly didn't know that he was seeing Emily while he was with you." She came and gave me another hug and we all sat down and discussed the next step.

I know I wanted to see Sam but I also wanted to talk to Charlie and Renee. Edward and Jasper immediately told me that it would be better to see my parents first.

~X~X~X~X~

"Why did you come back?"

That was the last thing I needed to hear from Charlie. "We need to talk and I need answers." I was surprised with the amount of determination and authority that I held in my voice.

"You can't come here and demand things. This isn't your house anymore. I have helped you enough to get settled in Seattle but that's it." Charlie looked like he was going to have an aneurism.

"Just let us in Charlie. You both owe me answers. Oh, by the way this is Edward and he is _**my**_ lawyer. He is here to assess where we all stand in this huge mess you and Renee created for us all." He humphed and moved out of the doorway and let us in.

We took seats on the couch and Charlie called Renee in to talk to us as well. It did involve her too and she was a big part of this whole scenario.

After a staring match that seemed like 10 minutes, which was probably about a minute, I decided to ask the hard questions...

"After I had Madison, what did you tell Sam or agree to with Sam about custody?" I looked into Charlie's eyes to show him that I wasn't messing around. I was almost willing him to lie to me, to tell me nothing. But it didn't come.

"Isabella, what do you want me to say? You got yourself into a mess and we got you out. End of story. Why are you bringing this up anyway?" The bastard avoided my question.

"I want the truth Charlie. Yes, I got myself into a mess and I was willing to take care of my own mess. I wanted to keep the baby which you knew and completely ignored. I was able to see her for a minute before you ripped her out of my arms and gave her away. Which I recently found out was Sam. You both totally disregarded my wishes. Sam gave Madison to give me a letter informing me that she is my daughter and a constant reminder of me. He also tells me that he wants to meet me to talk about all this and that you have been visiting them. Tell me the truth!" I was practically screaming at them. I felt my face heat up in anger and I could feel five years of rage that I had bottled up come to a head.

"I told Sam that he now has custody of the baby and that you named her Madison. I at least told him what you named her." Charlie somewhat looked shocked at my outburst. He obviously thought that by telling Sam what I named my baby was supposed to give him some sort of reprieve about what he has done. I actually think that he thinks that I will forgive him now. Like Hell.

Edward spoke up before I could get another word in... "When you say that Sam now has custody what did you mean? Did you get Bella to sign a legal document relinquishing her parental rights? If so, we need a copy of these documents."

Renee got up and walked out of the room without saying a word. Charlie just stood staring at Edward like he has two heads or something. There was something amiss with Charlie and Renee's reactions.

Before he could answer Renee walked back in the room with a document in her hand. She handed it to Edward mumbling a quiet I'm so sorry which was barely audible.

I looked at the document as Edward opened it and he saw a legal disclaimer that relinquished any and all parental rights over the baby. I didn't remember signing this... I wouldn't have. I all but snatched the papers out of Edward's hands and searched for my signature. I just stood there gaping at the paper then at my parents then at Edward. He noticed the look on my face and quickly got up to wrap his arms around me. He held me for the longest time whispering soothing words in my ears... shh its ok we'll get through this... things along that nature.

I pulled away and looked at him directly in his emerald green eyes. "Edward that is not my signature. They fucking forged my signature. Is there any way I can get Madison back?" I turned to look at my so called parents seething so much that I swear you could see steam coming out of my ears... I could feel tears forming behind my eye lids and start to spill down my cheeks.

"You both fucking ruined my life. Not only did you give my child away against my will... you took my only chance at a family as well. She is the only family I have left. Did the doctors tell you that there were complications and that I can't have any more children? Did you know this and still willingly give up my only child? You are both dead to me. Be prepared to go to court because I am going to sue you both for all you have. I don't fucking care if you both have well respected names in this god forsaken town but when I'm through with you, you will want to relocate. I fucking hate both of you for destroying my life. I hope you are satisfied." With that I dropped to the floor crying to the point of hyperventilating.

Edward sat down beside me and just held me in his arms. I have never cried so much in the past few days surely I didn't have any more tears to shed. But the tears kept flowing.

I don't know how long we sat there for but it seemed like hours. Soon there was a knock on the door and I heard the familiar sound of a voice I dreaded to hear.

Sam was welcomed into the house by my mother. It sounded like she gave him a hug and this infuriated me. I am supposed to be her daughter, why is she hugging him.

I stiffened and grabbed Edward's hand tight when I heard footsteps come into the room.

"YOU! This is YOUR entire fault. Why did you have to pretend to love me and trick me into sleeping with you so that you can have a baby? You have ruined my life and the relationship I had with my parents. Did you know that they love you more than me? That they have always backed you and not me? They have basically disowned me and are visiting my daughter and yet they want nothing to do with me. What you don't know Sam is that they forged my signature on the legal documents. I didn't want to give her up... she was mine." It surprised me that I was able to say my piece to Sam in an eerily calm manner.

"Bella, I wanted to meet you to tell you that I am so sorry about not telling you that I have our baby. I did love you actually but I loved Emily more. She is my life and I did what I had to do to give her what she wanted..."

"Even if it destroyed me in the process... Am I that indispensable to you? Why did you keep this from me for so long? She is my only child and will ever be my only child and I have every intention of fighting you for her. She was taken from me without my consent. No one told me whom Madison was given to but once I saw her in Jakes room, I knew she was mine. They took her away while I was in emergency surgery. I can't have any more kids and now I want my only child back. I didn't want you to know about Madison because you basically raped me and then dumped me."

"Bella, I didn't rape you... you wanted to and..."

"And I said no and told you to stop. You kept going and..."

"But it was too late to stop. You can't be a cock tease Bella." .God. Did he just say that to me...

I was infuriated with the last comment and clenched my hands into fists by my side willing myself to breathe. All of a sudden I lost control of my body and flew towards him and started hitting him in the chest. "How dare you say that to me? How dare you treat me like shit even now? Fuck you Sam and Fuck all of you." I felt Edward pull me backwards and hold me in a tight embrace. Just willing me to calm down enough to leave.

"I think enough has been said today. I am taking these documents as they will be evidence presented in court. I suggest you get attorneys as Bella will be filing for custody of Madison. Make sure that Madison is available for Bella to see on a regular basis at the moment. You don't have legal custody of her as Bella still has parental her rights intact. Forgery is never a good thing, especially for the chief of police. See you in court." And with that Edward guided me out of the house with his arm around my waist.

"I'm sorry Edward, did I hurt our chances in court by letting my emotions get the better of me?" I was worried that I had ruined any chance I had to be with my daughter.

~X~X~X~X~

We found a park outside the hospital. No matter what I was going through I still wanted to see Jacob. I was hoping that Alice told Jacob everything so that I didn't have to.

Turning to Edward I hold onto his arm to stop him from walking through the hospital doors. I needed to talk to him.

"Edward, thank you for back there. I needed your support and I felt safe in your arms. It's not a feeling that I can fully describe but you grounded me. My body was out of control but your touch settled my mind and calmed my frustrations and nerves. I hope that makes sense. I don't want you to think that I am disregarding your relationship or your engagement. I'm not but I just wanted you to know how I felt with you around me today. I'm glad you will be my lawyer. Also, I think I should let Carlisle know about everything because I want to go back soon. I am hoping Billy and Sue agree to let me transport Jake to Seattle. Can we fight for custody of Madison from there?" I exhaled the breath I didn't know I was holding. I chanced a look into Edward's piercing green eyes to gauge his reaction.

"Bella, I find that there is chemistry between us that is unexplainable. But yes, I am still engaged so it would be wrong for me to act upon it. But I understand how you are feeling. I am happy to represent you until this is settled. Shall we go in?" I could see that there was more that he wanted to say but refrained from saying it. I have overstepped the line already so I left it alone.

Walking into Jake's room, Alice, Jasper, Billy, Sue, Emily and Madison were there. I said hello to everyone and introduced Edward to them all. I gave Jake a huge hug and asked him, Billy and Sue if we could transport him to Seattle so that I can make sure he is getting the best care to help him recuperate better.

Emily started to object but I jumped in... "You don't get to speak, you don't get to put in your opinion... you have done enough actually." I didn't know where that came from. I was just feeling so exhilarated from my outburst towards Sam and now Emily.

"Are you ok B? You seem a bit off. How did your meeting go?" Alice came up to me pushing me back out the door. Obviously she didn't want me go vent my anger towards the only mother Madison has ever known. Just as I was about to answer Alice, Emily walked out of the room.

"What is your problem Bella? I didn't deserve any of that and everyone is asking questions."

"Hate to tell you this Emily but you did deserve that. If it wasn't for you, I probably would still be able to have children because I wouldn't have gotten pregnant to Sam. You have taken my life away from me and I want it back. You have until tomorrow morning to tell Madison who I am. She deserves to know that I am her real mother and I intend on seeing her often. She was stolen from me and I want her back. You don't have her legally no matter what documents you may have signed. So I would call Sam at my parent's house and I would tell her as soon as possible because there is going to be a fight for her. The guy I walked in with is my lawyer. His name is Edward Cullen, so I would get used to that name because you will be dealing with him most of the time." With that I walked back into Jake's room, leaving Emily behind with her mouth gaping open.

I heard her talking to Alice... "Alice, I swear I didn't know..."

"Bullshit Emily. You knew and you kept it a secret from all of us. Now I know why you wouldn't look us in the face when we commented on Maddy's gorgeous looks and big brown eyes. And you let Charlie and Renee visit her. You let her call them Grandma and Granddad. You didn't say a word. I can't look at you at the moment Emily. I back Bella all the way. She has been like my sister since we were young and I believe everything she told me. Now I suggest that you call Sam like she asked and you tell Maddy before the morning and try to work something out with Bella. You have no idea what yours and Sam's scheme has done to her emotionally. You have ruined her life and I had to pick up the pieces. She thought that I wouldn't want to be her friend anymore if she told me what happened five years ago. But what you don't realise was that when she did finally tell me... which was this morning by the way... I wanted nothing more than to support her through this. If she wants to take you guys to court then I will be by her side. I will be with her every step of the way in getting what she really deserves. And she deserves Maddy! As much as you don't want to believe it, Maddy deserves to be with the most honest person I know. She needs to know her real mom and she needs to know that she was always wanted by her. I know what it's like being adopted. I need to know the same things. So I will be advocating for Madison. I will apply to the courts to advocate on her behalf. She knows me well and she will talk to me. Speak to Sam and tell her now." Alice was quite discrete in telling Emily how she felt in the hallways of the hospital. She has a lot more decorum than me I guess.

"Billy, Sue will you let me know soon what you decide about Jacob. I have to go, sorry I couldn't stay longer, but I will visit soon. I promise. I actually have to get back to work in Seattle and if you decide that Jacob will come to the hospital there, I want to travel with him and make sure he settles in properly. I was looking at driving back tomorrow afternoon." I gave everyone a quick kiss and hug bye and as I turned to leave I felt a hand tug at my pants.

"Can I have a big kiss and hug too please Bella?" Maddy asked with her big brown eyes looking hopeful.

I knelt down next to her and wrapped my arms around her in the biggest hug I could give her at the moment. To be completely honest with myself I didn't think I could let go. She was mine and this is the first time that I was holding her properly. Before I knew it tears had escaped my eyes.

All at once, all the love I had repressed after Charlie had taken her from me had come flooding back. I knew that the decision to make her a big part of my life was the right one.

I let go of Maddy and locked eyes on Emily giving her a knowing look, silently telling her that she needed to tell Maddy everything.

I gave Jake a hug and kiss on the cheek and left. I was hoping that Alice would come back to the motel telling me that I can take Jacob back to Seattle with me. I had to get out of this god forsaken town.

~X~X~X~X~

As soon as Edward and I walked into my room, I went to lie on the bed. The emotions of the day had exhausted me but also I still had a lot more tears to shed, so it seemed. I felt the bed dip down behind me and Edward's arms wrap around me. He was shushing me in my ears. It felt so good to lie in his arms like this.

Before I knew it I turned to face him. I gazed into his gorgeous emerald green eyes and gave him a sad smile.

"Thank you for your support today. I don't know if I could have gone through all that alone. Is it so wrong of me to feel like this?" I was pleading with him to say no, to say that it was ok and he felt the same.

"It's not wrong Bella..." And there it was. I got what I wanted. I needed him and I needed to touch him and feel him. He makes me feel so safe and warm and loved. My god... could I be falling for him?

"... I know what you are feeling. And there is no where I would rather be than with you comforting you like I should. In the short time I have known you, you mean a lot to me. I care about you deeply and please know that you aren't alone. I will always be here for you." His eyes showed me that he was being truthful in his statement. I could see the passion and intensity in his eyes.

I tilted my face towards him and leaned in gently for a kiss. Edward responded immediately. He pressed his lips to mine and it felt like our lips were meant to be touching and they moulded together. I took his bottom lip and sucked on it a little. He grazed his tongue over my top lip and I parted my lips giving him entrance to my mouth. Our tongues caressed each other passionately. I was pouring all my emotions in this one kiss. He had to know how I felt. How much he meant to me. How much I wanted him at this moment. Our kiss intensified throughout our being. I cupped his face and twined my fingers through his hair. He wasn't close enough.

Edward brought his hands on my back pressing me closer to him. I started unbuttoning his shirt slowly, without breaking from our kiss. Edward's hands roamed all over my back and as he was gliding his hands down my sides he grazed my breasts. I moaned in response and I could feel him smile. His touch was electrifying... even through clothes.

Edward tugged at my top and we only separated from our kiss long enough to pull my top over my head. Then he came crashing back to kiss me with more passion than before. I could feel his arousal on my thigh. Edward started kissing down my neck gently sucking with each kiss. He nibbled on my ear which sent my body on fire. I could feel myself get wetter waiting for Edward to touch me and make me fly. "Fuck, that feels so good, Edward. Ungh!"

EPOV

Bella's hands went from tugging in my hair to caressing my chest. She would run her nails up and down my chest and the feeling sent shocks all down my body. One body part in particular was receiving the feeling and standing to attention. God I don't think I could get any harder.

As I was kissing down her neck and towards her breasts, her little moans were making my dick twitch. I was straining in my pants and I needed release soon. If only I could will her hands to touch me. I nuzzled her perky breasts gently biting at one of her nipples through her bra while pinching the other with my thumb and forefinger. Fuck it, this bra has got to go!

Using my free hand l moved around to her back and undid her bra guiding the straps down her shoulders and threw it over my shoulder to the floor with our tops. I went back to sucking and biting one nipple and rolling the other and alternating until she was writhing under me. "Fuck you are so beautiful Bella. You deserve to be worshipped."

I looked into her eyes and saw a tear escape down the side of her face. "What's wrong baby?" Was I going to fast? Was I hurting her? Did she not want this? But she started it. I am just continuing and cherishing her. The way she deserves to be.

"No, it has been so long since I have been with a man..."

BANG...BANG...BANG...

"Open the door Bella and Edward" OMG Alice and Jasper are back.

We scrambled off the bed to get our clothes on. "Fucking cockblocking sons of bitches" we gaped at each other in surprise.

"Coming hold your horses" I yelled at them. Bella ran to the bathroom and started the shower to make out that we weren't doing anything wrong. If only I could be in there with her. I will have to take care of my little or should I say big problem.

I opened the door... "What's wrong? Why the banging? Can't you knock like normal people?" I was irritated... they stopped a good thing.

"Where's Bella? I have to talk to you guys!" Alice was practically jumping with anticipation of the news she was about to deliver.

"Bella is taking a shower. She should be out soon. What's going on?"

"Have to tell you together. She may be happy or she may be confused. I don't know but she needs to know and she needs to know now."

Alice went over to the bathroom door "Hey B, are you almost done? I need to talk to you about something."

"Be out in a minute," Bella replied through the door.

* * *

So there you have it... What does Alice know and is excited to tell Bella and Edward about.

FIC REC'S

Paper Cutouts by twisted Coincidence owns me at the moment.  
Summary: Bella prefers the virtual to the actual, but feels herself being tugged from the safety of her online realm into the world of a rough edged Edward. This time she'll write her own story. Collab with astilbe13 AH/AU

Also The Sun by AstonMartinVanquish  
"After a whirlwind romance in New York with banker Edward that ended badly...Bella and Edwards paths cross again four years later..., but this time they both have secrets to share!"

Till next time... xxx


	7. More than Friends

**A/N: Thank you for being patient with me while i wrote this chapter. Life as I know it has taken it's toll on me and my family. I have a really sick baby that had to be taken into hospital since the last chapter. She has also been sick with the flu and in the mean time had her 1st birthday! My three year old son had his tonsils out during this time as well. As i said life is taking it's toll on me and when i don't have a chance to write i get writers block. But it is finally finished.**

**Thank you to my Beta Eddzie... I love you to bits. You are the best and thank you for your encouragment. **

**I hope you enjoy this as much as i enjoyed writing it. **

* * *

BPOV

"I'll be out in a minute Alice" I shouted through the door. God I hope Edward made himself decent before opening the door.

What the fuck have I done? I shouldn't have been playing with fire. Edward is engaged and I almost had sex with him. But it felt so right. It felt like we belonged together. It's like we fit together like two pieces of a puzzle. Could He have been the missing piece of my life?

I had to get myself together... I had to go out there and make out that nothing went on between Edward and me. I took a deep breath and walked out into the room. Out of nowhere came an exuberant Alice bouncing up and down...

"Bella, you will never guess what happened after you left the hospital. Come you have to sit down." I smiled at Alice's enthusiasm.

"What's up babe? What is so exciting that you have to almost break the door down? I heard you from the shower." Laughing at Alice as she feigned anger, because the look on her face was a funny sight... her eyes were angry but the half smile she had on her lips went up to her eyes and she tried hard to purse her lips.

"Well, do you want to know or what? I can just not tell you, you know."

"Yes Alice, we love you and we want to know what you know." singing the words before laughing. I spoke for Edward as well because looking at Jasper he smiled with a knowing look. He knew what Alice was about to tell us.

"Well, after you left the hospital and gave Maddy that huge hug, Emily went outside the room to call Sam. Don't know what was said but when she came back in she didn't look happy. Maddy asked Emily what was wrong and she said that there is a problem and they needed to talk to her when Sam gets back. Maddy knows something is wrong and she is a very bright child. It won't be long before she figures it out on her own. We left before Sam came to the hospital so don't know what happened after that.

Oh one other thing, Billy and Sue spoke to Jake when he woke up about going to the hospital in Seattle and they said yes. So go ahead and organise the transfer for him." Excitement poured off Alice's demeanour.

"Hopefully, Emily has taken my warning seriously and will tell Maddy before I leave tomorrow. I will call Carlisle now and get him to make the necessary arrangements for Jake. I want to travel with him tomorrow so I will be heading back to Seattle. Sorry guys, I know that you took a week off work to be here for us and I thank you for that. I hope we haven't spoilt your time away. You can stay for the rest of the week if you want and I will pay for your rooms. Also thank you Edward for being with me through this whole ordeal. You are a great listener and friend. I'm going to make that call now before I get too sentimental." With the tears welling in my eyes I turned to go outside for some privacy while I rang Carlisle. This was turning out to be a very emotional few days.

"Hello... Carlisle?"

"Hello Bella. How are you? And more importantly how is Jacob?"

"Jacob is still the same and his parents have agreed to let him come to Seattle hospital. They needed to get back to work and they thought that it was better if he was with Alice and I so that we could keep an eye on him." I was trying to keep my voice upbeat but it was failing me. I could hear my voice crack every now and then.

"That's good to hear... I will make the arrangements now and hopefully he will be transferred tomorrow afternoon. But Bella, how are you? You don't sound excited that he will be following you!" There was genuine concern in his voice.

"A lot has happened in the few days that I have been here. I hope you don't mind but I kind of hired Edward as my lawyer." I need to tell him everything and he needs to know where my emotional state is at the moment.

"I don't mind that Edward is your lawyer but you are not in any trouble with the law are you?" I almost laughed at his comment, but he had the fatherly concern in his voice.

"No not in any trouble with the law... that would be really hard for me because my father is the chief of police here in Forks. I can explain if you want and then you could let me know if you still want me to be a part of your team." I was concerned that once he knew the truth that he wouldn't want my problems at work. I am usually good at keeping my work and personal life separated but now that I know that my daughter is with her father, and the fact that I didn't know about it makes me wonder if I can actually keep both my lives separate.

"Bella dear, you can tell me anything and just so you know there isn't anything that can change my mind about you and your work ethics. You are a wonderful person and Edward seems taken with you. If he knows what is going on and is still willing to help you then I am inclined to have the same opinion as my son." My God, why couldn't Carlisle be my father instead of Charlie?

"Long story short, when I was sixteen I went out with a boy that we knew and I believed it when he told me that he loved me and I made a mistake and I thought I was ready to sleep with him but then asked him to stop but he didn't. He ended up raping me and when I found out that I was pregnant, my parents weren't happy and I told them what happened. They didn't believe me. My father is the chief of police and he took Sam's word over his daughter. I found out that he was seeing another girl who he said that he fell in love with but she couldn't have children. He basically told me that he got me pregnant so that the baby could be for them. My mother was embarrassed and took me to Phoenix to have the baby and once she was born my father took her away. I told them I wanted to keep her but they didn't listen to me. I saw her when I went to visit Jake and she looks so much like me. I want her back and I asked if Edward could help me. We went to see my parents to find out what legal papers or agreements that were signed and found out that my father forged my signature. So basically Sam has to tell Madison that I am her mother before I leave for Seattle tomorrow. Then I want to make arrangements to get her back and catch up on lost time." I took a deep breath not realising that I hardly took a breath when telling my shortened story.

"My God Bella, are you alright? Are you sure that you want to come back so soon? You have been through an ordeal and I'm sure Madison would like to get to know you a bit before you leave her again."

"I'm fine. Actually this was the first time I have told my story without crying. I needed you to know because I have hired Edward to help me get her back. If you think that there is a conflict of interest in me working for you and hiring Edward please let me know. I would hate to lose my job over this but I will do my very best in making sure that my problems at home stay at home. I will still act professional at work..." I tried my best to convince Carlisle that I can still do my job.

"Bella, take a breath. I know that you will be professional and there is no conflict of interest here. I still want you to take the rest of the week off and try and sort some things out with Edward and then when you come back next Monday you will have most things taken care of. Can I ask you one thing Bella?" Carlisle sounded a little hesitant.

"Sure you can. I don't want there to be any secrets between us as we work closely together."

"How is your relationship with your parents now? I mean you told me about their betrayal to you but have they tried to make amends with you?"

"To be honest Carlisle, I no longer have parents. They not only took my baby away from me but they visited her and acted like grandparents to her without me knowing. I want to make sure that they pay for the pain that they caused me and for all the heartache and anguish that I have had to deal with for five years. They helped set me and Alice up here as a payout for keeping my child away from me. Do you think I'm over reacting?" I valued his opinion on this matter because I suddenly realised that his concern for me is genuine and he felt like a father I never had. My dad wasn't much of a father to me so it feels nice.

"Not at all... you are entitled to your feelings and no matter what happened the way you were treated is not to be taken lightly. I'm sure that Edward will help you anyway he can. Jasper included. I know that you all have become good friends, especially when Edward would leave at the drop of a hat to see you and support you." I sighed and marvelled in the knowledge that someone actually cares about me.

"Thank you Carlisle for all your concern. I will come up with Jacob and see you sometime tomorrow afternoon. Is it still ok of I take the rest of the week off and then come back to work on Monday? I have an appointment with Rosalie next week and I want to be back for her. I just need to sort some things out with Edward and then I can come back with a clear head. I also need to talk to you about something." I needed to know and execute the next step in getting my daughter back and also making my parents pay for all the anguish and heartache they caused for the last five years.

"Take as long as you need. I can get Tanya to look after Rose if you like. Spend time with Jacob and sort out your personal life. Is there something you wanted to talk about now?" It was nice to hear concern in his voice. He acted like a father to me and he has only met me. That is saying so much,

"No I want or should I say need to be back to work. I need to talk to you in person. There are too many people here and I wanted to talk to you in private. I'll speak to you tomorrow."

"Okay then Bella, make sure you drive safe. I'll be waiting for Jacob to come and will be looking forward in meeting the infamous Jacob and Alice. You have spoken so much about them that it would be good to put a face to the name."

"Thank you Carlisle for everything. See you some time tomorrow. Good night."

"Good night Bella"

I stayed outside for a moment longer taking deep breaths and just focusing on what tomorrow may bring. All I knew is that I need to focus on getting Maddy and getting her back.

As much as I wanted to focus on Maddy, my mind drifted to Edward. God he is gorgeous... he has the most breathtaking green eyes and I love his tousled bronze hair. While I was daydreaming it suddenly occurred to me that we almost had sex. But having his lips on me felt so good. I would love to feel him inside me. On my god I have to stop thinking about that... He is engaged. I have to remember that before I go too far.

But I feel this connection to him. I feel the electricity between us when he touches me. He is so attentive to my needs at the moment and we can easily have a conversation. Granted, lately it has been about my issues but I want to know about him. I want to know what he likes and doesn't like, what his hobbies are, if he has any. More importantly I want to know what he meant when he said that he was re-evaluating his feelings and needed a break from Tanya. I wonder what she is like with him for him not to know how he feels about her.

If he was mine, I would make sure his every need is met, emotionally, physically and sexually. God what I want to do to him, with him. Actually there isn't much I wouldn't do. I would most likely be putty in his hands.

I need to talk to him... I need to let him know that what happened can't happen again. As much as I would love for him to be mine, I refuse to ruin his relationship. He knows my deepest darkest secrets and he is staying by my side wanting to help me through this.

"...Bella? Did you hear what I said?" Alice looked at me apprehensively.

"Sorry Alice just lost in my thoughts. Carlisle is making arrangements for Jacob to be transferred and I will be going back with him tomorrow afternoon. Are you coming back with me?" I turned to face the nearly empty parking lot of the motel and waited for her to reply.

"Of course I'm coming back with you. I can't stand looking at Sam let alone be in the same room as him at the moment. Besides I want to see if Jasper can help me find my real parents. I have been in Seattle for over a week and I haven't even made a start." Alice was positive that she could find her real parents. From the digging she had done while she was still in Forks, she found out that her parents were in Seattle. That kind of sealed the deal with us moving to Seattle.

"Hey Ali, can I ask you something?" She nodded and I continued, "Is there something going on with you and Jasper? I know you didn't sleep in our room last night and I noticed that Edward's bag is in the room because I saw it this morning." I was curious... what can I say? If Alice is getting some then I want to live precariously through her love life. As much as I love being with Edward and I love his company, I know deep down that we can't be together. I care deeply for him but I can't allow myself to let go and fall head over heels for him completely. Fuck me! I think I have... I think I lo... I can't... I need it to stop... he can't know... oh my god what do I do?

"Jasper and I like each other a lot. I know that I am going to marry him some day. He doesn't know it yet but he is it for me. But last night Edward came into their room after you had fallen asleep to get some clothes to change into. He wanted to stay with you and keep an eye on you. He is such a gentleman. Anyway god this is so embarrassing..." Alice's cheeked flushed and she smiled looking away from me.

I smirked knowingly at her but couldn't help but ask "what? What is so embarrassing?" I started to giggle like a little school girl.

"Jasper and I were humping like bunnies, alright? It was so good. He knows how to hit all the right spots..."

"Alice enough with the description. I just wanted to know about Edward's bag."

"Well Edward kind of walked in on us. I screamed and according to Edward he doesn't think that bleach is strong enough to scrub the images of us from his brain. Okay miss 'I need to know everything'? So what is happening between you and Edward?" Alice smiled cheekily while putting her hands on her hips. I was waiting for the foot tap to start.

"Honestly Alice, I don't know. I like him, like really like him, to the point that I think I have feelings for him. Absurd yeah? He is engaged and I realise that he can never be mine but it felt like he wanted something to happen between us as well. Actually you kind of cock blocked us. If you hadn't knocked on the door I'm sure something would have happened. I need to talk to him about everything that has happened and what he meant when he said that he was re-evaluating his feelings. It makes me sad to know that the person he has these so called feelings for is not fulfilling his needs as a man and a person. How can you marry someone that makes you want to re-evaluate how you feel about them? Surely after seven years of being in a relationship together he would know... I mean he did propose." I was rambling and Alice knew I was about to have a panic attack. After all the stress I have been through over the past few days, my panic attacks were coming back. I hadn't had one since I was eighteen and I was starting to get over my huge ordeal.

"B hun, take a breath..." she said with a giggle. " I know that you like him and it is evident that he likes you. For someone to know what you went through and stick by you and even just the way he looks at you. He can't keep his eyes off you and they have so much emotion and passion in them. Can I tell you something that Jasper told me but you can't let Edward know that you know?" I nodded so that Alice could continue. She lowered her voice "Edward spoke to his dad about not being sure about her. He also told Jasper that he has this major boner for you. It's like whenever you go in the same room as him he gets hard." I looked at Alice in confusion. And I started to giggle. Obviously they didn't know that whenever I see him I suddenly get wet and my girlie parts throbs with excitement.

"That's funny Ali, because just his look and gorgeous crooked smile make me all hot and bothered. I want to be the one he comes home to at night. I want him to share everything with me. I want to have a family with him. I know I can't have children but maybe he can look beyond that and love me for who I am on the inside and not what is missing. We can try different methods of having children like surrogacy or adoption. I want a child that looks like him though." It felt like I was going to have another panic attack when Alice put her hand on my shoulder.

"Breathe B... He knows all about you and your past and he still looks like he wants to eat you. It is quite sickening to see the both of you look at each other with googly eyes and not do a damn thing about it. Fuck, B he wants you bad! You have to be blind Bella to not see it." Alice was smirking and I feigned a frown at her little bit of sarcasm.

"How about we go in and see what the boys want to do for dinner? I'm actually quite hungry." I gave Alice a hug and smiled at her. God I love my best friend. I'm so glad I told her everything and her little clues about Edward's fiancé has given me some insight on Edward and his relationship.

We walked back inside arm in arm... above all she is still my best friend and I should never have doubted her friendship with me over something that was out of my control. I tried hard to put a smile on my face and gave Jasper and Edward a hug. "Thank you" I whispered to both of them. They have been so supportive and mean so much to me.

"How about we grab some dinner? What does everyone feel like? We could go out or order in." I was trying to sound so upbeat but it wasn't working.

"If you girls are going back tomorrow, then I want some quality alone time with my girl." Jasper exclaimed and looked straight at Alice.

"So you guys are an item now? Could have told me Ali... I'm so happy for you both. Ok so we're eating in... What do we want?"

"Chinese..."

"Thai..."

"Pizza..."

We all laughed as everyone gave their suggestions at the same time. "Come on guys we have to make a decision..." I said still laughing at the coincidence.

"Does everyone like Chinese?" Edward asked, it was his initial suggestion and I think he wanted to see everyone struggle using chopsticks. That would be his perverse way of having a laugh at everyone's expense.

"Yeah cool... but I'm using a fork. I can't use chopsticks if my life depended on it." I stated matter of factly.

Alice and Jasper agreed providing they could use forks as well. Edward sulked telling us that we are mocking the whole tradition of having Chinese food. And then proceeded to beg us to try to use chopsticks. Like hell I was.

We ate... we laughed and they agreed to come back to Seattle with us. They didn't want to stay here if we weren't. I really needed to talk to Edward and it had to be tonight. I won't be the other woman.

Alice and Jasper went to their room, I say their room because they haven't been apart since the guys got here. Now was my chance to really talk to Edward. He has been affectionate towards me tonight by either rubbing circles on the back of my hand or rubbing my back gently. And just being close to me. I could feel the energy between us and if I don't talk about everything now I'm going to end up in bed with him.

Edward got up and grabbed my hand and walked me towards the bed.

"Edward, I think we really need to talk... I can't do this and be the other woman. You have a fiancé and I can't interfere with that. We really need to talk about what is going on with us."

"Bella, you aren't the other woman. I feel a really strong connection between us that I can't explain. It's like we are meant to be here... like this. Please tell me you feel it too!"

"I feel the connection too but you are in a relationship. I can't do this. What did you mean the other day when you needed to re-evaluate your feelings?" Hopefully he will tell me what I need to hear. That he wants to be with me and not her.

"I have been with Tanya for seven years. It feels like she just wants to be with me for my money. We don't have a real relationship... it's like she wants to show me off to all her friends like I'm some piece of arm candy. I don't want to be that guy. I only proposed because I didn't think there was anyone else out there for me. That wanted to be with me for me. That wasn't interested in my money. Tanya is like that. I didn't know if I wanted to be with her anymore. I know I don't now. I met you! I spoke to my dad about all this the day I took rose in for her appointment with you. Bella, I noticed you and wanted to find out so much about you that I was grilling Rose after the appointment to try and get as much info as I could. Rose doesn't like Tanya very much but she loves you. Fuck even my dad loves you." He held my hand and spoke to me with passion in his eyes.

"Edward in the short time I have known you, I have very strong feelings for you. I can't stop them and I really want to explore them more. But the fact that you are still in a relationship bothers me..." I started to explain but Edward cut me off.

"Hey, I want to be with you if you will have me. I was going to wait until I got back to Seattle to break up with Tanya, but I can call her now and do it."

"No, don't. You should wait until you go back. When we go back I have already arranged with Carlisle that I have the rest of the week off. Is it possible that we get together and talk about us and where we stand and also work out our next step in getting my daughter back?"

"Sure thing baby, but I need to talk to Tanya first when I get back. I don't want to delay this anymore than necessary. But I would really like to continue what we started earlier. Fuck, you are so beautiful. I could spend the rest of my life lying next to you naked."

I crashed my lips to his and started kissing him with as much passion as I could muster. My tongue sought entrance into his mouth and once he allowed it, our tongues were moving together. Tasting, touching, each one trying to let the other know that there was wanting and fervour in each caress of our tongues.

Edward's hands started lifting my top and we broke away from our kiss long enough for him to take my top off and I did the same in return. I was not going to be the only one on the receiving end this time. Edward laid me down on the bed and started feathering kisses along my jaw towards my ear and sucking the sensitive part just below. I let out a moan which he took as approval to keep going. He kissed back down my neck and along my collarbone. He was teasing me with each soft kiss and he was taking his time. I wanted him so much. My body was so willingly accepting what he was giving but my mind was shouting warnings.

He started kissing down until he reached the swells of my breasts. He started sucking at one of my nipples through my red lacy bra and squeezed the nipple of my other breast with his thumb and forefinger. I writhed underneath him and moaned in ecstasy. My god, if this continues I'm going to come with just his touch on my breasts. He makes me so wet that I think there is a swimming pool down there. It amazes me how my body responds to him and his touch.

"God... Edward... that feels... so good... Fuck!" What I wouldn't give to have his hands and mouth on my body every day for eternity. It's like his whole body was made for me. It's like he knows exactly what I like and isn't afraid to show me what this could feel like.

He started moving his was down my body kissing my stomach and grabbed the waistband of my yoga pants. My body felt like it was lit on fire with excitement that he was so close to me. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest and my breathing hitched. He pulled my pants down and sat back taking in the sight before him. I mentally congratulated myself for wearing matching bra and panties because that was all I had on. Edward looked like he was about to devour me and god I hoped he did.

Edward started kissing my inner thighs and I could feel myself get wetter and the throbbing was more prominent. I gasped when he kissed me on the outside of my panties. "Fuck Bella you are so wet for me. I want to taste you, you smell so sweet. Can I taste you please? So delicious!"

"Mmm Hmm..." Edward pulled down my panties and hummed in delight.

He traced his tongue over my wet pussy and nipped at my bud. I gasped and writhed beneath Edward. "My God that feels good." I ran my hands through his hair and tugged on his gorgeous bronze locks. He makes my skin all tingly and has awakened all my senses. Each kiss, each gentle caress, and every word spoken with passion and emotion heightened my senses. I couldn't get enough of Edward, I couldn't get enough of his touches and his velvety voice, and how it brings me to my knees. A part of me knows that I should stop what we are doing but it just feels right. Like we are two pieces of a puzzle that are meant to be together.

He sucked my clit and I heard a moan escape from his throat. Before I knew what was happening, I felt him insert his tongue and then nibble at my nub. I gasped at the feeling of his tongue fucking me. I arched my back off the bed and the sensations intensified. "Oh God... Fuck... Edward... you... this feels... fucking fantastic..." I couldn't make a coherent sentence... with each word he thrust his tongue into me. I could feel my heat building to breaking point. I don't think I could handle much more.

"Ed... Edward... God... I'm so... close...please Edward... I need you!" I felt him smile as he continued to thrust and suck. He brought his fingers up and rubbed my nub in the right spot using just the right amount of pressure. "Come for me baby... I need you to come in my mouth..." with one last flick of his tongue I screamed his name as he brought me to my release.

As I was coming down from my intense orgasm I looked towards him and saw his smile glistening from my juices and he was licking his lips while he looked me in the eye. He crawled up the bed to meet my gaze. We looked into each other's eyes for what seemed like an hour but was more like a few seconds. I thought I caught a glimpse of something more than lust and desire.

I leaned in to give Edward a kiss. "My God, Edward… no… one… has… ever… made… me… feel… like… that… before." I kiss him with each word muttered out of my mouth.

He looked at me with a smile of satisfaction. He knew exactly what he needed to do to make me feel like I was not just an object to satisfy his needs with. He showed me affection beyond anything that I have ever experienced in my life. I think I just fell in love with him more than I already do. But I can't tell him that. Not now. Not when he is still with her.

I decided to get out of my head for a while and reciprocate what I have just received. Our kisses became more passionate. I rolled him over so that he was lying on his back. I started kissing down his jaw towards his ear. I nibbled on his ear lobe and I heard him gasp. I whispered in his ear "Do you like it when I do that, Edward?" God what has he done to me. I have never been this bold in asking what the person liked and this is definitely something I wouldn't have felt comfortable doing to someone. This is the first time I will be giving a guy a blow job. Edward has completely made me want him so much in such a short amount of time.

"God yes Bella. Fuck... what are you doing to me?" I could hear the excitement in his voice, but his last comment made me stop and question myself.

I knelt down next to him and look him in his eyes. There was lust and passion in them. _What could he be thinking then? It looks like he wants me but I can't be sure now._

"Bella, what's wrong baby?"

"Did I do something wrong?" Edward looked confused at my question so I had to elaborate. "You asked what am I doing to you." He registered what I was saying and he gave me a crooked smile his voice velvety and sexy. "You are doing everything right. It's like you know what I like and you home in to those spots and... Well feel what you are doing to me!" With that he grabbed my hand and put it to his pants. I felt his cock bulging through his pants. My eyes widened in awe. He felt so bug through his pants... I started feeling excited, like a child opening her presents on Christmas morning.

I smiled back and went to kissing him again. This time I went from his ear down his neck and along his collarbone. Feathering open mouthed kisses as I made my way down. I kissed down his perfectly toned chest to his nipples. I took one in my mouth and sucked a little before grazing it with my teeth and blowing air on the wetness created from my mouth. He hissed through his teeth and as I gazed up I could see that it is taking all his strength not to attack me. I gave the same attention to his other nipple and then kissed lightly down to his belly button. I stuck my tongue inside and blew air there as well.

I made my way down to the top of his pants. This is it... I was finally unwrapping my present and hopefully giving him a present in return. I am hoping that I can pull this off without him ever thinking that it was my first time.

I unzipped his pants and he lifted his hips so that I cam shimmy his pants off. I took in the enormous bulge in his boxers and I was eager to see what was in store for me. I palmed him over the fabric and grabbed his cock gently pumping him up and down.

Edward fisted the sheets as he moaned in ecstasy. "Bella that is just so...fuck... and you're not even touching me. God help me when you do." I smiled knowing that I had that kind of effect on a man. Especially a man as gorgeous as Edward is.

I pumped him a few more times before I stopped. He drew a breath in from lack of contact. I ran my fingers along his waistband and gently tugged them down, exposing his length. Fuck me... he was huge. How was I supposed to fit that in my mouth? Even still, if we get to the stage of intimacy how is his dick supposed to fit inside me. It will rip me apart. At least I would die a happy woman.

I grabbed his length and rubbed the tip gathering the pre cum rubbing it along his length. I kissed the tip of his cock and ran my tongue down the length. I sucked gently on his balls and flicked them with my tongue before running my tongue back up his length. I licked the tip of his dick and took him in my mouth as far as I could allow. Little Edward can't all fit in my mouth, so I grabbed the end of his shaft and as I started bobbing up and down, my hand was pumping the rest of him in time. Edward groaned which sounded more like a growl from deep within his throat and grabbed my hair.

Edward guided my head up and down to a pace that gives him the most satisfaction without making me gag. Going down I ran my tongue along the shaft and on my way back up again I swirled my tongue over the tip while sucking. Edward moaned, "Fuck Bella, just like that... god it feels so good... the best... Mmmmm..."

I gave myself a little pat on the back knowing that I am doing something right. My pace increased with some guidance from Edward.

"Fuck ... I'm so close... I don't think I can hold on much longer..." Edward started thrusting his hips to meet with each thrust of my mouth. I grazed the tip of his cock with my teeth and I could feel him twitch and get harder. His pants and groans were getting louder and faster. He silently encouraged me to continue what I am doing... then he gave a deep thrust and stiffened. He gave three more hard thrusts grunting with each trust and then he screamed my name. I felt the warm sticky cum hit the back of my throat and I swallowed the salty goodness with every spurt.

I continued to suck all the cum from his dick and Edward relaxed into the bed. I crawled up his body feathering kisses along the way while looking into his eyes. He seemed relaxed in his post-coital glow. I looked into his eyes before devouring his mouth with mine. He hummed in response to my boldness. Each caress of our tongues was done with so much passion and emotion.

Reluctantly I pulled back pecking his lips a few times before smiling at him. "My God Bella, that was amazing. No one has ever done that for me before." I was shocked and I think he noticed my jaw drop before I could pick myself up and quickly close my mouth. "I'm serious... not even Tanya has done that for me. She says that she doesn't want to degrade herself."

"I don't know what to say..." and I didn't. How could anyone not appreciate Edward and want to give him as much pleasure as I felt? He made me see stars and the moon. I felt lighter like I was floating and I wanted to give him the same experience, or at least try. "I mean, I can't believe no one has ever pleasured you. At least I know that I don't have much to live up to in ways of experience because I have never done that to anyone. Since having Madison, I haven't really had many relationships and the ones I did have were rarely sexual. You made me see stars and it was the best experience I have ever had. Thank you." I felt the blush creep along my face and down to my breasts. I can't believe I just told him about all my sexual in-experiences.

Edward wrapped me up in his arms as I laid my head on his chest listening to his heart beat. Our legs intertwined and I moved up slightly to pull the cover over us. "Bella, for someone that hasn't ever done that... fuck you seemed to know what you were doing. Everything you did made all my senses heighten. It was beautiful and wonderful and absolutely satisfying. Don't ever doubt yourself." I looked into Edward's eyes looking for any hint that he wasn't being truthful but all I saw was sincerity and I knew he was being genuine.

"Edward, we can't keep doing this though. As much as I loved it and loved doing it to you, we can't. You are in a relationship and I can't be the other woman. I can't live like that. You mean so much to me already that I'm afraid that I will fall deeper and only get hurt. I have to see your dad when I get back. I need to talk to him about what has been going on with me and I think I should let him know about how I feel about you. I don't want there to be any secrets in regards to me because I love my job. I need it to show that I have a stable work and home environment so I can get Maddy." I was starting to ramble and Edward shushed me with kisses on top of my head.

"Hey... Hey... please Bella, don't get upset. In the really short time I have known you I have strong feelings for you. Believe me when I say that I have every intention of breaking up with Tanya, but I don't want it to cause problems with you at work."

"Why would it cause problems for me Edward?" I think this is where Edward is going to tell me about Tanya being my co-worker. I tried to keep my voice calm and inquisitive not understanding what was being said.

"Tanya works with you. Did you not know baby?"

I feigned a shock expression because I had put two and two together when I was speaking to Alice earlier. "No I didn't. She hasn't exactly been very welcoming of me and she is a little upset at me that I am looking after Rose. She stops talking when I enter the room and I have vaguely heard that she was engaged but I didn't know it was you. She was so excited to talk about it. You can't break her heart like that. It would crush her."

"She doesn't love me anymore. She doesn't want to spend time together and when I told her I was going away for a week she didn't question me as to where I was going and with whom or even ask why. She wants to be married to my money. My parents are wealthy with old money... I'm a lawyer and I make a lot of money and Tanya liked the concept that once we are married she doesn't have to work. She can go out and spend the money I work hard to make. So by breaking it off with her now I can pay her a severance for the time we have been together but I don't have to give her half my wealth, or inheritance. Please don't think that I am boasting because I'm not. I don't want you to think that that is what I think about you. I want to spend a lifetime getting to know you and at the same time it is like you have been the person I have been waiting a lifetime for. I am addicted to you Bella Swan. It is like you are my own personal brand of heroin. Please don't quit on us just yet. Can you wait until we get back to Seattle and talk to my dad? I want to be there when you speak to him. I need for him to understand what I feel as well so that you are not battling this alone. I agree that he needs to know but I really don't want Tanya to give you a hard time when she finds out about us. Then you can make a decision about what you want. Please Bella?"

How could I not grant him this? I feel like he is my forever and I would fight for us if he wanted me to. I now realise that I would do anything he asks of me because I love him. I honestly love him. If he is willing to talk to his dad with me then I must mean something more to him as well.

"Ok Edward. I won't give up on us. It would be nice for you to be there so I can talk to your dad and have you there to give me strength. You are my rock and you have kept me from falling apart over these last few days."

"I can't break up with Tanya straight away. Just give me a few days and it will be done ok?" I nodded in acceptance because I can't ask him anymore than what he is willing to give me.

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**Thank you for reading this chapter. I would love to know what you think.**

**Fic Rec's:**

**Take the Ice by Bellamarie117 - i totally fell in love with this story... once i started reading it i couldn't stop. **


	8. Confessions

**A/N: I really apologise for this chapter being so late since the last update. R/L has been a bitch to me since i last updated. I don't want to make excuses but i have had bullying issues with my daughter, writer's block, wedding invitations, getting my business up and running, Christmas, New Year, 18th birthday invitations, my grandmother dying and we went overseas for 2 months on a holiday visiting my in-laws. My father-in-law has dementia at 63 and looking after him and 3 kids has taken it's toll on me. I have finally been able to finish my chapter and update for you.**

**Thank you for all your patience and for sticking with me. There has been a lot of people reading my story and it would be good to know your thoughts. How am i fairing with my first story?**

**Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns all that is twilight, but i own this story. **

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**Edward**

It felt good and right to wake up with Bella in my arms. Last night was amazing and it was something that we both needed to get out of our systems. I need to take control of my emotions because even though I am conflicted in how I feel about Tanya, I am still engaged to her and I can't let that happen again. I need to try to distance myself from Bella a bit which may prove difficult seeing as though I am her attorney and I need to contact her at times in dealing with her case.

I need to figure out the best way in getting the most out of the hurt and anguish she has had over the last 5 years. We will have to discuss the outcome she wants to achieve and if she wants to have sole custody of Maddy.

Maddy… what a beautiful child! She is gorgeous. She has the most soulful deep brown eyes that could suck you in and she can easily manipulate you into doing what she wants. She can have you wrapped around her little finger with just a look. She has Bella's long mahogany curly hair that is now down to her waist. It's like she hasn't had her hair cut at all. She is all Bella. You can see it in her facial features and also her mannerisms.

I felt Bella start to stir and she nuzzled into my neck a little more. "Edward… thank you!" I just barely heard Bella say. She pulled me out of my musings.

"Hmmm? What did you say?" I asked Bella. I wasn't sure if I had heard her properly.

"Thank you... Edward!" she said in a sleep induced croaky voice.

"What are you thanking me for?" I looked at her and smiled down at her noticing her flutter her eyes open.

"Thank you for being here for me. Thank you for being understanding and for last night. It was incredible and I have never felt so light. Like a weight has lifted off me and all the tension that had been building up in me has suddenly dissipated. You didn't need to take my case and I have to ask one thing though because I need to know... how much would it cost me to see my case through?" She sounded a little hesitant at the latter of her ramblings.

"Bella, firstly... you're welcome and to be honest last night was incredible. In regards to your case it can cost between five thousand and twenty thousand dollars, depending on how much time is put into the case." I saw the look of surprise on her face. I don't think she had any idea of the costs involved around custody cases. But I couldn't charge her that much, especially when she hasn't done anything wrong. "But in saying that... if I talk to my boss I'm sure we can get it done pro bono."

"Nuh uh, no, not going to happen. You told me roughly how much it costs, I know I have only been working technically for a week and had this time off but I want to pay you. I need to pay you. I can't accept this for free. I don't want to feel as though I owe you something. I'm sorry and I hope you understand but I need to do this. I can't let Sam and Charlie and Renee think that you only did this for free for sexual favours and then they find me an unfit parent. I need stability." Bella was rambling but I understood where she was coming from. I would probably feel the same way if I was in the same position.

Before I could answer Bella's ramblings, my phone rang. I looked at the screen for caller id and it was Carlisle. I suddenly had a bad feeling. God I hope Esme is ok.

"Hello Dad, what's up?"

"Hey son, um... what time do you think you will be back today? There is something important you need to know and I would rather tell you in person." He sounded distressed, and there was some urgency in his voice.

"Dad what's going on? Is everything ok with Rose and Mum? I should be there early afternoon by the time we get to the hospital and transport Jake to Seattle. Also I need to be with Bella when she speaks to Sam. This meeting could go either way and as her attorney I need to be there. She needs the moral support as well as the legal advice on what she can and can't say. Is that ok? We can come and see you as soon as we get to the hospital.

"Edward, Rose and your mother are fine. It has to do with someone else. It should be fine... please make sure that when you get here that you come and see me. Let me know when you aren't too far away and I will make sure I meet the patient transport ambulance at the emergency department. See you then and drive safe."

"Will do dad. Speak to you soon." I hung up the phone curious as to who could get dad so riled up and needing to urgently speak to me. I brushed the thoughts to the back of my mind as I needed to focus on Bella this morning.

"Hey Bella, my father needs to speak with me as soon as we get to Seattle and he said it is kind of urgent... what time are you meeting Sam and the doctors at the hospital?" I wasn't too sure how long these meetings would go for but I wanted to try and get to Seattle as soon as possible. What can I say... curiosity killed the cat ten fold with me.

"I was meeting them at the hospital soon to go over Jake's treatment and recovery. Sam was going to meet me there so that while they discharge Jake, I can chat to Sam. I would really like you to be there but if you can't then that's ok. You can go back and see what you father wants. I'm sure if it wasn't urgent he wouldn't have mentioned anything." She cuddled up to me and I knew that she would support me no matter what I chose to do.

I was kind of torn between going with Bella to sort out this mess and going to see my father. But Bella was right. If it was urgent Carlisle would have asked me to come back now.

"Ok Bella, you jump in the shower and get ready and we will try to get to the hospital soon. It is nearing nine o'clock so we need to get a move on. I'll get Jasper and Alice and tell them to get ready as well. Once you're done I'll jump in the shower and we can be out of here in less than thirty. Does that sound like a plan?" I know I was being authoritive but I really wanted to know what my dad wanted. The way I see it the quicker we get this show on the road the better.

"Aye Aye Captain" and she saluted me with her right arm and had a cocky grin on her face.

"Hardy har har, smart ass!" And I smacked her ass on the way to the bathroom.

I headed over to Alice and Jasper's room still with a grin on my face from the little playful interaction that occurred between Bella and me. There is something between Bella and I and I can feel a change in the way our relationship is heading. I really like Bella. She is beautiful in looks and also she has the most beautiful heart and soul you could only dream of having. But she is broken after what her parents did to her as a young lady. Not yet a legal adult. I mainly put the blame of Bella's hurt on Sam. He should have known better than to use someone just to get a baby his real girlfriend couldn't have. And to just cast Bella aside and not give a shit about how she would feel about losing her baby. Charlie and Renee were in the wrong too making Bella give up her baby and even more so forging Bella's signature to hand over all her parental rights to Sam and Emily. This case is going to be huge if Sam wants to put up a fight.

Knocking on the door to Alice's room I could hear scrambling and running and then a door closing. The door opens with Jasper peering out the door wrapped in a sheet. I stifled my laughter as I see him look at me with relief on his face. But I couldn't contain myself and I just laughed at him…

"Fuck man, you couldn't have picked a worse moment. Thanks for the cockblock. Dick" Jasper huffed and I just laughed even louder.

"Once you finish your morning routine, mate, you need to get your asses to ours. We want to be out of here in less than thirty. Need to go to the hospital and also my father needs me to be in Seattle asap as something has happened and is anxious to tell me. Tell Alice to get you off quickly and get your shit together." I turned chuckling to myself as I left Jasper with a look of shock on his face. Those two could hump morning noon and night. This made me increasingly sexually frustrated. After what I experienced last night with Bella, Tanya just doesn't do it for me anymore. I saw stars… and the moon… and the whole fucking planets. It was the best experience of my life. The things she could do with just her mouth… my god I'm getting hard just thinking about it. Fuck! Now I am more frustrated than ever. Have to get my mind out of the gutter.

I have to be tactful in the way I retract my proposal to Tanya because I don't want this to blow up in my face. I have to consider my dad as well as Bella if anyone finds out about us. What am I thinking? There IS no us! At least not yet. I am hoping though that some time in the future there may be an us. I just feel so comfortable around her and I feel at home. There is this amazing chemistry between us that surpasses anything that Tanya and I had.

Why on earth did I propose to Tanya? If only I had sorted out myself before I did anything rash. Now I am going to break her heart. Although I think that this proposal means more to her than it does to me.

As I walked back into our room, Bella was just coming out of the bathroom. Clad in just a towel covering her just enough not to see but leaving a lot to the imagination. And I saw what was under that towel last night. And wasn't it a good sight indeed. Shaking my head to get rid of the impure thoughts I was having, I looked Bella in the eyes and noticed she was smirking at me like she knew where my thoughts were taking me.

"Something take your fancy Mr Cullen?" she playfully asked while putting her hands on her hips, her towel riding up just that little bit further. Just enough to give me a peek at the roundness of her toush. This wonderful lady oozes sex appeal. Looking at her now makes me feel things I thought I would never feel again.

"If only you knew, Bella... If only you knew!" I was being honest with her because she is exactly what I want. I want someone who is sexy and funny and is so full of love and life. I know I haven't known Bella for long but I feel this connection to her. She is so different to Tanya. Sometimes I feel that Tanya loves my money and not me. It's like she expects this marriage to be blissful and an extravagant affair but I don't like things like that. Tanya loves to be the centre of attention but Bella likes to just blend in. She doesn't like the focus to be on her.

I quickly jumped in the shower while Bella finished dressing and packing our bags. She is generous like that. Jasper and Alice knocked on the door soon after I was out of the shower and changed. We drove to the hospital together and grabbed something from the cafeteria before we went to see Jake.

As we walked down the corridor to Jake's room, we saw Sam coming in the opposite direction. Bella stopped when she noticed that Maddy wasn't with him. She looked at me with sadness in her eyes and said "He didn't bring her. I wanted to spend a few moments with her before I had to go back." Tears started streaming down Bella's cheeks and I did my best to wipe them before Sam caught up to us.

"Hey don't cry, let's see what Sam has to say before we ask about your daughter, okay?" I tried to comfort her but I wanted to know what he wanted before I threatened anything legal. Although Bella's signature was forged and technically she still has rights over her child, Sam is technically the father and I need to tread lightly. There is going to have to be some kind of joint custody unless I can find that Sam treated Maddy badly. But she seems happy and she knew that Emily wasn't her real mother. So Sam must have been honest with her as soon as she was able to understand.

"Sam, how are you? Thank you for coming to see us before we left." I thought if I sounded sincere enough he would hopefully play fair without getting the courts involved.

"Hi Bella and Edward, I'm ok I guess. I know you pretty much want to know what was said to Madison last night... well basically you know that she always knew that Emily wasn't her real mother..." Bella nodded her head in affirmation. She looked at me with a look that I took as her confirming that fact. Apparently Maddy asked Bella if she was her mother. "Well last night I told Maddy that you are her real mother but you gave her up for adoption because you were young and couldn't look after her." I held Bella's arm gently because I could literally feel steam coming out of her ears. If we were living a cartoon, you would see the steam.

"Sam, why did you tell those things to Madison? When you know that wasn't the truth. Bella asked one thing of you and that was to tell Maddy the truth. You failed in doing that and now she will have lots of questions for Bella which I will advise that she tell her the truth about what happened. It will not paint you as a saint in the eyes of s four year old. Then once we go to court, because I can tell you know that this can and will go to court if Bella wishes it to. You were a part of this whole scheme in the beginning and you told Bella's parents lies about her and convinced then to help give you the child when she was born. There is a lot of evidence relating to your involvement and also Bella's parents as well.

"Now, what would you like to happen from here Sam? And where is Maddy now?" I started defending Bella's honour and I couldn't stop. I hope Bella doesn't mind my ramblings but I think that he needed to know what can and will happen if things don't change and the truth is told to Maddy.

"Edward, I understand that you may be involved with Bella but this has nothing to do with you. This happens to be between Bella and me..." I had to interrupt because now he was definitely pissing me off. "Sam, despite what you think, I am not involved with Bella. If you really must know about me, I am 28 years old, I am a successful lawyer and I happen to be engaged to one of Bella's co-workers. So please don't start spreading false rumours about Bella and I or _**I**_ _**will**_ take you to court for defamation of character. Bella _**had **_ told me her story and I believe after seeing the forged documents from her parents that she has a good case for custody. She asked for my opinion on the facts and I told her that I will represent her if she wants to pursue any sort of custody over Maddy. So, in saying that will you now answer my questions? I have asked Bella not to say anything to you for now. These are the most important questions that we need answered for now and it will lead her in making a decision about what she wants to do." I took a deep breath because as frustrated and angry as I am, I had to try and stay calm but show Sam that we mean business. That Bella has the best lawyer on her side and as much as he wants to fight it, Bella could easily get some custody of her child.

"Well fine, if you must know, I told Maddy just what she needed to know. That her mother did abandon her as a baby because that is what was told to me. Despite the facts that were found out recently, I didn't feel it was necessary to divulge all the details of how she became ours. She is still legally mine and Emily has adopted her so that should still stand. I have spoken to our lawyer and he states that Maddy is still legally Emily's as well. So I don't know what you intend on doing about this but I will not give her up. She stays with me and I think that unless the courts tell me otherwise, you relinquished your rights once you gave birth. You signed those documents and I have a copy of everything. Don't think that after four years you can just waltz back into town and think you can take what's mine." I looked at Sam for what seemed like minutes with my mouth hanging open wondering _is he really serious?_ I think he is the one that is delusional.

I could see tears well up in Bella's eyes as I glanced towards her and I could sense that she is getting beyond the point of being frustrated to really fucking pissed. Before she could burst into her rant that I know is building up and she can't wait to let loose, I thought I better get in there first so that she doesn't blow our chances. "Sam, I'm sure you heard me before when I told you that Bella has a good case in getting Maddy back. But just to reiterate, Bella's forged documents supersede any formal adoption papers that you may have. I have copies of everything and I am able to get a copy of the adoption papers but to save everyone time and money it would be better to settle this out of court. And if you had a good a lawyer as I am he would have given you the right information. Bella would really like to say bye to Maddy as we are on our way back to Seattle with Jacob. Where is Maddy?" I feel exhausted already and I looked over at Bella and seeing the anticipation in her eyes of seeing her daughter again struck a chord in my heart. Maddy is an adorable little girl and it would be good to officially meet her.

Sam looked down and his shoulders slumped and he looked defeated. he let out a big sigh like he had been holding his breath for a long time and looked Bella in the eyes. "Bella, is this what you really want? I want to know what you have to say because all I have been hearing is what you want from your lawyer. I haven't heard you speak yet and I need to know what you are thinking!"

Bella looked at me and I nodded my head slightly to give her the okay to talk to Sam. Hopefully she can remain calm and not blow up.

"Sam, to be quite honest I am glad that Edward has spoken for me because with what you have said about my daughter and that I had basically abandoned her which we both know isn't true, words cannot describe my feelings for you right now. I am that angry that you would think that when you know that I grieved at losing her because my parents didn't want to be grandparents at a young age. Yet I come here and see that they have been keeping up with their grandparent duties and that all the documentation has been forged... by the chief of police himself. How would you expect me to feel? Would you like me to start dancing around and thanking you for getting me pregnant and taking my child away from me because your wife can't have kids? Seriously Sam, I want to know my daughter and I want her back. She was taken from me without my consent and I have missed out on four years of her life. Did you know that Madison went into distress while I was having her and I almost lost her? And then to top it off, there were complications and I was told by the doctors that I can't have any more children. So I ask you again Sam, how do you think I feel? You and my parents did this to me and I will never forgive either one of you for what you have put me through. So to answer your question Sam, yes this is what I want! I want Maddy and I will be damned if you will fucking keep her away from me again. Now let me see my child. She is not and never will be Emily's!"

My God I think my dick just twitched! That was hot and forceful Bella was sexy as hell. But I was quite proud of how Bella handles herself and as she went further into her speech to Sam, she inched further towards him and started to let some of her frustrations out but she still remained relatively calm. Although you can see it in her eyes that she is still extremely fucking angry.

I rested my hand on her arm to let her know that I support her. She slowly turned around to meet my gaze and I could feel the tension she had built up within her body, relax. I gave her my trademark half smile and she smirked back. Although it didn't reach the rest of her face, she was visibly relaxed and that was all I was after at the moment.

"Fine, I will get Emily to bring Maddy in so you can talk to her. Please don't tell her about the forged documents, I would like to tell her that but can I sit with you and explain to her that you didn't really abandon her. I would like to make it up to you if I can." Sam was indeed remorseful but something tells me that there will be a fight for custody even if it is joint.

Emily rounded the corner after receiving a call from Sam to bring Maddy in. She didn't look happy at all. Emily must really think that she is Maddy's mother in every sense of the word. Sam took Maddy's hand and gave Emily a kiss on the cheek. He whispered something in her ear because I could see the slight nod she made.

Sam brought Maddy over to meet Bella officially and then they walked over to some nearby benches to talk. I couldn't hear what was being said but I could see the glare that Emily was giving both Bella and me.

It just so happened that after about five minutes of uncomfortable silence, Alice and Jasper came down the hallway towards me. ""Hey Edward, Jake is nearly ready to go and we came to find you because I know that Bella wanted to leave with the patient transport ambulance. How's things going here?" Jasper was concerned about Bella as was I because he knew the whole story as well. Alice stayed by Jasper's side which I found strange because she and Emily are friends. Looking over at Alice, I noticed that she was looking at Bella with such concern on her face and I could see exactly how much she loved Bella. They were truly sisters in all sense of the word, even if they weren't biological.

**Bella**

I can't believe that Sam would do this to me again. He made out to Maddy that I abandoned her at birth, that I didn't want her and that Emily was her mother in all sense of the word. Like hell he is going to get away with that. Not again. When I saw him coming down the hallway without Maddy, my heart fell. I was on the verge of bursting into tears and I looked at Edward and he was looking at me to see what my reaction would be and I think he felt my pain a little.

Edward was the perfect gentleman and attorney. He spoke on behalf of me and with each of Sam's answers I was getting more and more frustrated. I think he could see the anger building up inside of me and he guided the conversation to better help me and to let Sam know that I'm not the young naive child he knocked up so that he and his wife could take my child... no way in hell was that going to happen again. Fuck him. Who the fuck does he think he is?

I couldn't concentrate on the conversation that was going on in front of me... I was too busy listening to my internal monologue and getting more irate the longer it took for him to bring me my child. I could hear the drone of both their voices and then I saw Edward look at me. My God, I am supposed to say something here. Then Sam looked me in the eyes and asked me what I really wanted. I knew that if I had spoken to him with as much anger as I had been feeling then we would get nowhere and fast. So I spoke to him as calmly as I could. I told him all about what happened when I got pregnant and when I delivered Maddy. Towards the end of my rant I told him that Emily will not be Maddy's mother. I want to fight for my daughter. The last four years have been stolen from me. I wanted to keep her but you couldn't have the daughter of the chief of police, unmarried with a child at such a young age.

Had I had Maddy a few months later I would have been eighteen and I would have been legally an adult and able to make my own decisions. But if that happened I wouldn't be working for a good hospital, probably wouldn't have been a doctor/obgyn and I wouldn't have met Edward and jasper. Oh and I can't forget Carlisle. He has been a godsend. It is like he is already on my side and he had known me for a total of a week. Looks like the Cullen family are really nice people. Even Rose, Edward's sister is nice. But knowing Edward has given me the knowledge that not only am I still attractive to the opposite sex but I made him feel good in bed. Sure we haven't had sex and last night was a one time only thing but one can only hope.

Sam had agreed to let me see Maddy and called Emily to bring her to us. Once I saw Maddy, my heart had stopped beating for a second. She was gorgeous. Sam and I went to a nearby bench to talk to Maddy. The conversation we were about to have was important and she needed to be sitting down before we could go any further.

Once we were seated, I looked at Sam and slightly nodded to let him know that he can start the conversation off. I grabbed Maddy's hand which she willingly took and she smiled at me which I reciprocated. Sam started to talk to her in a soothing manner. "Hey baby girl, you remember Bella from Uncle Jake's room don't you?" She smiled up at him and nodded whilst turning to look at me. I gave her hand a little squeeze and smiled down at her. Sam continued "Do you remember when mummy and I told you that mummy couldn't have babies and we told you that your real mummy... gave you to us to keep because she wanted mummy to be happy?" Again Maddy nodded.

"Well Bella is your real mummy. Grandpa Charlie and Grandma Renee are her mummy and daddy and they told Bella that she wasn't allowed to keep you. So they gave you to us. But baby, Bella wanted to keep you so much and she wanted to look after you too. Do you understand what I am saying to you darling?" Sam kept his voice soothing so that Maddy wouldn't get too upset with the news. Tears started to stream down my face as Maddy looked into my face to see if what Sam was saying was true. I could see that he was a good dad by the way he was with her explaining about our situation.

"Bella, is it true what daddy is saying? Did you really want to keep me? What about daddy?" The questions kept going and I knew that there would be a lot of them and I was prepared to answer any and all of her questions.

"Madison darling, please slow down. I will answer all your questions and I know that you will have lots to ask us. Please be patient with us okay?" She nodded in acceptance of what I had just told her. "Okay, so yes what your daddy is saying is true. I love you so much and have kept you near my heart for so long and I did want to keep you. I have always loved you even when I found out that I was going to be a mother. But grandpa Charlie and grandma Renee didn't want m to keep you. They told me I was too young to have a baby." I took my hand from hers and reached into my top. I pulled out a locket that I had worn every day since I had Maddy. I opened it up ad showed her a baby photo of herself. "This photo was taken by the nurse that delivered you so that I could keep a photo of you with me. No one knew that she had taken it and I was very happy that she did. When I got home from the hospital, I went shopping and brought myself this chain and locket and I put your photo in it. I have only taken tis off when I have a shower but otherwise I am always wearing it and it is always near my heart." I paused to wipe the tears off my face as I watched her take in all that I was saying and returned the locket to where it has always been sitting, under my shirt and near my heart.

The next bit was going to be hard to explain but I had to try. So far she looked as though she trusts that what I am saying is true and I hope she will understand the next bit. I held her hand once more and took a deep breath before looking at her and starting again. "Maddy... at the time when daddy and I were together I did love him very much." I glanced up at Sam to see his reaction to what I was saying. He looked down at his hands as I could see he remembered how he treated me but I wasn't going to subject my daughter to the bitterness I felt towards him. Looking back at Maddy I continued, "But because Grandpa and Grandma didn't want anyone to know I was having a baby, they took me far away to have you in secret. Daddy found someone else to love because I guess he was so lonely and that was Emily. I didn't know what Grandpa had promised daddy until they took you away from me. But you know what? Daddy and I probably wouldn't be together now even if I was still here when I had you. We both love you very much and we want what's best for you always." Maddy seemed as though she understood most of what I was saying to her but if she had questions, Sam will have to answer then for her.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Alice and Jasper come up beside Edward and tell him something. I knew they would come and fid us when it was time for us to leave.

"Maddy darling, do you know that Jake is going to another hospital to help him get better?" I asked simply.

"Yes"

"Well I work in the hospital that he is going to and I have to go now to make sure that he gets there safe. Is it ok if I give you my phone number and you can call me anytime?" What I really wanted was to take her with me. She nodded shyly and I gave my number to Sam.

"Are you going to be Uncle Jake's dottor?"

"No hunny, I help babies come into the world and keep them safe in their mummy's tummies. But I want to be close to Jake in case he needs something more. Will you think about coming to stay with me for a little bit sometime soon?" I asked hopefully. She was deep in thought for a minute buy she agreed to think about it and let me know. I was grateful for at least that.

I gave Maddy a hug and made sure I squeezed her tight and whispered that I love her in her ears. I tried to show her the love I had for the last four years that I missed. What surprised me the most was that she hugged me back with all her strength. That set another round of tears off. Maddy pulled back first and put her hands on both my cheeks to make sure that I looked at her. "I have wanted to see you for a long time mummy. Why did it take so long for you to come find me?" She asked me so innocently.

"Baby, I didn't know that you were with your daddy. Grandma and Grandpa didn't tell me anything... I thought you were living with other people. I didn't know daddy was looking after you. When I came to see Uncle Jacob at the hospital and I saw you, I knew you were my baby straight away. I went to see grandma and grandpa and they told me why they didn't want me to know. But baby, I want to know you. I missed out on watching you grow up into this beautiful little girl that I see before me. I know that Daddy and Emily looked after you really well, but I would like to look after you too. Maybe daddy and I can share you but I live in the city and I thought that maybe you could come to visit me and we can see how you like it and go from there. Does that sound like a plan? Because baby, now that I found you I don't want to let you go!" she gave me another big hug and we said our goodbyes for now.

I gave Sam my cell phone number as well as my home number and reminded him that if Maddy wanted to call, she can. Anytime! I wasn't going to miss her calls ever. I just needed to explain this to Carlisle and see if he will allow me to take calls from her during work hours.

I made my way to where Alice, Jasper and Edward were standing and thanked them for giving me some privacy. I let them know what happened later.

"Let's go and make sure that Jake is fine and we can head off" Edward exclaimed bringing me out of my inner thoughts.

"I think that is a good plan, Mr Cullen." Edward looked at me in bewilderment, like I had grown two heads or something.

"What? Have I got something on my face? What's the look for?" I was looking in my purse for a mirror to check my face. You never know nowadays.

"Umm, where did the Mr Cullen come from? You took me by surprise!" I could see the laughter in his eyes and that sexy smile on his face. I could kiss him right now but that wouldn't go down well with Sam watching us and he is my lawyer... it could be perceived as a conflict of interest.

We started making our way towards the ambulance that Jake should be in and I saw the nurse on duty and I showed her my id and told her that Dr Carlisle Cullen should have contacted then and let them know that I would be in charge of Jacob Black's transfer. She gave me his file and a run down of all his treatments and medications so far. Once everything was organised, I checked on Jake in the ambulance as they were ready to go.

Apparently Edward had organised the travel details because Jasper was driving Edward's car with Alice and Edward was driving my car with me. I was a little upset that he just took my car keys out of my hand and got in the car but I was a little emotional at the moment so I let it go.

On the drive back to Seattle, I told Edward everything that happened when Sam and I spoke to Maddy and he nodded his head. He agreed to give me a few days to think about what I want to do as the next step and starting with Carlisle is the way to go. The rest of the drive was uneventful and I thanked Edward for all his support. He has been my rock these past few days and I was grateful to both him and Jasper. They hardly knew us yet they were willing to take time off and support and help me. I will always be in their debt.

We finally reached the hospital and as we parked I noticed that Tanya and Jessica were outside having a coffee, obviously on a break. "Ahh, Edward I think you should park somewhere else a bit further away because it won't look good to Tanya if she see you come out of the car with me." And I gestured to where she was standing with my head.

"Don't worry about me Bella, I can explain everything to her and she will be fine and if she isn't she will get over it. She can't tell me who I can and can't be friends with and who I can and can't represent in a case." He dismissed my concerns like he didn't really care. I trusted that he knew what he was doing.

Tanya was really observant and saw us both get out of my car. She glared at me and I knew then that she will say something to me about it soon. Just then Alice and Jasper pulled up next to us and got out. Tanya's look went from giving me a dirty look to one of surprise. Obviously she knows what Edward's car looks like.

I quickly called Carlisle and told him that Jake arrived and we will meet him inside the emergency department. We walked in together and as we passed Tanya she jumped into Edward's arms and kissed him passionately. "You're home baby! I missed you so much. Where did you go? And why are you with _her_?" I could almost hear her snarl but Edward pulled out of her arms and all he said was "later. Now is not the time for this discussion. You are still working and I need to see my dad." And with that he left her standing there with her mouth hanging open.

We saw Carlisle and I did a thorough hand over about Jake's current condition. Because he was in a body cast and couldn't move he also had some head injuries that we need to keep an eye on.

Carlisle asked that both Edward and I go to his office and he will meet us there. We passed Tanya again and just with the look she had on her face, I knew something or someone was going to go down. She couldn't possibly know what went on between Edward and I.

I looked at Edward as we walked and told him, "Edward, don't take this the wrong way but Tanya has got a problem with me. She saw us coming out of my car together and you were driving, then when she greeted you and asked you about your whereabouts and what you are doing with me, you dismissed her and now she sees us walking together and she is still giving me dirty looks. I'm sorry to tell you this but I have to work with her and now I feel like I am going to have a hard time dealing with all her crap when I need the nurses to help me. She can make my life difficult and I have only started here. She hasn't been very welcoming in the first place."

Edward pondered what I was saying and as we entered Carlisle's office, we saw him looking out his window thoughtfully.

"Dad you okay?" Edward asked simply.

"Son, we have a problem?"

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**I am hoping that the next chapter won't be so long in coming. I am also starting a new story with my beta Eddzie... w want to write a few chapters before wse post it.**

**Thank you for reading!**


	9. Friends in arms

** A/N: Sorry peoples. I am swamped with work, kids and Real Life. Coming back from overseas and trying to sort everything out in my house is hard and i just can't seem to find a lot of time to write. I am also feeling a little unmotivated as i have had little reviews and am unsure if i should continue with ths story. **

**Enough of the Emo shit... on with the story...**

**Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns the characters, i own the story.**

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"_Son, we have a problem!"_

I was dumbfounded, not knowing what to say in regards to his statement. Carlisle didn't even say hello. Talk about not beating around the bush… what could possibly be up if there wasn't even a greeting.

"I think I might just go to my office and when you are ready let me know and I will be back. This may be something that is just between both of you." I heard Bella state calmly. I didn't want her to leave. I didn't care what had to be said and what the problem was, I just felt like I needed her to be with me. But I shouldn't be feeling this way. I should be wanting Tanya with me.

I thought I could have done some soul searching while I was away but I didn't get a chance. Everything happened at once and I was kind of swept up in the moment trying to help Bella deal with her issues. What we shared that one night will always be on my mind and in my heart. She gave so much of herself to me that it was like a bond we now share. I can feel something between us but I am still not sure what that means. I mean I like Bella, like really like her but how do I process my feelings?

Before I could tell Bella to wait and that she can stay she left my dad's office. Fuck, how can I do this alone? But then again, I don't know what the problem is. Better to act like an adult and suck it up and wait for my dad to explain.

"Well hello son, hope you had a good trip son. What's up dad? Why so serious?" I was trying to lighten the mood a little but I could tell it is still a little tense.

"Well, since Bella went back to Forks, I have had nothing but complaints from Tanya stating that Bella left all her patients for her to deal with without a hand over. Then she finds out that you were going away for a week and I think she has put two and two together and thinks that you and Bella are sneaking around behind her back. I have tried to deflect her and told her that you are helping Bella with something important. I also may have mentioned that you may be her attorney. I hope that is okay with you? I had to get her to settle down and that was my best line of defence for you.

Not only that, but she has started to tell people around the hospital that you both have set a date for the wedding and it is in a couple of months and that she has started to prepare for your wedding. She didn't tell me specifically but you know how the rumour mill goes. Nothing runs faster than good gossip. So just be careful." Dad has just thrown me through a loop and I was left looking at him with my mouth hanging open and closing like I was wanting to say something but the words wouldn't come out.. I must have looked like a fish gasping for air. Well I certainly felt like it because I couldn't seem to get my head around what he had just said. I ran my hand through my bronze locks in frustration. What the fuck?

"Ahh… what makes her think that Bella and I are sneaking around behind her back? I mean it's fine that you told her that I am Bella's lawyer and everything. No… hang on... wait a minute… When am I supposed to be getting married? This is the first I have heard about it. Aren't I supposed it have a say in when we are getting married? What has she been doing these last few days? I think I need to have a word with Tanya. This is not good."

"Son, let me ask you this... while you were in Forks the last few days, did you have a chance to do some soul searching and really think about what you want?" Dad floored me with this question because if I was really honest with both him and myself, the answer would be a big fat 'No'. No I didn't think about my feelings and 'No' I didn't do the soul searching I wanted to do. But I did find friendship and a kind of kinship between Bella and I. Being with her for the last few days have made me feel things that I thought never existed. Waking up with her in my arms each morning felt right.

I really need to speak to Tanya. What she is doing is unfathomable. She can't make me marry her unless I am good and ready to. I still want time to get used to the idea of spending forever with her. And that is something that I am not completely sure about, especially after meeting and spending time with Bella.

"I didn't get a chance to think about anything other than what Bella was going through and trying to help her. She really wants to talk to you about what is going on so that you know what is happening and what she wants to happen. I am an integral part of that and we will have to spend copious amounts of time together. She will be wanting to start legal proceedings soon, and she is worried about not only Jake but what you would think about her once she tells you the full story. She told you the short version but there is a lot more to tell and that would require you to have an open mind and not judge.

"But what I want to do is not get married in a couple of months because I want to get used to the fact that I will be spending the rest of my life with Tanya. I know how you and everyone else feel about her but I have to know what I want because this is my life we are talking about. I just need to figure out how to tell Tanya and soon." I ran my hand through my hair as I went through my rant. I was getting stressed and suddenly felt like the walls were closing in around me and I needed air… Oh God I needed air! I started hyperventilating and Carlisle came around his desk telling me to put my head between my legs and try to take deep breaths. I could hear his voice but I couldn't hear the words. It was like I was in a tunnel and everything sounded muffled.

After I recovered from my little episode I felt drained and I needed a stiff drink. But Bella wanted me to be with her while she told my dad everything. I somehow needed to gather the strength to be her rock. She needed me to be there for her and as it was I don't know if I had the energy to hear everything again and not have another anxiety attack. It was hard enough to hear the first time.

"You don't by any chance have any scotch in any of your drawers do you? I really need a stiff drink. Especially if I have to sit here and listen to what Bella has to say." Dad looked shocked and I don't think he realised just how in depth her hurt was and her case is. "I am bound by confidentiality because she is my client technically but dad she went through a lot. After everything is settled I could see us being really good friends. Hopefully, she can become a part of our family. I know she isn't related by marriage but I think you and mum would want to see her as one of your children.

Before we call Bella I just want to go outside and get some air. When I come back up, I will pass by her office and get her. Is that ok?" I was running my hand through my hair tugging at it. I had to do something with my hands because I was shaking from the anger Tanya had invoked in me. How dare she?

"That's fine son… take your time. I will be here doing some paperwork. Just let yourselves in and we can see what Bella has to say and if it is as bad as you say then I am sure that your mum and I will be there to support her in whatever way we can. You know that son.

But I am more worried about you! I have never seen you react the way you did and I am hoping that when you speak to Tanya you can keep your cool and let her explain her side of the story. She hasn't told me directly what she is planning but she has told her friends here and you know how the rumour mill goes. Sometimes it can get blown out of proportion but I wanted to give you the heads up.

Go get some air, take your time and get Bella on your way up. But you may encounter Tanya on your way to her office, just be careful and don't get into anything heated here. Remember this is a hospital and we have patients to tend to. Also they are on the maternity ward so the pregnant ladies need a calm environment. Remember you are…" he trailed off and looked deep in thought.

"What is it dad? Remember what?" Carlisle took a deep breath and walked back around his desk. "Never mind. I shouldn't have started. As you said you know how we feel about her so you can guess what I was thinking. But please… keep calm and have an adult discussion with her." He looked a little embarrassed and dropped his eyes. His shoulders slumped a little as well.

"I'll see you soon, dad. Don't worry about me. I will keep calm and if I see her while I'm walking around I will make sure to let her know that any discussions about our private life is going to be done at home. I promise you that." I ran my hand through my hair and got up to leave. I gave my dad the Cullen crooked grin and left his office.

I made my way down to the ground floor and out of the hospital building. Taking deep breaths to try to calm myself so I can be strong for Bella and be the friend she needs me to be.

What I can't understand though is the way Tanya is acting. It is like something's up for her to have a quickie wedding. You would think she is pregnant with the way she is acting. _WAIT! WHAT? She can't be, can she?_ _I have made sure that I was always so careful... I always use a condom and I make sure that she is taking her pill every day. I'm not ready to be a father and I am really not certain that I want Tanya to be the mother of my children when I have them._

I started pacing the front of the hospital as I was trying to calm down and get my thoughts into some sort of order so that I can be able to focus on the next meeting with Bella and my dad. I stop pacing and run my hand through my hair when I felt someone lay their hand on my forearm. I jumped slightly at their touch until I realised that there was the spark again. I immediately calm down and lower my arm. She is still touching me with so much gentleness that I can't fathom. Why does she have this kind of effect on me? It's bad enough that I can't stop thinking about her.

"Are you okay?" She tentatively asks. She is holding my gaze so that she can make sure that I'm not going insane.

"Yeah just got some disturbing news and I needed air. How did you know I was out here?" I ask as I glance down at her hand on my arm. Sparks are penetrating my arm and it feels warm and tingly.

"Your dad!" Bella simply replies. "I rang him to tell him that I was going to check on Jake and to page me instead of calling and he said that you were out here. You don't need to tell me what is going on but I would like to be here for you as a friend in any capacity that you want me to be." She moves her hand upwards and stops on my shoulder. Looking at her eyes I can see that she is sincere in what she says. She has no hidden motives and I want so much to just wrap her up in my arms. But I know I can't so I keep my hands by my side and clench and unclench my fists. I am so highly strung at the moment because of Tanya that I just want to tell Bella everything. I want to take her up on her offer to be the friend that I need and want at this time but I can't. Maybe once her case is over with I can have that with her.

"Bella, as much as I want you to be there for me and be the friend that I need at the moment, I can't let you do that. I am your lawyer and I can't let Sam's lawyer think that there is more to our relationship than attorney / client. Once all this has been sorted out I would want nothing less than your friendship. There are just some things that I need to sort out first. I need to sort out my feelings towards my fiancé and get my head around a few things." Bella silenced my rant by shushing me with her finger against my lips and I am kind of glad that she did because I was getting a bit out of control.

"Hey, hey. Stop! You are rambling and most of it I don't understand but I will tell you this. I can have a friend as my lawyer. You have been with me through everything that has happened in Forks. I want to be there for you now. Lean on me if you need to..."

".GOD. SERIOUSLY EDWARD, I WOULDN'T THINK YOU WOULD BLATENTLY CHEAT ON ME AT MY PLACE OF WORK AND WITH HER OF ALL PEOPLE."

Bella dropped her hand and looked over at Tanya. I was already livid with her and that just pushed me over the edge. "Tanya, you will keep your voice down and I am not cheating on you. Bella is a friend that so happens to know that right now I need a friend to talk to after what I just heard from my dad. Now this isn't the time nor the place to have the conversation I want to have with you about what I have heard and what you have been doing behind my back and without my knowledge. So don't you dare start shouting at me! Are you trying to get some sort of attention that will make you look good? Because it won't work! I will not allow you to bad mouth Bella because of some insecurity you may or may not have. Do you understand me? Everything else we will talk about when we get home tonight." With that I grabbed Bella's hand and dragged her inside to my father's office.

"Edward, what is going on? I know I told you that you didn't have to tell me anything but after that outburst from Tanya and the fact that I have to work with her, can you at least tell me something... anything?" Bella was pleading as we made our way to the lifts. Pressing the button and stepping inside the lift, blowing a sigh of relief that we are alone, which is kind of rare in a hospital.

"Listen Bella, she thinks that because I left town and that we show up together this morning that we are having an affair. I still haven't spoken to her about the reason I left town and I won't say anything unless you tell me I can. But then what I can tell her is minimal because of client confidentiality privilege. She has also started planning our wedding and set the date all in the past couple of days. Apparently I am supposed to get married in a couple of months or less. I'm not sure when and neither is my family. Dad doesn't know much either. But she is bad mouthing you to everyone." I chanced a look towards Bella and saw that she was gaping at me in shock. I basically told her a shortened version of what my father had told me earlier.

"Oh. My. God! Can this day get any worse? Seriously? What the fuck? Sorry but this was not what I expected. At all. What is wrong with that bitch? How dare she? You know what... this isn't worth it. I honestly can't deal with all this shit. With Sam and Maddy, Jake and now this. I can't work with her anymore... I won't work with her anymore and I think I am going to go in this meeting and let Carlisle know that I quit. I'm done. I can't take her crap on top of everything else." Bella honestly looked like she could rip someone a new one. Furious Bella is a sexy Bella. My jaw literally dropped to the floor. I didn't know just how much she was dealing with and how badly she was coping. She seemed well put together and in control. I guess I got it wrong big time. Maybe I shouldn't have said anything.

"Bella maybe I shouldn't have said anything. You just can't up and quit your job over Tanya. Let me deal with her please..." I grabbed onto her hands so that she could look me in the eyes and know that I am going to help her through it all. Bella's gaze went from our joined hands slowly to my eyes. Searching my eyes to see if I was just saying this or if I was serious. "Please Bella, Please? Let me take care of Tanya. She is my problem not yours!"

"You can't promise me that Edward, I will still have to deal with her at work and if she has already spread rumours, there is a huge guarantee that everyone will believe it because of her outburst just now." She started shaking and her eyes became glassy with unshed tears.

The lift doors opened on my dad's floor and we stepped out. I still held her hands as we walked into my dad's office together.

Carlisle looked up when we entered his office and he took one look at our joined hands and a small smile graced his face. It was like he approved of the idea of us. But I may be reading too much into this.

"Carlisle I would like to render my resignation. Effective immediately." The look of shock on his face was something to put in the memory bank and it was my turn to smile as no one has left my dad speechless ever. Not even when I announced my engagement to Tanya.

"Ummm, What? I'm sorry Bella but that was the last thing that I thought you would ever say. Care to tell me what is going on? Either of you because if my memory serves me correctly you were just going to come in here and tell me what happened in Forks not to resign. What happened in the last couple of hours?" shock was still etched on dad's face. I tried to keep a straight face but it was getting extremely hard.

"A lot has happened and I have had time to think things through and frankly I can't handle working with someone that has little regard for what may or may not be going on in someone's life and then go and assume something that has never happened and then start spreading rumours by yelling at the top of their lungs about things. All because of a friendly gesture or touch. URGH! I am just so pissed, and I realise that my decision may be rash and based on my running emotions at the moment but I am done! I refuse to let Sam and Emily, Renee and Charlie and now this person decide what happens in my life. Apparently I am having an affair with your son at my place of work." And Bella took a deep breath and I took a quick glance at Carlisle and he had the same stunned look on his face. I decided to take matters in my own hands. Literally!

I grabbed Bella's hand and squeezed. I gave her my best crooked smile and she caught my eye and I could see her relax.

"Bella, whoever said that is obviously not thinking straight and is a little jealous of you. I can only imagine who that particular person is. Honestly Bella, you are not thinking straight and I won't accept your resignation until you have thought long and hard and know that this is truly what you want. Now can you tell me about what happened in Forks? I know that you wanted Edward here with you for morale support and that he knows the whole story. But if you want him to leave at any time or you feel that you don't want to tell me the whole story then that is fine. Take all the time you need." Carlisle was surprisingly calm for the way Bella was ranting before.

Bella started telling her story about how she was coerced into having sex with Sam when she was only 17 and when she wanted him to stop he didn't. She was practically raped and got pregnant all because Sam's fiancé couldn't have kids and he thought Bella would be the perfect candidate for a surrogate mother but he didn't think to inform her of his decision or let her make up her own mind. He took advantage of a very trusting young girl who was head over heels in love with him and Bella was under the impression that he loved her in return.

She spoke about how her parents thought that she was a slut and a cock tease and got herself into trouble because she wanted to have sex with Sam but according to Sam she didn't tell him to stop and was making it all up to make Sam look like the bad guy. Charlie being the chief of police believed Sam over his own daughter and was disgusted and ashamed of her and sent her away to Arizona with her mum to have the baby and that baby was going to be given up for adoption. No questions asked.

Bella went on to tell about how her dad and Sam forged adoption documents for the baby so that Sam and by then his new wife Emily could take the baby and look after it as if it were their own. They told everyone that Emily was pregnant and she faked her nine months perfectly. Once Bella had the baby, Charlie didn't even let her say goodbye to her. She told her mum that she wanted her named Maddison and there was no way she would be named anything else. That was her wish. Bella had turned eighteen by the time she had Maddy she was legally an adult and the forged adoption papers were null and void. But Bella didn't know about this until now.

Bella continued to tell her story about the altercation between her parents and between Sam and her on the last day and making sure that Maddy knew that she was her mum before she came back with Jacob. Bella sniffled and wiped tears that were streaming down her face. She looked up at my dad and even I noticed that he had a few tears that seemed to have escaped from under his lids. She took one last deep breath to continue...

"So basically that is my sordid story and I understand if you don't want that kind of drama in your hospital. But I will not be belittled by staff that I have to work with and I would rather quit than have rumours spread about me and also I don't want the reputations of both you and Edward to come into disarray because of me..."

Dad interrupted Bella with a determined look on his face, "I would rather fire her than lose you. You have a phenomenal work ethic and Rose is ecstatic that you are her doctor. She would rather not have to deal with Tanya anymore and has constantly complained about her to me at all her other appointments." Dad faced me with a smug grin. "Sorry son, well you know I'm not really because you know how we feel about your fiancé but we all told you we would support you regardless. Doesn't mean we have to like her. So long as she makes you happy son, that's all that matters."

It was Bella's turn to look shocked... "Yeah thanks dad, good to know that you are showing the love." And with that we all burst into fits of laughter. God it felt good to fucking laugh again. There has been too much pain and anguish these past few days.

"Bella we would love for you to come to our house for Sunday brunch so that you can meet the whole family. We aren't as scary as you think. Ask Alice to come along... it would be good to meet someone so upbeat and lively that was able to tame Jasper down." Looking over at Bella first to our still joined hands and then slowly up to her face noticing that she is deep in thought, because she is biting her bottom lip. Dad opened his mouth to make one final plea, but I beat him to the chase... "Please Bella, honestly you wouldn't be imposing and you don't have any contact with your family anymore, let us be your family. And I know that where you go, Alice goes and vice versa because you two are like two peas in a pod. You are inseparable."

Her shoulder slumped in defeat as she looked me in the eyes searching for something that would make her turn down our pleas. She obviously found something because a hint of recognition came about in her features. "What about Tanya? Won't she be there? I don't want to start trouble and I would rather not see her outside of work if I can help it." She started worrying her lip again.

I reached out and pulled her lip out from her teeth and sincerely said... "You won't be starting trouble... the trouble has already started without you." Bella looked confused at my comment until Carlisle cleared his voice to break up the electric energy that had accumulated in the air around us.

"Bella what my dear son means to tell you is that she has already stirred the pot before she knew that you both were in Forks together these past few days. Besides, family gatherings aren't really her thing! She prefers to shop and go to spas and spend all Edward's hard earned money because she thinks she can. Doesn't she son? Hopefully you still have some in your account after what she has been doing while you have been away. But I will leave that up to you. I just wanted to bring everything to your attention." Bella looked a little uncomfortable listening to a little of our conversation earlier.

"Okay... so where do you go from here? What are your intentions in regards to Maddy? And work? Bella, I want you to bear in mind that if you resign now and then go for custody of Maddy, it won't look good in the eyes of the courts. I'm sure Edward can verify that." Bella looked towards me as I nodded in affirmation and she looked defeated like she was stuck between a rock and a hard place. "Maybe when you come over on Sunday Esme can share a little about what it is like to lose a child to adoption and never being able to find them again. You have a wonderful opportunity to get to know your daughter and have the perfect role of being her mother and be a constant person in her life. It has only been four years for you... it has been a lot longer for us. It is going on 25 years and to tell you the truth we don't have a hope in hell in finding our child unless they come looking for us." Dad seemed a little sad thinking about our lost sibling. We were always told from the very beginning that because of circumstances beyond our parent's control, they had to give up one of their children. They hadn't stopped loving her and they have always held hope that she would come looking for us. As it stands we will always live in hope that she wants to know us and providing that her adoptive parents told her that she was adopted.

Bella looked my dad squarely in the eyes and with determination she said "I want Maddy. I want to be her mother in every way. I missed out of four years on her life already and I don't want to miss out on anything else. I love my daughter with all my heart and never stopped. It was a huge shock to see that my father forged documents to relinquish my parental rights. And I don't want to really quit my job. It was a heat of the moment thing but I would like to request that I not work with Tanya at all. I don't want her on my team at all. Even if she is the last person here and I need someone, I want to be able to call someone in rather than use her. I love my job and I want to be there for Rose because I have found a friend in her. She is a wonderful person and I don't want to disrupt her again with her care."

After taking another deep breath she continued… "I'm sure I can speak for Alice… we would love to come to your house for brunch. You will love Alice… she is like a breath of fresh air.

Just one more thing, Carlisle, is it possible to start back at work tomorrow? I know that I am supposed to have to rest of the week off but if I am going to be here anyway seeing Jake I can at least break up the monotony of the day by working and Rose is due to come in at the end of this week anyway." Carlisle held up his hand to make Bella stop her rant. My God she is gorgeous and has a beautiful disposition. She is genuinely kind hearted and it makes me wonder what I saw in Tanya after all. More thinking to do I guess, but I need to talk to Tanya tonight first. All I know is that I won't be getting married in a couple of months.

"Bella, it's fine for you to start back tomorrow. I completely understand. And I'm sure Rose would love to know that you will be here for her instead of Tanya. You my dear have made a lasting impression on my daughter. She already loves you and can't stop talking about you."

A smile graced Bella's lips which travelled up to her eyes. She is truly remarkable. I need to keep my thoughts in check and I can't keep thinking about Bella like this because people will get the wrong impression about us. Yes, she is one attractive woman and she is fuck hot but there cannot be anything between us.

"Carlisle, can I please talk to you in private? Sorry Edward, but I just need to talk to your dad for a few minutes." She looked at me remorsefully but I quickly squashed that.

"That's fine Bella. I'm going to head home seeing as it is getting late but I will quickly check on Jake before I go. Let me know if you need anything. Bye dad, bye Bella, see you on Sunday if not before." I got up and waved them bye.

As I was making my way back downstairs to go home, I thought I would stop by the maternity ward to see if Tanya was nearing the end of her shift so that maybe we could go home together. I got off the elevator and heard hushed voices in the corridor. There was a lot of giggling going on and as I walked around the corner, I noticed that there was a door open slightly in one of the rooms and heard some moaning and giggling again.

I let curiosity get the better of me and was wondering what was going on at the hospital behind my father's back. I know the speech he tells all his new employees and he makes sure that they know what he expects as well. If there is something going on that is not up to his expectations then that staff member can kiss their job good bye.

I peered into the room and what I saw I was not expecting in a million years. Tanya had her arms around some guy and he had his head nuzzled into her neck. She looked dazed and turned on. Oh my fucking god. I cannot believe that she would do that to me. Especially after she accused me of doing this exact same thing with Bella! Lying... fucking... bitch. I stepped away and took a few deep breaths to calm down. Two can play at this game, whore! I was pissed. No I was beyond pissed, I was fuming… frustrated… totally and utterly angry. She will pay for this and it won't be pretty. I don't know if I can get passed this.

I went to the nurses' station to let continue as if I hadn't actually stumbled on to my supposed fiancé practically dry humping some guy. As I walked up to the desk, Jane's head popped up and looked at me in surprise. Her eyes darted away down the hallway I just came from and pretty much looked scared. "Hey Jane, how are you?" I smiled but it was strained and I'm sure looked too much like a grimace.

"Edward! My gosh! I didn't expect to see you here today. Tanya mentioned that you went away for a while. When did you get back?" I found it strange that she pretty much yelled my name. Is that code for Tanya to be careful?

"I came back today actually and I have been talking with my father all this time. I was just about to head home and thought I would see if Tanya is ready to come home as well." I tried to sound convincing but not sure if I pulled it off. I did keep the smile plastered on my face though. Jane just kept glancing down the corridor.

"Hope everything is ok. Tanya is with a patient and to be honest I'm not sure how long she will be. They just went into the exam room a few minutes ago." She looked up and smiled genuinely. There was a hint of remorse crossing her eyes which I found confusing. Why would she feel remorseful? Did she know what was going on here and not think to tell anyone? Tanya is the one fucking around.

"That's fine… can you please let her know that I came past and I would see her at home? I have a few errands to run but I will pick up dinner when I'm on my way home." Jane nodded and as I turned to leave I could hear a sigh of relief from Jane but thought nothing of it. I waved and said bye to her and continued down the same corridor I came from. I think I was hoping to see a glance of what they were up to now. As I past the room I noticed that the door was closed completely and that the sounds weren't as loud this time.

I made a split decision to change the way things were with us, starting with my bank accounts. The things about Tanya going on a spending spree over the last few days have been playing on my mind. I need to see what is going on.

At the bank, I spoke to a lovely lady whose name is Gianna. I gave her my account details and produced my licence to confirm my identity and asked her for a statement on my account. Once she passed it to me I had a quick glance of my statement and I couldn't believe the amount that she has withdrawn. I know I gave her permission to use my account for bills but this is fucking ridiculous. My temper ignited again and it took all the strength I could muster to reign it in and not take it out on this poor girl.

"Uh, Gianna, can I possibly speak to someone about my accounts. I would rather speak privately to someone and not here where everyone can hear." Gianna nodded and quickly called someone on the phone. I would need the privacy of an office so if I flipped my lid I don't have to do it publically. I have a reputation to uphold and I think I may get a little loud judging by what's on my statement.

"Follow me please Mr Cullen, Lauren is available to see you." Gianna gave me a slight smile and led me down to the offices where Lauren was standing at the door ready to greet me.

"Thank you Gianna. Good afternoon Mr Cullen, my name is Lauren. Please come in and take a seat." I walked past her as she closed the door behind us. She made her way behind her desk and when she sat down she picked up a pen and got a new sheet of paper out ready to take notes. I already like Lauren. She is willing to listen to me, to find out what my problem is and to help find a solution to said problems.

"Thanks you for seeing me Lauren. I have a few issues with my accounts that I am hoping you can help me sort out. In doing so I will have to give you a bit of a background into these issues but I am hoping that you will keep everything confidential." She nodded in confirmation and I continued.

"I am not sure if you are aware but I am a high profile lawyer and I am worth a lot of money and at the moment I have had a look at my statements and realised that a lot of money has been taken from my account. My fiancé is on my account as a signatory and she has a card that she can use for expenses. Unfortunately the withdrawals that have been coming out of my account for the past few days aren't expenses.

What I want to do is possibly open a new account and deposit the bulk of my funds into that one. I want to keep this account open for the time being but have minimal funds in there. Like a couple of grand. I kind of want to teach her a lesson. Also I would like to get the statements for this account for the last seven years, from when we started seeing each other because I want to know what has been going on.

I know I am a signatory on her account and I was wondering if you could give me a statement on her account. I have her account details here." I pulled out my wallet and took out the card with Tanya's account details on it and handed it to Lauren. Before I could say anything else, Lauren held her hand up to silence me.

"Let me get this straight Mr Cullen, are you saying that your fiancé has been taking money out of your account without you knowing the amount she is taking?" I nodded and she continued "you authorised her to be on your account so in fact you are allowing her to do whatever she wants except close the account." I was shocked at that information. I don't think I was ever told that. Even when I added her to my account. The agreement was that she only pay for expenses and bills. That's all. I was starting to get really angry and frustrated at the whole situation. I did this to myself. I allowed her the freedom with my money. Oh this is going to be good.

"Can you tell me what is in her account then please? It would be interesting to know what her account balance is if she has just been using my money." Lauren nodded and looked up. I could see apprehension in her eyes. It is like she is afraid of my reaction to the next piece of information. It's like she could pick up on the anger vibes I was extruding. "Well… um… Mr Cullen… she has actually closed her accounts earlier today!" She quickly looked down and flinched waiting for the onset of my fury.

"SHE WHAT?" I yelled and immediately was sorry that I did that. This was not Lauren's fault. It was Tanya's. "Sorry… can you tell me how much was in the account before it was closed?" I looked at Lauren apologetically so that she knew that I wasn't angry at her. I shifted in my seat, so I was sitting closer to the edge. I don't know if sitting like that would make me hear her any better or not but I needed to be closer to the desk. "Can you print out a statement on that account for the last seven years as well please?"

Lauren printed the statement and told me that she transferred over five hundred thousand into another account but because I was not on that particular account I couldn't get information on it.

"Mr Cullen, how about we go ahead and do what you wanted… let's open another account and transfer money into it, keep the current one open for all your expenses and you can either keep Tanya on this account or take her off. But the way I will open the new one, she will not be able to access the funds in that account. Does that sound okay?" Lauren looked at me in the eyes and she had regained the professional composure. Like the information and the angry outbursts were nothing. I liked this about her.

"Work your magic Lauren. You have been a godsend. Thank you for helping me and giving me the information you already have." Once she opened the new account and transferred the majority of my money, I shook her hand and thanked her again and made my way to the car a little lighter. There was someone I needed to speak to before I went home. I needed his help in finding a solution to my impending problem. I pulled out my phone and dialled his number. Holding the phone to my ear with one hand and running my other hand through my hair letting out a deep breath. I needed to calm the fuck down or I will have a fucking heart attack before the day is over. And I still have to go home and face the heinous bitch. She better have a good fucking explanation about what has been going on.

"Good afternoon, J Jenks and Associates, this is Kate speaking, how may I direct your call?" the sweet tone was making my insides churn.

"Hi Kate, it's Edward Cullen, can I please speak to Jenks?" I tried to sound professional and not come across angry, because god knows I am fucking pissed. Every time I look down at the pieces of paper in my hands, I get angrier.

"Please hold and I will see if he is available Mr Cullen…" after waiting what seemed like hours, was probably in fact seconds, I hear Jenks voice on the phone.

"Edward, to what do I owe this honour. I don't usually hear from you. I have a very good relationship with your assistant." He was in a joking mood today.

"Jenks I'm on my way to see you… what I need you to do is something that can't wait and it can't be said on the phone. I'll be there in 10 minutes."

"Sure thing, I'll let Kate know that you are coming and to make sure she sends you straight through. This sounds important. Hopefully I can help."

"I'm counting on your help Jenks. See you soon." I hung up and started making my way to his office.

"Good afternoon Mr Cullen. Mr Jenks is waiting for you. Please go on through."

"Thanks Kate." I ran my hand through my hair as I approached Jenks' office. I knocked on the door twice and walked in closing it behind me.

"Jenks!" I nodded towards him.

"Edward my boy. Take a seat and tell me what I can do for you that is so important?" Jenks leaned in and crossed his arms on his desk. Everything else he was working on was pushed aside and I had his full attention.

I explained what I found out at the bank and handed him my statements. His job for as long as it takes is to find out how much she has transferred or withdrawn from my account. I told him that it was imperative that he give me this information as soon as possible. I made sure that he understood that this is to be completed by him and him only and no one is to look at these statements under any circumstances. I know that Tanya also see some accountants here and I don't want her to know what I'm doing. Well not yet anyway.

~x~EB~o~

I walked in the house tentatively and waited for the onslaught of world war three. I knew Tanya was pissed from lunch but I had to calm myself down before I said something that could undo my plans. I know that Tanya is home because I saw her car in the drive. I placed my keys in the bowl near the door and continued down the corridor to the kitchen.

Our house or should I say my house is nothing special. I have an open plan living area and although it isn't as big as what I would have liked but I didn't want to have Tanya live in my dream house as yet. That is something I want to give my soul mate as a wedding present.

I found Tanya sitting on the couch, watching television. Seriously, can't she do anything around here? It's bad enough that I have to pay for a cleaner because she says she can't ruin her hands with detergents. That's fine but can't she at least cook. I'm sick of takeout every night. I let out a sigh in frustration and she whipped her head around.

"Edward! I didn't hear you come in. what took you so long? I've been waiting for a while now. Where did you go since you left the hospital? I must have missed you. Jane told me you came to see me. Did you want anything in particular?" Tanya sounded nervous.

"Well after I left the hospital I had errands to run. I wanted to see if you wanted to come home with me but luckily for me you were busy. I could get everything done. How long have you been home? You could have at least started dinner. I'm getting tired of eating out every single day." I was getting frustrated with her but I need to reign it in so she doesn't suspect anything.

"Edwaaaard! We always eat out and you said you would bring home dinner. You know I can't cook…" I had to stop her rant and I unleashed a bit of fury at her.

"Tanya… you don't cook, you don't clean… what is it that you do here that helps the running of this household. Because you don't fucking pay a god damned bill or any of the mortgage, or pay for groceries. Actually do you use any of your money towards anything relating to this house? You are living here rent free, and yes we have been together for seven years but right now I what I really want to do is retract my proposal. But you have spent too much of my fucking money to pay for this wedding. And when are we supposed to be getting married? Aren't I supposed to be involved in the planning of our wedding? Don't you think I should have a say in when and where we get married? What have you booked and how much money have you spent?

And while we are discussing things… how dare you insinuate that Bella and I are having a fucking affair. She is my client and not that any of this is your business but she and I will be spending a lot of time together. You embarrassed not only me and Bella but yourself as well. Let me tell you that Bella is not at all happy at what you said. She told my father that she doesn't want to work with you at all. And you know what? I don't fucking blame her. So expect to find yourself in my dad's office tomorrow morning."

Tanya started crying and I could see that she was mortified that I could yell at her and just blurt everything out in one go.

"Baby, you know I can't cook… and cleaning isn't my forte. I need to make sure that I don't ruin my hands as they are usually in someone's vagina. You have never asked that I pay for anything. I thought if we were moving in together that you had everything under control and you even gave me a card to use the money in your account. Why would you do that if you wanted me to pay for things?"

"The thing is Tanya, is that you didn't offer. You didn't say anything about helping pay for the house. You have been living here for seven years. So how much have you been able to save in that time? I noticed a considerable amount of money missing from my account. What I know should be there and what is actually there are two very different amounts. What have you been buying?"

"I have been making this house our home. I have furnished all the rooms to give it some personality. You didn't ask for anything and I just assumed that you being the bread winner will pay for everything. I didn't know that I had to put any money into our relationship. You know how the saying goes… what's yours is mine…" "Yeah and you finish it with 'what's mine is mine' didn't you? Tanya for this relationship to work you have to give as well… it can't just be take all the time. You have to understand that I may make a considerable amount of money but that's because I fucking work hard for that money. I don't have a trust fund or anything. I slaved to get myself a good name and an even better wage. So about the wedding… tell me what's going on!"

"I have tentatively booked for the second weekend in May. A nice spring wedding. I thought that because we have been together for so long that you wouldn't want to wait to start our lives together as husband and wife. I obviously got that wrong. I can change the date if you want. I have put deposits on the church and the reception. I have also bought my dress and put deposits on the flowers."

"Oh my fucking God Tanya… I can't believe you did this without me and spent my money doing it. You are going to have to repay my account with that money and also you want the wedding that soon… you pay for it. Do you understand me? My account is not to be used for any wedding business at all. I want to see receipts from the bank to show mw that you have replaced my money. If I am paying for the bills and the mortgage than you are paying for the wedding, then once we are married I expect you to pay for half the mortgage. Are we going to agree on this? Also, I am going to have Jasper draw up a pre-nuptial agreement for you to sign before we get married. I will not be getting married without one. Do we understand each other?" I was giving Tanya an out if she wanted it but there is no way she is taking more of my money. Once she signs the pre-nup then I will get her to give me back all the money she has taken from my account throughout the years we have been together. I just hope Jenks can give me a figure soon so I know what I have to ask for.

"Are you serious Edward? Why do I have to pay for the wedding? Why can't you pay for half at least? And once we get married why do I have to pay half the mortgage? You wanted this house and it is in your name so why should I give you any money? I am so not signing a pre-nuptial agreement. I have invested too much time into our relationship to have you say that I don't get anything if we get divorced. That is so not fair. You haven't tried in our relationship. You have just gone to work and done nothing to contribute to making this work.

You go off at the drop of a hat for a few days and come back without calling me to tell me that you are heading home. Instead I hear rumours that you have come into the hospital with Bella and some other couple. Then I go outside to look for you and find you looking comfortable with Bella. What was I supposed to think? You both looked like a couple in an intimate stance, like no one existed besides the both of you. You can't tell me that she was just being a friend Edward. She has stronger feelings for you than friendship. Something happened between you both while you were away. Why did you have to run to her in the first place?" Tanya's demeanour went from defensive to inquisitive, but I wasn't going to break client confidentiality. I would cover for Bella as much as possible.

"Bella and her friend Alice went to Forks because Alice's brother was in a serious car accident. While they were there Bella called my father and told him what was going on and that some things have arisen and she would need a lawyer. She called me and Jasper and I went out to see her. We had to gather information from everyone involved and Bella is my new client. You know the specifics are confidential, all you need to know is that Bella is my client and we will be spending time together until the case is closed. Do you understand me? This subject is now closed."

"Then why did things look cosy between you both?"

"She was being a friend. I was being her friend when things came to a head in Forks and she was repaying the favour. I had to see Carlisle when I got back to Seattle. He told me some things that were making me angry and claustrophobic. I needed air and Bella was told I was outside. She came to get me so we could see Carlisle together for the next part of the conference. She laid her hand on my shoulder to comfort me and tell me that she was there as a friend if I needed it. There was nothing else involved in that whole exchange. Expect when you came flying outside and accused us of having an affair. That shit doesn't sit well with either of us.

Everything else that I have discussed with you about the pre-nup and repaying the money you used for the wedding and also paying for half the mortgage is still non-negotiable. I expect your co-operation by the end of the week. If not then I will know that you have been with me solely for my money and our so called relationship that I apparently haven't been putting any effort into was all a fake. So now the ball is in your court. I'm going to bed!" I was surprised that I was quite calm in telling her my demands. This is a test to see if Tanya really was in love with me or not. As I turned away from her to go upstairs to our bedroom, I heard sniffling and her footsteps behind me. I slowed down to see what she would do next and she weaved her arms around my waist and her head was pressed against my back.

"I'm sorry for what I said Edward. I didn't mean it. I just said that in the heat of the moment and… I'm just sorry!" I could feel her tears wet the back of my shirt but she held on for dear life. "I was just so scared that you would leave me for Bella. Seriously, I have felt like you have been pulling away from me and I don't know what I have done. Is it because of the money? I can change and I can start paying for things. Just don't ask me to pay back the money for the wedding… it's your wedding too…" I had to stop Tanya there. If she continued then I may have quite literally have wither kicked her out or walked out myself.

"Enough Tanya, if I were you I would keep my mouth shut. You want this wedding so soon, so you pay for it. I'm happy to stay engaged for at least a couple of years before we actually get married. I have been paying for everything in this house… you need to contribute towards something and if you want this lavish wedding that is so expensive and out of control then you pay for it. I would rather go to City Hall and get married, or even Vegas. It is just a piece of paper to me.

If you haven't noticed, I have been really busy with a case at work. That is taking all my time at the moment. My boss told me to take some time off and when Bella called me for help, Jasper and I went to see what we can do. I may have been taking time off work but I was working. What you need to understand and accept, Tanya is that Bella is not only a client but also a friend. She is going to be a part of my life and my family's lives as well. So if you intend on making one of the Sunday brunches that my parents have every Sunday, you will need to make sure that you treat her with respect. There is no way that I or my family will accept anything less. By the way Bella, Alice and Jasper will be there this Sunday. I told Bella that you don't usually come to these things and not to expect to see you there.

Tanya, we really need to try to communicate more. Can I ask what you have been spending my money on? I know that there is a significant amount of money missing from my account. I had to go into the bank to find out why I haven't been receiving statements. The balance of my account isn't right. I need to know what you buy? And I want to see receipts from all your purchases from now on. If you have other receipts then I want to see them too." I ran my hand through my hair getting frustrated again but trying to calm myself down. What I really want to do is strangle her.

"I have plans this Sunday that I can't get out of, so I can't make it this weekend. I will keep the following weekend free for you. Maybe we can do something together. Why don't we skip the brunch next weekend and just do something… just the two of us." I let out a breath and sighed. "What's wrong now? Why did you sigh? What could I have possibly done wrong now? I will go up and get the receipts that you wanted and show you what I have been buying. Just so you know, I need to look good being on the arm of a successful attorney." She smiled but it didn't reach her eyes and there was something there that I just couldn't place. What is with her? Did she think that by doing as I asked would all of a sudden please me? And I will let everything go. Well she has another thing coming.

"You never want to do things with my family. They have tried to make you a part of the family but you disregard them at every turn and degrade them at any chance. What have my family ever done to you besides try to welcome you?" This was going to be harder than I thought. Tanya looked upset and really distraught about what I just said. Hey I called her out on her shit and she is probably is upset that I called her out on her shit.

"Your family really don't like me and think that I have an ulterior motive. I don't do family things because it is easier on everyone. They can't stand to be in the same room as me and I know what they say behind my back. Rose even requested that she see Bella for all her appointments... what does that tell you? Huh? That maybe she isn't my greatest fan? that maybe she doesn't want me to be a part of her life? Seriously Edward, take off those rose coloured glasses and look at things my way. You don't see how they treat me…"

"Hang on one fucking minute…. Me take off rose coloured glasses? I see how they treat you and I know all about their feelings towards you. They actually tell me things so don't tell me to open my eyes. I know what you say about them behind their backs as well. You don't make time for Alice or Rose and go shopping with them. You are doing this all by yourself. They don't need to do anything. Why don't you ever cancel your plans and make time for my family. You have always known that Sunday brunch is a family tradition and one that I am not likely to give up for anyone. This is my time to catch up with my family. We are all really close and I want to be involved in their lives. I want to see Rose's baby grow in her belly and I want to see how Emmett dotes over Rose. I also want to see how Jasper's relationship with Alice is blossoming. But you just don't care. Everything has to be about you. Well not anymore Tanya, I have had just about enough. I think it would be best if you slept in the guest room tonight and hopefully I have calmed down enough tomorrow to allow you back in my bed." I slumped my shoulders and walked up the stairs to my bedroom.

I desperately needed a hot shower to calm down and as I walked into the bathroom, I started stripping leaving my clothes on the floor strewn all over the place. I turned on the shower allowing it to heat up and looked at myself in the mirror. I looked weary and older than my twenty seven years. I stepped into the shower and let the hot water wash away all the stress of the day and the revelations of everything I found out in one day. I just need to get through the next few days until I can speak to Jenks again. I finished my shower and climbed into bed sans boxers today. I needed to feel the cool crisp sheets all over my body without having Tanya splayed all over me. I may just get a good night's sleep after all.

I was having this amazing dream and it felt life like.

_I was lying on my bed asleep and was woken up by Bella kissing down my chest. She took in my nipples and I groaned sucking one then the other. She then started kissing down my chest again until she reached the promised land. I felt her flick the tip of my cock with her tongue licking off the precum that had pooled there and continued to lick my shaft from base to tip. I was so turned on that it felt as though the moment she would wrap her plump lips over my cock and take it in and start sucking, I would blow my load. I then felt her wrap her lips around my cock just taking in the head. I moaned in pleasure as my hands went to wrap her hair in my hands and hold her there. I was going to start to guide her head up and down my cock when she started to take me deeper and deeper with each bob of her head._

_I could heel myself hit the back of her throat and I felt her swallow and relax her throat so she could take more of me in. She was tantalizingly slow with her ministrations and she quickly worked me into a frenzy. I held her head still and thrust int her mouth a few times before I found my release. "Fuck bay you are so good. Suck my cock clean. You like it when I talk dirty to you, don't you?" _

_I heard her moan and swallow what I gave her and she licked me clean. She pecked the tip of my cock and moaned again saying "Yum, so good!" but the voice was all wrong. That didn't sound like Bella's voice at all and I called out "babe are you ok?" She hummed in response. _

_She crawled up my body and this time it really did feel real. Was this a dream or did it just happen? I felt her body slump on my chest but it felt all wrong from what I remember when we were in Forks. _

I opened my eyes to make sure it was all a dream and to make sure I didn't say anything too loud. I put my arm out and patted my chest first. Yep definitely someone here. I know damn well it won't be Bella because she doesn't know where I live. There is only one person that it could be and I peered down my chest to see strawberry blonde hair splayed over my chest not mahogany brown. Wait… she shouldn't be in my room tonight.

"Tanya, what are you doing in here?" I exclaimed.

She looked up at me from where she was laid and smiled, "Giving you some pleasure. I think you were just sexually frustrated and needed a release, that's why you went all ape shit on my ass last night. I know we don't have sex as often as you would like but I will make more of an effort from now on. I just can't sleep in a bed without you. Please don't make me!"

I was too tired and I did feel a bit more relaxed so I acquiesced her and let her stay in my room. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day!

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**Phew! (*wipes brow*) This is the longest chapter yet. I couldn't find a good spot to stop it so i let it continue. Next chapter we find out what happens with Bella's chat with Carlisle and we may skip to brunch with the Cullen's.**

**Let me know what you think and if i should continue with the story. It would be good to know what you think.**

**Until next time!**


	10. Sunday Brunch

_**A/N: I have been able to get my ass into gear and update this chapter quicker than i have been lately. I have lost some confidence in my story as i haven't recieved many reviews. I am reaching a point as to whether i give up the story now or continue. I know that a lot of people read this but i haven't received any feedback. Like it? Love it? Hate it? should i quit? let me know...**_

_**Any who... thanks to Edzie for pre-reading my chapter... you shine my love. **_

_**Disclaimer: Stehanie Meyer owns all... i own nothing but the plot of this story.**_

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**Bella**

After Edward left Carlisle's office I started to chicken out on what I wanted to tell him. I wasn't sure if I should tell him about my feelings for his son. That will have to be a conversation for another time.

So instead of bearing all I spoke to Carlisle about Sam and that I want to bring Maddy up to Seattle on weekends so that we can create a bond with each other. "Carlisle, I know that you have bent over backwards to make me feel comfortable here and I do and really appreciate what you have done for me already. I know that I went right off the deep end and blew my top before. I am sorry. I shouldn't have been so rash and taken out my frustrations on you. I am not usually like this and I don't like to leave previous employers before they have found a replacement. Please accept my apologies Carlisle. I feel so awful…"

Carlisle held his hand up to stop my rant and profuse apology. He chuckled a bit before saying "Bella, it is okay, really. If I had a penny for every time someone came in here and took their frustrations out on me I would be a very wealthy man. Not that I'm not wealthy in my own right at the moment, but I worked for it… but that's beside the point! What I meant to say that at least one person everyday quits on the spot but I don't pay too much attention because policy states that I need it in writing and at least two weeks' notice so I can find a replacement. The best thing I can do is try to help them with their problem. But I don't think that is what you really wanted to talk to me about because this could have been said in front of Edward. What's going on? I think I know but it would be good to hear it from you."

_Shit, shit. Shit… now I can't get out of it. He knows. How the hell did he find out?_ I looked down at my now clasped hands that were turning white with the strength of my clasp. I had a slight panicked look on my face and as I looked up at Carlisle I tried to mask it and he looked amused. Bastard! Looks like he knows my looks already, like he has always been my father and knows me inside and out.

"Um… what do you think that you know Carlisle? I don't want to make a fool out of myself if it is the wrong thing. Then I can keep what I know to myself for another day when I am more comfortable telling you." I tried to buy myself a little more time. How do I tell Carlisle that I really like his son, who happens to be engaged to Tanya? Yeah Tanya is gorgeous in a strawberry blonde model kind of way but she has the most annoying voice. It is all whiny and high pitched.

"Well Bella, by the look on your face and the blush that you wear the whole time you were in here with Edward tells me that you have some sort of feelings for him. And by the look he was giving you I would say he has the same feelings for you. So what I would like to know is does he know about it? I mean while you were in Forks what changed between the both of you to force such a shift in your friendship... or do I not want to know?" Carlisle smiled cheekily and it amazed me how much he knows by just looking at us and the way we acted together.

"Well there goes biding my time... it seems you hit the nail on the head but you are forgetting one thing and that is that Edward is engaged to Tanya. He can't have those kinds of feelings for me. And yes something did happen in Forks to change the dynamics of our friendship but it is something you shouldn't be privy to. It will remain between Edward and I but you can know that he has been my rock during the whole shit storm that was Forks.

The things that happened in Fork have also affected Alice in ways you can never dream about and she is deeply hurt by most of the parties involved. Especially Sam. She was a huge part of the Quileute tribe as she was adopted by Billy and Sue and then Jacob became her brother, whom she is very protective of. Sam is part of that tribe as well and I met him through Alice. We were and still are inseparable. I was always at Alice's house because I could do no right at home with Charlie and Renee. I got to know Sam really well and was trapped into thinking that he loved me. I know now that it was only a way to get me to sleep with him so that he could get what he wanted. He pretty much coerced me into sleeping with him and what are the odds that you get pregnant the first time you sleep with someone? But with my luck and parentage it had to happen to me.

When my parents found out, Sam made out that I was a slut and that I came onto him and my parents believed him over me. There is nothing more heartbreaking to know that your parents take someone else's word over their own daughter's and then to treat her like she is a slut and an embarrassment to them.

I tried my hardest to get Charlie and even Renee to let me keep my baby. I was willing to cut all ties with them if I could just keep my baby. Renee took me to Phoenix for a year so that no one would know that I was pregnant and so I could have the baby and then put it up for adoption. There was one loophole through all this though, which Edward made me aware of. I turned eighteen just before I gave birth which technically means that my parents had no right to take my baby away from me. My dad made an arrangement with Sam that he will give the baby to him and his then fiancée Emily for them to raise which I didn't know about. All I was told was that the baby was going to be adopted regardless of what I wanted but I did have a say in what to name her. I wanted her to be named Madison. I always knew it was going to be a girl from dreams I had and also feelings I had in regards to her. My dad the Chief of Police forged my signature on the adoption papers and signed away my parental rights.

When I was giving birth to her there were complications and I was haemorrhaging really bad and had to go straight into the operating theatre. I don't know what they did because no one would tell me what happened but all I was told when I woke up was that I couldn't have any more children. I was devastated but I wasn't allowed to show that emotion in front of Renee. All she said was to suck it up and deal with it. She told me that it was for the better if I couldn't have kids because then I could slut myself around and not have to worry about this ever happening again. I hated her and Charlie since then.

I went through school and college and as soon as I had my degree I left. I haven't looked back since and I feel better for it now. I don't want to be in the same town as them that's why I went to Port Angeles to stay rather than Forks. That's when all hell broke loose and information came into light about the adoption of Maddy.

Carlisle I want her back. I have had an ache in my heart since the day she was given away." Tears were streaming down my face and sometime during my story Carlisle shifted from behind his desk to sit beside me with his arm around my back. Just the way he was trying to soothe me was like a fatherly gesture. I sobbed louder as I don't ever remember my father or mother consoling me when things got tough... I was always told to suck it up.

"You know what Bella... your parents are stupid if they don't see what a smart and wonderful lady you have turned into. They are the ones missing out on you. It is stupid of them to try and form a bond with your daughter instead of their own daughter. If you were my daughter I would dote on you as I do Rose and you would always feel loved and want for nothing. If I could give you the world I would." With that last sentence I hugged Carlisle hard and openly cried on his shoulder for what seemed like forever. I pulled away and grabbed a few tissues to wipe my face and gave him a half smile.

"Thank you... I'm sorry for ruining your shirt." He laughed and looked at me like I hoed Charlie would look at me all those years ago. Then I introduced my foot to my mouth... "Carlisle I think I love Edward. What have I got myself into?" I looked up surprised and quickly covered my mouth with my hand. I guess somewhere in the consoling I felt comfortable enough to turn off my verbal filter. "My God, you weren't supposed to know that. Please disregard what I said…" I looked down in embarrassment. I can't believe I said that.

Carlisle chuckled… "Bella its fine. I will keep your secret but can I tell you that Edward feels protective of you. Especially when Tanya berated you in public and made those accusations without knowing the full story! Can I ask if there was any truth to those accusations? Did you sleep with Edward? I don't want to pry but this may become a legal issue with the hospital."

"It's ok… really… and to answer your question, we slept in the same bed with him just holding me but no sex was involved. We may have done other things but it was in response to the shit hitting the fan at Charlie and Renee's and all the skeletons coming out of the closet finally. I think Edward felt my pain and tried to take that pain away from me. That's all… I promise. Please don't let this affect the way you think about your son or treat him. I don't want to cause problems between him and Tanya." I put my head in my hands with my elbows resting on my knees. All Carlisle did was take a deep breath and pat my back. "It's all good Bella. At least I know what to say to Tanya if anything comes up." And with that he got up and went back behind his desk. There was a significant change to our relationship now. I could feel it.

Just as I was going to say something else, the phone rang in Carlisle's office. "…" I could hear loud voices on the other end of the line. But I couldn't hear what they were saying. All I could hear is Carlisle's part of the conversation. "Calm down please Angela… start again…" His facial expression changed into one of concern. "We are on our way… organise for the Ultrasound machine for when we get there… Bye"

"Bella let's go, I'll explain on the way." We both got up and rushed out to the maternity floor. "There is an emergency with Rosalie and she has been asking for you. Angela said something about severe cramping and it sounded like contractions. You need to check her out please. She can't lose this baby!" I gasped and ran down the stairs as it would be quicker… "I will do my best to save the baby Dr. Cullen. I promise on my baby's life." He half smiled at me as we got the maternity floor.

"Dr. Cullen, I'm going to need you to stay in the waiting room." He was about to protest when I held up my hand and told him that he was too close to the patient. "Angela you are with me." We went into the exam room and I saw the painful expression on Rosalie's face.

"Angela can you set up the ultrasound machine and pass me the Doppler please? Hey Rose, can you tell me what you are feeling?" All Rose did was groan in pain. I quickly explained to Rose that I'm going to listen for the heart beat and then do an ultrasound and an internal examination so that we can find out what's going on. I lifted her shirt up and tucked it under her bra. I gently coaxed her on her back and squeezed the gel on her tummy. I quickly found the heart beat and it was strong which was a good sign. Just as I was going to let Rose know, a big burly man stormed into the exam room.

"Oh my God Rose, are you ok? What's going on? I saw Carlisle and he told me you were in here. Are you her doctor? What's wrong with the baby? This can't be happening. CAN SOMEONE PLEASE JUST TELL ME WHAT'S GOING ON?" He all but yelled.

"I'm guessing you are Emmett." He just nodded and was about to speak again but I held up my hand to silence him. "Before you ask more questions, my name is Bella and I am Rose's doctor, this is Angela and she is assisting me today. Rose has been feeling pain in her stomach. I'm just checking to make sure that everything is ok." I placed the Doppler on her tummy again and heard the whooshing of the heart beat again. "This is the baby's heart beat and as you can hear it sounds strong and healthy. Now we need to see if the baby is doing fine and I'm going to do an ultrasound but I need to do an internal examination first to make sure these pains aren't contractions. Rose hunny, you are going to have to take your pants off for me and slip under this sheet. Can you get up and maybe Emmett can help you. Angela and I are going to step out for a moment. We will be back in a couple of minutes." I motioned for Angela to follow me. As we stepped out of the room and closed the door, I told Angela to rush down to the pharmaceutical room to get a few vials of specific drugs that we may need and the syringes as well. I wanted to be prepared if Rose was going into premature labour.

Angela rushed off and Carlisle caught a glimpse of her running when he came rushing towards me. I met him halfway and let him know that so far the heartbeat is nice and strong and healthy. I am getting Rose to undress so I can do an internal exam and I am getting Angela to get the drugs needed if she is in fact in premature labour. If she is I needed to stop the contractions and soon. I saw Angela rush back and I excused us from Carlisle and asked him to go and wait in the waiting room again. I knocked on the door and walked in. Rose was lying on the bed with the sheet over her.

"Please doc, you need to help her. She is in so much pain."

"That's what I'm trying to do, so you are going to have to take a seat near Rose's head and hold her hand and keep her calm. This is practise for the real thing. I promise I will do all I can for Rose. And you have a very concerned family in the waiting room at the moment. So let's see what's going on shall we? Angela, once I'm done with the internal, I'm going to do the ultrasound. Is everything ready?" Angela confirmed that it was as I took a seat at the business end and took a deep breath silently praying to God that there was nothing to be really concerned about.

I checked Rose to make sure that she wasn't dilated and was relieved when I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. "Rose, you aren't dilated, which is a good thing. If these pains are contractions we can stop them easily." I saw both Emmett and Rosalie sigh in relief just as a new wave of pain hit her.

After removing my gloves after doing the internal exam, I gently pushed on Rose's knees coaxing her to lay her legs straight. Angela moved the ultrasound machine next to the bed but on the opposite side of Emmett so they can both have a good look at the screen. Grabbing another sheet I covered Rose's legs and lifted the gown she was in above her tummy to tuck under her bra. I grabbed the wand from Angela just as I was squirting the gel on her belly again. It didn't take long to see the baby and as I was taking down all the measurements.

"Ok guys this is the story… your baby is fine and I can see that he/she is progressing along at the right rate. You are doing fine. There are no contractions but it most likely a case of Braxton Hicks, which is fake contractions. Now Rose hunny, I need you to tell me what you have eaten today that was different to what you normally eat." She looked confused at my question so I elaborated..."did you eat anything spicy or something out of the norm?" she nodded slightly and proceeded to tell me of everything she ate today...

"Well it started with froot loops but I couldn't stop at one bowl and then I had maybe a jar of gherkins that I dipped in peanut butter. Then I had a sandwich with bananas and peanut butter and I walked down to the local chicken shop and asked for large hot chips and a quarter of chicken. Then for afternoon tea I felt like Thai food but I wanted it really spicy and I got the hottest on their menu. Then I started feeling tis pain. So I came here. I didn't want she-devil to come anywhere near me and I pretty much accosted Angela. I'm really sorry I yelled at you!" Rose really looked apologetically.

" I went over to the sample cabinets and got out some Mylanta and Quikeze. I gave Rose a dose of Mylanta and a packet of Quik Eze. "You are going to need these if that is what you are going to eat every day. You had a really bad case of indigestion. And with all the grease you ate today I'm not surprised! This is some ant acid and whenever you feel a burning sensation in your throat I want you to take these, they help." Rose was vehemently nodding in affirmation.

"This is some good shit Bells, thank you so much for your concern and taking care of me. Is it too early or late to find out the sex of our baby? I think we both want to know. Right Em baby?" I looked towards Emmett and saw that he was still in a state of shock. I snapped my fingers in front of his face and he blinked a few times to shake him out of the trance he was in.

"Uh... Yeah... What she said. So my Rosie is ok? Nothing to worry about?" I nodded and got ready with the ultrasound machine again and I heard a huge sob and a sniffle. I turned around to see Emmett hugging Rose and crying chanting than you in her ears.

"So we ready to find out what you are having?" They both nodded and I smiled at them. I squirted some more gel on Rose's tummy and used the wand to see if I could find the sex. I found out what they were having and printed out some pictures for them to show around o the family. "What are you guys hoping for?"

"Not really fussed just want a happy healthy baby. But I think Em hopes for a boy so that he can do manly things with and I secretly hope for a girl because I can treat her to spa days as well as do girly things with." Rose was excited now that the pain had subsided. "This is really good shit... I don't feel any pain anymore." She was excited and it showed.

"Ok so you are having a..." I paused to give them a dramatic effect... "A boy and a girl!" I exclaimed excited for them. Emmett looked like he was going to faint. "What's wrong Emmett?"

"My kid is going to half girl and half boy... does it like have both thingy's?" Emmett whispered the last bit. I looked at Angela and Rose and we all started laughing. "What? What is wrong with you people? My kid is going to be some kind of freak and you are laughing!" he really looked hurt.

"No Emmett, your baby is fine but Rose is having twins. You have some really determined swimmers there champ." Once he realised that his baby was fine and he was indeed having two, he screamed and kissed Rose who was quiet but happy and crying. Then all of a sudden Emmett, ran out of the room and was yelling down the hall to the waiting room where everyone was waiting to hear what happened with Rose. Needless to say, the whole family was ecstatic.

Rose got up and thanked me again for being so attentive. I told her that I would see her Sunday and she looked at m weird. "Of course dad would ask you to the family brunch on Sunday. You will be his favourite by the end of the week Bella."

I shook my head no and proceeded to tell her "no, your dad thinks that I may be able to get some pointers from Esme in regards to a few persona matters. I was in your dad's office when you came in. I needed to tell him a few things that are going on in my life and it is quite similar to some experiences your mum has had. I just hope Tanya won't be there. We already had an altercation in the front of the hospital out of all places. I'll tell you all about it on Sunday. Oh and you can meet my best friend Alice as she is dating Jasper and they have also been invited on Sunday."

"I can't wait. I'm going to go and save all your patients from Emmett." She waved and then was gone. I looked at Angela and burst out laughing... it out of sheer relief that Rose and the baby were ok and it the way Emmett reacted once the all clear was given was priceless.

~~~~~ E x B ~~~~~

Before I knew it Sunday rolled around and I was getting butterflies in my stomach. "Ugh Alice... I can't go. I have nothing to wear and I can't see Edward again. Or face Carlisle since he knows how I feel about Edward. How can I face Esme, and talk to her about things that are so private to me. But now that Edward, Jasper, you and Carlisle know about Maddy and everything that happened in Forks this past week. I don't know if I can relive the whole torture of what happened to me five years ago. Oh my God I think I'm having a panic attack." I sank to the floor and started hyperventilating and I put my head between my knees to try and regulate my breathing a bit.

Alice came over and rubbed circles on my back to try and soothe me all the while silently laughing at my outburst. I looked up at her and noticed her shoulders shaking and shot up off the floor. "Thanks a lot for your support bitch." I whined trying to suppress my laughter as well.

"Shut up you know you love me. Seriously Bella, its just brunch. Don't stress so hard and I'm sure that Carlisle has told Esme all she needs to know to give you advice. Nothing more... he would have given her just the bare minimum and the rest is for you to fill in if you want to. Don't forget that he has to work with you and Edward is still your lawyer regardless of your feelings towards him and your friendship. Now let's go find you a nice sundress to wear so that you look amazing and show off your gorgeous figure. Make the men sweat!" Alice giggled as she led me to my bedroom and dove into my closet.

We made our way to the Cullen's house and we were gobsmacked on how big their house was. "Shit I don't feel like I dressed up enough. I feel like I'm from the slums and don't fit into this setting. Shouldn't we be maids or something to these people?" I started feeling the butterflies again until someone tapped on my window. I jumped and cursed like a sailor holding my chest thinking that I have just had a heart attack. Looking out the window I saw Edward there. I smiled and opened my door.

"Hey you scared me..." slapping him in the arm. "I should go home and change. I feel underdressed." Edward shook his head "No you shouldn't, you look beautiful. But I must warn you... Tanya decided last night that she wanted to come today. Please don't let her get to you. She is bitter and thinks that there is more to our relationship than there is. But I told her that we are friends and that there is nothing going on with us. She already knows that you will be here and that she is to be nice or she can leave. I told her that my dad invited you so if she can't handle you being here then she can leave."

"Thanks for the warning but I can handle myself. If she starts anything, I won't take it but I won't disrespect your family either. She is a part of your family but she isn't at work. So if I have to deal with her it will be there or outside the hospital grounds. I have had to deal with a lot before and I'm sure that Tanya has met her match if she thinks that she can start anything with me." I was defensive, but I didn't need Edward to fight my battles. I can do that on my own.

We walked in with Alice chatting away until she spotted Jasper. She ran over to greet him. I smiled and thought that someday it could be me running to greet Edward that way. I can only dream. I followed Edward into the backyard as it was a lovely day and we were apparently having brunch outside.

"BELLA. OH MY GOD. YOU CAME!" I was taken aback by the enthusiasm of Emmett. I thought he was loud in the office but seriously... this guy has a good set of lungs on him.

"Hey Emmett, good to see you again. And how is it that you can be louder than when I saw you at the hospital a few days ago?" I laughed. But I was caught off guard when I felt a set of arms embrace me. I looked up confused as I pulled away a little.

"Hi I'm Esme. I need to thank you for everything you did for Rose. I really can't thank you enough. You my dear are what is needed in this family. You are compassionate and willing to go to any lengths to help us. I know that to you Rose may be another patient and Edward may be your lawyer and Carlisle your boss but please think of all of us as friends and family. We look after our own, and you may not have the Cullen name but you certainly act like a Cullen." She then proceeded to kiss my cheek and hug me again. I started feeling a little teary and I felt like I belonged to a family. I have never felt like this before. My parents didn't treat me like this. It is really an eye opener to see how real families act.

"Who invited you?" snarled Tanya. "Our boss did Tanya... you know him... Carlisle. And if memory serves me right you knew about m coming so why act all shocked?" I bit back but quietly. I didn't want to cause a scene as I have just officially been welcomed into this family by the matriarch of the clan.

She inched closer and pretty much got into my face, "they are my family, remember that. You will always be an outsider and not really belong. They are just being friendly. They all acted the same to me when I first started dating Edward. But after a while they will see you for who you really are and that is a gold digging whore. Stay away from Edward and stay away from my family."

I bit my tongue and tried to reign in my anger... "Let me tell you this Tanya. At work I am more senior to you so you will make sure you give me the respect I deserve at work or I could have you fired. Remember that! Also I can't stay away from Edward as he is my lawyer and we will be spending lots of time together until everything is finalised. Also, Rose is MY patient not yours. She wasn't comfortable around you and said that you treated her like shit. At least I care for my patents. So I won't be staying away from her either. And you know what? Carlisle is my boss too and seeing as though we will be working together it would be pretty much hard to stay away from him. Don't you come all up in my face and tell me what to do when you haven't thought through your threats. You have surely met your match Tanya and don't forget that." I started to turn around to see if Esme needs any help when I added "Oh and call me a gold digging whore just one more time and your life will not be worth living when I'm finished with you. I have the means to hurt you in ways you don't know and it won't be traceable back to me. If you think I'm a gold digging whore why don't you look in the mirror because it takes one to know one. Think about that Bitch."

My words sounded petty but it felt good to drop her down a peg or two from her pedestal she thinks she is on. I was now officially pissed and needed to find Esme to groove back. She has such a calming personality and I can see where Edward gets his looks from. He has Esme's green eyes and bronze hair but he has Carlisle's chiselled jaw. I could indulge all things Edward right about now.

I went into the back door and into the kitchen where I saw Esme deep in thought doing the last minute things to the food. "Can I help you with anything Esme? I feel like I need to do something for you to thank you for your hospitality." I wanted to say that I needed a hug and I needed to get away from Tanya.

"I saw the altercation you had with Tanya and whatever you said to her at the end really frightened her. What happened? Cause you look like you could use a hug." She walked over and gave me my much needed hug. I held onto her for dear life. "she accused me of being a gold digging whore and I told her that it takes one to know one and that if she ever called me that again that I would make her life not worth living and that I have contact to help me and I can hide my tracks. Nothing I can't handle really. Thank you for the hug... my parents weren't to forth giving in affections towards me. I think they wished I was a boy. God knows that they took a boyfriends word over mine. Well he was at the time, but now I don't want anything to do with him. I'm sorry Esme I didn't mean to get all heavy on you." I started getting teary thinking about my life and how hard it has been living with my parents... maybe I should be calling them egg and sperm donors cause it is quite evident that they weren't parents at all.

"Oh honey, it's okay to feel the way you do. I hope you don't mind but Carlisle told me some of what happened to you and my darling, it is ok to talk to me if you want. I don't know everything but he did mention that you had a daughter and poor excuse of parents. We can be your pseudo parents if you like. Come to us with anything. How about after brunch we take a walk and we can talk. Maybe I can help you with your situation with your daughter and give you some insight on how we felt when we had to give up our daughter. I have hired a private detective to find her but there has been no luck finding her except to know that she actually lives in Seattle. We don't know what she looks like, how she has turned out. She could be living on the streets for all we know. I wonder if her adoptive parents told her that she was adopted if they did, does she want to find us. Now that we can handle raising all our children and want to make up for lost time and do what we can to show her that we still love her very much and that it wasn't her fault. We were to blame for everything and once we signed the documents we regretted it. But with two young children at home already we couldn't afford another one. I also found that I couldn't handle raising two children under two when she was born. It seems like I had a baby and then I was pregnant again with another a couple of months later, this happened for all three children. I couldn't cope, I had the baby blues and I couldn't afford to keep all three kids fed and clothed and nurtured without something giving. Carlisle was still at university at the time getting his PhD in medicine so he could be the doctor h is today. But my youngest daughter is never forgotten and there isn't a day that I wish things were different. That I could have managed without having a breakdown. There are a lot of 'what if's' and 'buts'' in my story but there is nothing I can do to change the past. I can only dream of finding her and getting our family back. Of getting my daughter back. That is my only prayer at night. I have always told Rosalie and Edward about their sister and to never take things for granted.

You my dear are a very down to earth person. You have seen hardships and have known the loss of a baby like I have. We can sympathise with each other. The only thing that is different is our circumstances. Yours was influenced by people that didn't take into your feelings and thoughts on the matter. We can support each other in gaining our daughters back. As I said before... I am here for you and so is Carlisle. When you are ready I would like to know your story. It would make things easier to help you. I know that Edward and Carlisle know everything and will do everything in their power to help you as well. Now let's get everything on the table outside so we can escape this rowdy bunch and chat some more." We gave each other one last hug and gathered the food and took it all to the food table set up outside,

After everything was on the table and everyone had a plate in front of them... I sat in awe of this family. I have not seen anything like it before. Let's just say that brunch was interesting! It was loud and raucous and just like a family should be. Even though Jasper isn't a part of the family it amazed me how well he fit in. And so did Alice.

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_****__**Till next time**_


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